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Old 06-20-2009, 09:10 PM   #1  
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My boyfriend just learned that a friend of his died yesterday from a heart attack. This man was overweight and was recently diagnosed with Diabetes.

I feel so horrible to say this but after the initial shock of it all, I sat there and thought "Im overweight, I was recently diagnosed with Diabetes."

Im scared, Im angry, Im in shock, and Im confused.

Why am I taking life so lightly? There is no guarantee that the same thing will not happen to me.

I am sitting here, eating what I want, doing what I want, and not caring that I am sitting here destroying myself.

Why does it take a death for me to think about my mortality?
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Old 06-20-2009, 09:26 PM   #2  
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Denial is a powerful force. It's easy to ignore the negative changes of gaining weight as the cumulative effect seems more painful than the individual pounds. A wake up call is a gift - a view through the denial fog, as it were.

A friend of mine, overweight, 36, female, atrocious diet recently survived a heart attack and had a stent put in. It's shocking to hear of someone so young having something like that happen. But it was a wake up call to me too. We shared too many things in common that I had to think, "there, but for the grace of God, go I".

Let something good come from a tragic situation and let it be a reminder of how fragile our lives - and bodies - are.
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Old 06-20-2009, 09:55 PM   #3  
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Because it always happens to someone else. We look for reasons, I think, to reassure ourselves that bad things happen to other people for some reason that doesn't apply to us. So we are somehow not going to suffer the same fate. You know, like when a pedestrian gets hit by a car, and the paper makes sure that we know that the pedestrian was out at night wearing dark clothes. We think "well, I stay in at night, and I always wear bright clothes" and this somehow makes us feel like this couldn't happen to us. Or when we read about someone getting lost while hiking, and the paper says that he or she didn't file a hiking plan with the authorities. And we say "That was stupid. I always tell people where I will be." and we feel better because that couldn't happen to US.
But when the reason DOES apply to us, we suddenly realize that we are human. We make mistakes and silly decisions and sometimes stuff HAPPENS and we are vulnerable.
You've seen this because your boyfriend's friend was diagnosed with the SAME thing you have been diagnosed with, and he died. And you could die too. And it becomes REAL.
Seize this opportunity to change your life. Your boyfriend's friend would want that. And we all want that for you too. You have to want it for yourself. You can do this. Noone can affect your future and give you the best chance at a great life other than YOU...
You can do it...

Kira

Last edited by kiramira; 06-20-2009 at 09:56 PM.
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Old 06-20-2009, 10:42 PM   #4  
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I think a lot of us are/were in denial. Don't feel bad about your mistakes. But feel bad if you keep making them.

I don't have diabetes, but I do have a pre-disposition to it, heart disease and I have PCOS. And I just didn't care. Until I got old enough I thought that I might not be able to outrun these diseases forever.

Be shocked. It's good to be shocked, although I'm sorry it's in such a tragic form. Hopefully this will give you the shake you need (the shake we all need at some point) to get committed to being healthier.
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Old 06-20-2009, 10:53 PM   #5  
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Tragedies like this are scary. Just knowing someone in real life that it affected with such a poor outcome makes it so much more real. They really get you thinking. "Maybe this COULD happen to me".

There are no guarantees in life. But being a healthy weight- well at least then you know for sure you've done all that you can on your part to stave off a bunch of totally avoidable, debilitating and yes, deadly diseases. Take this opportunity to seize control of your very own life. Wouldn't that be amazing, using this tragedy to propel you into ACTION and better your life. Go for it!!!! Don't wait for a bigger disaster to strike. You have the power to reverse this. You hold the strings.........
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Old 06-20-2009, 11:28 PM   #6  
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I am sorry for the shock you and your boyfriend have suffered over the loss of a friend. Please take the good of the situation (Though it may be hard to see) and know that there is a way to manage your weight problem and your diabetes by getting your health on track. You can do it!

You have a recieved a gift of sorts, even in tragic form, you have recieved a wake up call to let you know, it's time to get serious and get down to business.

Good luck to you on your journey to healthy. See you there?
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Old 06-20-2009, 11:30 PM   #7  
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That is scary, but I agree with a PP that a wakeup call is a gift, take it for the best and do what you can to better your health today. We can't control tomorrow, but we can do our best with this moment that we DO have before us!
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Old 06-21-2009, 07:03 AM   #8  
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I like that line of thinking - a wake up call is a gift. I will remember that. Thank you.
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Old 06-21-2009, 07:09 AM   #9  
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I really started getting myself in gear when a very dear friend of mine died recently. He was 40 and overweight. He died of pulmonary embolism. That's not to say it wouldn't have happened anyway but his lifestyle was against him. When I think about the fact that he is gone I'm devastated all over again. We were "diet" buddies and workout partners on and off for more than 10 years. Now I'm doing this for more than just me. I'm doing it for him, I'm doing it to give a healthy example to my stepkids (they are the ONLY kids I'll have). I don't want to just die suddenly because *I* didn't take life seriously.
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Old 06-21-2009, 08:55 AM   #10  
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I'm sorry to hear about your loss. It is very scary, be kind to yourself though you are on the right track
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Old 06-21-2009, 09:13 AM   #11  
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The good news is that with a good diet and exercise, you can help stave off many 'obesity related' illnesses. You don't have to be at your goal weight. Even losing 10% of your body weight provides a big boost to your health.

Start today and do what you can to make a healthier you.
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Old 06-21-2009, 11:21 AM   #12  
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I think the best thing to do when facing such a tragedy is, as others have said, to accept this as a wake up call (and a gift... so well put). The thing we have to guard against is when the shock of the event wears off. We can't become complacent and go back to the world of denial... that it won't happen to me. We must stay vigilant and do what we can to be healthy and give ourselves the best possible chance to avoid the same fate.
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Old 06-22-2009, 07:48 PM   #13  
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Thank you all so much for your supportive words. They mean more than ya'll know.

Ever since we found out about his death I have been trying real hard to make sure I make better choices.

Again, thank you ladies for your words of support!
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