3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community  

Go Back   3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community > Support Forum > Support Groups > 20-Somethings

Annoyed with some friends...

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 02-04-2014, 05:35 PM   #1
Senior Member
 
hhm6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 622

S/C/G: 200/ticker/130

Height: 5'2

Default Annoyed with some friends...

Hey guys,

So I've had a string of complaining threads recently (my apologies!) but something really irked me today. So I used to live in Vegas, I had a lot of friends who were club promoters and we went out now and then. I'm not into the club scene as much as they are, but it's very obvious when you go and you're out of place. Anyway, lately I've seeing posts on their wall like this

http://i.lolthis.com/lt/000/058/907/58907.jpg

and it really bothers me, bothers me so much that I can't help but what wonder what they thought when I went clubbing with them. When I went, I always heard comments of the "bigger" girls ruining it for the hot girls, and it bothered me, not at but other girls. I don't care for that scene but it sucks that the culture is like that in the Vegas area. It almost makes me feel embarrassed for going, since I have no idea what other people thought, not that I should care, but why be so rude?

I guess I'm worrying about a problem that is pointless, but I just feel like it's insensitive when people post things like that
__________________



Starting measurements
8/23/12--->42-37-45 (200lbs)
10/4/12--->41-37-44 (190lbs)
4/09/13--->40-36-42 (180lbs)
5/18/13--->40-34-42 (170lbs)
3/01/14--->40-34-42 (170lbs)
9/15/14--- (173lbs)
1/8/15---> 40-35-43 (179lbs)
2/08/15--------------176lbs
hhm6 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-04-2014, 05:51 PM   #2
Food and Wine Lover
 
Chardonnay's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 312

S/C/G: Goal Weight: 125

Height: 5'3"

Default

Well, the world can be a heartless place right? Those types of jokes will always be around. Whatever gender, race, religion, height, weight, age etc....there is always going to be an insensitive joke about it. And people who we thought were friends will make such jokes maybe not realizing that it seems we are the target of the joke. Best not to take it personally at all. But it's a good way to weed out the insensitive people in your life too.
__________________


Mini Goal For October
Chardonnay is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-04-2014, 06:48 PM   #3
From Hippo to Hot!
 
Riestrella's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: England
Posts: 2,499

S/C/G: 200/ticker/130

Height: 5'5"

Default

When I used to go clubbing I was 30-40 lbs heavier. I would go with my friends who are all slim and gorgeous. Not once did they ever make me feel like the odd one out, they always encouraged me to have fun and enjoy the moment. Friends are supposed to support each other, to bring out the best in one another, to have the best fun they can together! These friends sound toxic and I think you don't really trust them. Find people who bring out the best in you and don't make you doubt yourself or hurt your confidence.
Riestrella is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-04-2014, 06:54 PM   #4
critter lover
 
JayZeeJay's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Northern California
Posts: 484

S/C/G: 160+/144/130-135 and healthy

Height: 5'6.5"

Default

When I saw that, my first thought is that it's a pun - the "clubbing seals" gag that is going around right now (see image). However, that is not to say that it cannot be interpreted as a hurtful comment...
Attached Images
File Type: jpg stop-clubbing-baby-seals.jpg (29.5 KB, 47 views)
JayZeeJay is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 02-04-2014, 07:07 PM   #5
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 14

S/C/G: 299/289/145

Height: 5'7"

Default

I dont think that is suppose to be taken as a comment towards bigger people clubbing, but about clubbing seals. That was my first thought on it. Theres a whole thing about clubbing baby seals.
all4meh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-04-2014, 07:31 PM   #6
banned
 
Pattience's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Tropical Australia
Posts: 1,270

S/C/G: 80.2kg/66kg/60kg x2.2 for lb

Height: 165cm/5' 4.5"

Default

I don't think it necessarily meant anything about how they felt about you. But you would know if you fitted in with that crowd or not.

Anyway try not to dwell on things like that and just keep focussed on what you want for yourself. Stay away from people who say hurtful things. Although sometimes i have to admit, its the hurtful things that can prompt us to action for the change.

Keep your chin up. Life is not easy for most of us. We just have to find ways to let go the hurt and stay true to the good stuff.
Pattience is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-04-2014, 07:32 PM   #7
Senior Member
 
hhm6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 622

S/C/G: 200/ticker/130

Height: 5'2

Default

Well the reason I thought it was clubbing was because it was an opening of a new club, so promoters who bring in the "hottest group" of girls essentially get paid more, or something along the lines of that, seeing the photo made me think it was related to not bringing in girls who were overweight.

They're never directed anything to me like that, I don't really bring up the topic with them at all tbh. It just seems insensitive, but meh I think I've over it now. I'm glad I'm not in Vegas or part of that lifestyle.
__________________



Starting measurements
8/23/12--->42-37-45 (200lbs)
10/4/12--->41-37-44 (190lbs)
4/09/13--->40-36-42 (180lbs)
5/18/13--->40-34-42 (170lbs)
3/01/14--->40-34-42 (170lbs)
9/15/14--- (173lbs)
1/8/15---> 40-35-43 (179lbs)
2/08/15--------------176lbs
hhm6 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-04-2014, 07:59 PM   #8
Senior Member
 
Quiet Ballerina's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Virginia
Posts: 1,007

S/C/G: 171/ticker/121

Height: 5' 1"

Default

Another vote that I thought it was about clubbing seals.
__________________
Quiet Ballerina is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-05-2014, 02:42 AM   #9
I can, I will, I do
 
Avezy44's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 550

S/C/G: Goal: 130

Height: 5'6"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by JayZeeJay View Post
When I saw that, my first thought is that it's a pun - the "clubbing seals" gag that is going around right now (see image). However, that is not to say that it cannot be interpreted as a hurtful comment...
That's what I got from it too. I do completely understand though... I don't really like going clubbing for any reason other than the opportunity to dance and dress up... my friends motives are more superficial. I actually don't really hang out with those friends anymore since I started losing weight for that reason. I think you should just feel happy that you're not around what makes you uncomfortable anymore. I'm sorry you feel annoyed though, it's not fun feeling that way towards friends.
__________________

My Blog: http://avegetsbrave.blogspot.com/
1st Milestone: -10lbs {1/31/14} 2nd Milestone: -20lbs {2/17/2014} 3rd Milestone: -30lbs {3/10/14} 4th Milestone: -40lbs {4/2/14} 5th Milestone: -50lbs {5/12/14} 6th Milestone: -60lbs {12/15/14}
Avezy44 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2014, 05:30 PM   #10
Senior Member
 
hhm6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 622

S/C/G: 200/ticker/130

Height: 5'2

Default

Hey guys,

Just thought I would update, there were quite a few comments under the post that got flamed responses, so I think the intent was directed at a weight issue. (But LOL at the other image!)

Quoting one of the comments "If you girls think you're actually HOT, now is the time to put it to the test, get into Drais without a cover charge, you're hot. Fatties no you can't pay off or -------- the bouncers to get in"

The other comments are quite vulgar, I almost feel like deleting these people on my Fb, since they aren't friends (more like acquaintances) and I have little respect for people who like this about other people. But it also makes me feel so relieved to not be around that industry when I'm working so hard to lose weight now.
__________________



Starting measurements
8/23/12--->42-37-45 (200lbs)
10/4/12--->41-37-44 (190lbs)
4/09/13--->40-36-42 (180lbs)
5/18/13--->40-34-42 (170lbs)
3/01/14--->40-34-42 (170lbs)
9/15/14--- (173lbs)
1/8/15---> 40-35-43 (179lbs)
2/08/15--------------176lbs
hhm6 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2014, 05:48 PM   #11
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Alaska
Posts: 97

S/C/G: 313/286/140

Height: 5'8

Default

Totally thought that was referring to clubbing seals (which is very sad), but after reading your comment, and their responses... I hesitate to say otherwise. People like that are no one's friends, and delete them ASAP. No one needs that in their life. If they aren't friends, DELETE them. Facebook was not meant to demean and put down, it was meant to network and socialize - that's just harassment.

They may not be saying that to you, but the fact that they are saying it all to anyone is despicable. The depiction of what "beauty" is, is fleeting, and what you can count on is the heart behind someone. We can lose weight, but you can't change someone's attitude or the intent of their heart. (IE - I can lose weight, but you can't lose an ugly personality)
__________________
JulesMarion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2014, 06:19 PM   #12
Senior Member
 
hhm6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 622

S/C/G: 200/ticker/130

Height: 5'2

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by JulesMarion View Post
Totally thought that was referring to clubbing seals (which is very sad), but after reading your comment, and their responses... I hesitate to say otherwise. People like that are no one's friends, and delete them ASAP. No one needs that in their life. If they aren't friends, DELETE them. Facebook was not meant to demean and put down, it was meant to network and socialize - that's just harassment.

They may not be saying that to you, but the fact that they are saying it all to anyone is despicable. The depiction of what "beauty" is, is fleeting, and what you can count on is the heart behind someone. We can lose weight, but you can't change someone's attitude or the intent of their heart. (IE - I can lose weight, but you can't lose an ugly personality)
Yes clubbing seals is really sad I was referring to a post someone posted about seals on the dance floor.

I just deleted them, I had about 15 promoters as friends on here. I think I gave them a lot of business by getting people on their guest list, but I don't think they'd even wave at me if they saw me in public. They cater to a certain clientele (I can see the type of things they like on fb, it's just all very superficial) not referring to all promoters here just those who are on my fb.

The sad thing is, these guys/girls aren't models either (not to say if you're model status you can talk this way about people) but it's ridiculous to me how they feel so entitled to speak this way, and it just makes the whole Vegas environment seem so condescending towards women in general. But anyway, thanks for letting me get my rant out
__________________



Starting measurements
8/23/12--->42-37-45 (200lbs)
10/4/12--->41-37-44 (190lbs)
4/09/13--->40-36-42 (180lbs)
5/18/13--->40-34-42 (170lbs)
3/01/14--->40-34-42 (170lbs)
9/15/14--- (173lbs)
1/8/15---> 40-35-43 (179lbs)
2/08/15--------------176lbs
hhm6 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2014, 07:02 PM   #13
I can, I will, I do
 
Avezy44's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 550

S/C/G: Goal: 130

Height: 5'6"

Default

I know exactly the type. I have a couple of friends that are like that.. that is just toxic. The best thing to do is what you have done. Just don't ever feel like they are right because in this instance, they are the ones with the problem. Kudos for cutting them out!
__________________

My Blog: http://avegetsbrave.blogspot.com/
1st Milestone: -10lbs {1/31/14} 2nd Milestone: -20lbs {2/17/2014} 3rd Milestone: -30lbs {3/10/14} 4th Milestone: -40lbs {4/2/14} 5th Milestone: -50lbs {5/12/14} 6th Milestone: -60lbs {12/15/14}
Avezy44 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2014, 07:19 PM   #14
Senior Member
 
canadjineh's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 2,160

S/C/G: 163/133/132

Height: 5'8" 173 cm 50 yrs old

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by hhm6 View Post

I just deleted them, I had about 15 promoters as friends on here. I think I gave them a lot of business by getting people on their guest list, but I don't think they'd even wave at me if they saw me in public. They cater to a certain clientele (I can see the type of things they like on fb, it's just all very superficial) not referring to all promoters here just those who are on my fb.

The sad thing is, these guys/girls aren't models either (not to say if you're model status you can talk this way about people) but it's ridiculous to me how they feel so entitled to speak this way, and it just makes the whole Vegas environment seem so condescending towards women in general. But anyway, thanks for letting me get my rant out
Way to go hhm6! Those people are not 'friends' so good on you for losing them. Just remember those of us who have/are modelling aren't all like that either. Peoples' personalities really have nothing to do with their body size. Skinny pricks are still pricks if they gain weight and vice-versa. I'm sure you have much better friends with more developed personalities to concentrate on and it will be a positive upbuilding experience for you from now on. Keep on goin...
__________________


At goal or below since March 5, 2014
canadjineh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2014, 03:22 AM   #15
Senior Member
 
hhm6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 622

S/C/G: 200/ticker/130

Height: 5'2

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Avezy44 View Post
I know exactly the type. I have a couple of friends that are like that.. that is just toxic. The best thing to do is what you have done. Just don't ever feel like they are right because in this instance, they are the ones with the problem. Kudos for cutting them out!
Thanks Avezy!! It really is, and even though they don't think they're doing anything wrong, I can't imagine who they're hurting as they have 2000+ friends on fb.

Quote:
Originally Posted by canadjineh View Post
Way to go hhm6! Those people are not 'friends' so good on you for losing them. Just remember those of us who have/are modelling aren't all like that either. Peoples' personalities really have nothing to do with their body size. Skinny pricks are still pricks if they gain weight and vice-versa. I'm sure you have much better friends with more developed personalities to concentrate on and it will be a positive upbuilding experience for you from now on. Keep on goin...
Thanks canadjineh! I completely agree with everything you said! I actually met an EXTREMELY fit guy at Target a while back who told me something I was buying wouldn't help with my obesity (so rude omg I wanted to cry at that moment I remember), and I've had family friends who aren't in the best shape ask me why I'm not worried about my looks at my age, meh what are you gonna do? It's ok though I have a small group of friends and 3FC to go to
__________________



Starting measurements
8/23/12--->42-37-45 (200lbs)
10/4/12--->41-37-44 (190lbs)
4/09/13--->40-36-42 (180lbs)
5/18/13--->40-34-42 (170lbs)
3/01/14--->40-34-42 (170lbs)
9/15/14--- (173lbs)
1/8/15---> 40-35-43 (179lbs)
2/08/15--------------176lbs
hhm6 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Posts by members, moderators and admins are not considered medical advice
and no guarantee is made against accuracy.


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Coping with skinny friends...*sigh* kassiebby1124 Weight Loss Support 11 03-15-2012 02:51 PM
RANT-Friends who "try" to help Andrbeck 20-Somethings 13 09-19-2011 01:48 PM
Anybody else annoyed with... provence 100 lb. Club 38 02-24-2009 01:20 AM
Lawl Losers And Friends - January 2007 Prazteam LA Weight Loss 1796 02-01-2007 01:40 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 01:47 PM.






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.2