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Please help...I'm self destructing

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Old 05-17-2009, 02:56 AM   #1
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Default Please help...I'm self destructing

Hello everyone,

I don't know what's gotten into me in the last two weeks, but I've been binge eating uncontrollably. I have been literally stuffing myself until I cannot put another piece of food in my stomach. Until I'm uncomfortably numb.

It all started as soon as finals were over - I felt like I could reward myself for being so good during finals - I ate on plan and tracked all my calories. One reward led to the slipperiest slope ever. I'm scared to weigh myself, but I'm sure I've put on 5 pounds or so.

I'm so upset and disheartened!!! I had so many big plans! I was going to work out every day while I was on vacation, I was going to watch what I eat. Instead I came back to LA to visit friends and family for the next ten days, and all I've been doing is bingeing in my mother's house. That's a typical reaction I have when I arrive here. I am now sitting on the couch STUFFED to the brim. I almost can't move.

Please help me. How can I stop this??
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Old 05-17-2009, 03:07 AM   #2
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That must be so discouraging, I'm so sorry to hear that!

You know, any time you're post-stress (a.k.a. finals), a lot of times thats when your body is actually weakest. They say the highest incidence of sickness among students is when finals are over, because they've been stressed for so long, and then the sudden downshift somehow affects them. I wonder if its the same with the body's desire for sweets or carbs or anything that may be your weakness.

But as cliche as it sounds, tomorrow is another day. Start again, move forward and get past the moments that make you feel like your goal is too far away to reach.

You need to get remotivated, you know? Whenever I feel the urge to grab something I don't need and eat it, sometimes I just get a glass of water and watch weight loss vlogs on youtube, or vids of people that inspire me to be healthier and thinner. You have to remember why you're doing this to begin with, or else that ice cream is gonna sound pretty darn good...TOO good.

It's a dangerous place to be, not knowing your purpose or forgetting the passion that was there before. Stay strong...your future self will thank you for it.
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Old 05-17-2009, 03:49 AM   #3
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It's never too late to get back on plan. I got side-tracked for 8 months, but I'm back. You can STILL have your plans, you just slipped up. Don't be discouraged.
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Old 05-17-2009, 07:23 AM   #4
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I don't really have any advice except to second that you can stop, right now, just make the decision - you have the power!
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Old 05-17-2009, 10:45 AM   #5
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Maybe if you can at first aim to eat anything you want, but just paying attention to when you are full, and stopping then. You want cake? go for it, just don't stuff yourself. Then slowly throughout the week try to switch some of the choices to healthier ones. I just finished my finals as well, and it is a very common thing for me usually after finals to want to go to my parents' house and eat. It is a rough time. Good luck, you can do it.
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Old 05-17-2009, 05:36 PM   #6
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When I read the whole part about you going to your mom's after finals and just totally letting go... it totally struck a bell in my head because I totally used to do the same thing. After a really rough time, I'd go to my grandma's just smash for the week. It'd be insane how I'd eat... we're talkin tons of pizza, mexican food, Dairy Queen, you name it! And considering I had a terrible life at home with the parents.... every other weekend at my grandparents turned into some crazy stuff! And it later followed me into life...

And, I realized, the reason why I did it... I was so stressed out from my home life that I went to the one place that comforted me and made me feel safe and happy again... and all that food because comfort food to add onto that feeling of safety and contentment.

Which, of course, led to worse habits (and a lot more weight) later on in life. Once again I live with my grandma because she wasn't doing too well living on her own anymore so I moved her in with me..... but now I'm strict with her. No cooking for me except on my off diet days, and no offering me food, etc. And you know? It's worked. I think you just gotta realize what you're doing, why you're doing it, and work to not allow that to happen anymore.
"Courage is being scared to death - but saddling up anyway." - John Wayne

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My Newest Goal: Lose 2011's Gained Stress Weight & Get Back to my Lowest Weight in Time for my Dec' 11 Vacation!!
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Old 05-18-2009, 03:44 AM   #7
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Maybe commit to tomorrow eating a nice big green salad with chicken in it for dinner. And to drink more water than you have recently.

And then the next day, commit to another "light" but filling dinner, as well as a healthier lunch, like a hummus pita stuffed with veggies and a tall glass of (you guessed it) water (on the rocks!)

These little commitments will give you confidence that you aren't so far gone, and naturally you'll get that motivation and desire back, and you'll be back on the right track in no time.

I have seriously derailed this weekend, but this sort of goal-setting really helps me get back on track, so that's exactly what I've done- I even wrote a note and stuck it to the fridge to remind myself of my little goals this week.
Breastfeeding, baby wearing, hubby snugglin', healthy eating, hard working, motherhood loving 20-something!

Losing the baby weight! 211 was my weight at the end of my pregnancy, I started my pregnancy at 183. Let's see that FIRST goal!!
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