Advice needed for a kid going into college :) Please - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

BumpSetSpike · 11-16-2008, 10:18 PM

Hello,
so the closer it gets to scholarship deadlines, the more anxiety I get about this.
With the economy going to ****... jobs disappearing and all... it makes me a little nervous.
The biggest factor is being on my own. I am really scared of that. I am so shy, I am worried I won't make friends. Plus I am overweight and as most of you know that affects your self esteem... if not you it does to me, quite a bit.

How did your experiance go? And is there any advice you can offer me?

junebug41 · 11-16-2008, 10:27 PM

College is a great place to get over low self esteem! All the activities and groups and people in the same boat you are... the possibilities are quite endless.

Are you going to live on campus?

Also, with the economy in the toilet, college would seem like a really good place to be for the next few years

ETA: Also, I was overweight when I started college and found that it didn't matter one bit. I was in marching band and lived in the dorms so I was always amongst friends and band especially kept me very busy.

kelly315 · 11-16-2008, 10:34 PM

Are you going to school with anyone you've known from high school? How about staying in a dorm? Roommate? These kinds of people can be your lifeline, and give you the confidence enough to go out and make more friends. If you aren't going to have anyone like that around, still, no need to be scared. There are tons of freshmen entering with the exact feelings that you have right now. Remember, no matter who you are or how old you are, its always going to be awkward meeting people. while some people are very extroverted and seem to be great at making friends, it is still tough for them when the eventually open up enough to make real friends. Everyone expects that it will be hard to meet people, but if you accept that things will get warmer as you spend more time together, it's not so bad!

Also, it's been about four years since I've been a freshman, but a lot of schools will give you your roommate's number and/or email when you get a room assignment. Make the move to try to get to know them a little before you live together- email is a whole lot less pressure- and you could end up with a good friend that way.

Good Luck!

xdominic89x · 11-16-2008, 10:37 PM

I'm living at home during college and love it. College is like a life away from home and then I still have the comfort of coming home and sleeping in my own bed

sm177 · 11-16-2008, 11:40 PM

I went into university being shy, overweight and just in general awkward. I barely even knew anyone in the city. I lived at home in my first year and still do. So far other than all the work and studying it has been amazing! I've met so many people and have had so many amazing experiences. It really helped me to put all my insecurities aside. Now I'm half way through my third year and I have tons of friends at school and in the city. Don't be worried, be excited! Like many things in life, university is what you make it!

Sheila53 · 11-17-2008, 12:27 AM

For me, it's been over 35 years since college, but I remember feeling just like you. I moved out of state, lived in the dorm, and ended up making friends (who were all nervous and scared, too) and having a great time.

Billies Pottery · 11-17-2008, 12:35 AM

It's easy to make friends in college.
What are you majoring in?

DRose · 11-17-2008, 01:58 AM

I'm in my second year of college right now. I'd say definitely email or call your roommate before moving in, if you're in the dorms that is. Also if you're a light sleeper invest in some ear plugs. All in all college has been a lot of fun, but always remember all the incoming freshman are just as nervous as you are.

Living in the dorms has taught me a few different things I wasn't expecting. I've always tried to avoid confrontation, but now I just deal with it. If my roommate is doing something that is pissing me off, I tell her. If I need help in a class I just go get it. It has definitely made me a lot more assertive.

Oh and the overweight thing so doesn't matter in college. By the end of the year most of the freshman will have gained anyway. Just have fun and be open to new experiences!

rileyozzy · 11-17-2008, 04:31 AM

I teach high school English (12th grade) and all of the seniors seem to have at least some anxiety about going off to college, so what you are feeling is totally normal. It's been about 15 years since college for me, but living in the dorms allowed me to make fast friends who I am still friends with. There are a lot of drawbacks about the dorms, but I highly suggest it if you are moving away. It is such a social support system because everyone is in the same boat as you are. And remember that college is not like high school. You should find more open minded, accepting and mature people. Good luck and you will do great!

tikanique · 11-17-2008, 09:26 AM

I hit college overweight, freshly out of a relationship that severely bruised my self-esteem, etc. College was great for all of that. The walking from class to class helped with the weight. The large number of groups that I could join helped with friends and self esteem.

Good luck to you, get out there, and keep those grades UP!!! :-)

shantroy · 11-17-2008, 03:54 PM

I was shy too, when I started university. I moved to the other side of the country, to a province I'd never even set foot in before and to a school where I knew no one. I was petrified. I kept telling my mom that I could still drop out and start at the university in my home town in January. By the end of frosh week, those thoughts were gone.

I lived in the dorms which is a fantastic way to meet people. I'm still close to just about everyone I met in my first week of school. I joined a whole bunch of clubs and loved every minute of it.

I'd have to agree with Junebug, with the economy going down hill, it's a pretty good time to be in school!

MissCely · 11-17-2008, 04:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BumpSetSpike

Hello,
so the closer it gets to scholarship deadlines, the more anxiety I get about this.
With the economy going to ****... jobs disappearing and all... it makes me a little nervous.
The biggest factor is being on my own. I am really scared of that. I am so shy, I am worried I won't make friends. Plus I am overweight and as most of you know that affects your self esteem... if not you it does to me, quite a bit.

How did your experiance go? And is there any advice you can offer me?

Hey I just got out of college, I know how you feel. 4 years ago, I was feeling this way. But here is some advice I lived by:

-Eating fast food all the time makes you go broke.
-Study Hard, party harder.
-Drink, in moderation.
-Friends come and go, someday you will know everyone on campus!
-Your journey starts the day you walk in, it ends the day you get your diploma, so dont quit half-way.
-You get sad and depressed, but its only temporary, you will enjoy your college life to the fullest! I hope you the best, enjoy whats left of your life now, because a better one is coming!

Much love! Cely

sacha · 11-17-2008, 07:00 PM

Take a large variety of undergraduate courses! Explore! You will be exposed to so many things you NEVER thought of and it will probably change your life :-) I started in Criminal Justice (my original intent coming out of high school) and have worked in the field for a few years, but now I'm in teaching :-) I'm graduating in June with my degree and teaching certificate.

alinnell · 11-17-2008, 07:07 PM

I don't mean to butt in...I'm the mother of a college freshman. She's living in the dorms but is close enough that she can come home for the weekend, but has only done it twice since school started in August.

Let me tell you--I have NEVER seen my daughter so happy! Sure she doesn't get along with her suitemates, but she LOVES her classes (so much better than high school which she considered a chore). She can't wait to start her next semester to get more fun classes.

I noticed your signature--you love Chopin. My daughter is a music education major (actually double major with computer science).

Anyway, advice. Apply EVERYWHERE. My daughter applied to about 7 schools and got into all but one. The one she didn't get into (USC) was a long shot and she knew it. Her high school grades weren't the best (see above note about "chore"). She didn't get any scholarships, but she applied for everything that came her way. She is still applying for scholarships. Hopefully something will come her way. In the mean time, don't stop trying.

Good luck to you!

ETA: My daughter joined a Facebook group from her school so she could get to know other students graduating in her same year. They meet up from time to time at school and that really helped her get used to the whole "away from home" thing.

sprklemajik · 11-18-2008, 01:42 PM

The good news about college is that you get to start fresh. No one has any preconcieved ideas about you. Everyone will be nervous, it's a great place to grow up and find your identity.