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Out of Control

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Old 05-07-2009, 01:18 AM   #1
Busy Mommy
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Default Out of Control

I was gonna post a blog on Myspace but then I realized that no one would really understand like you guys do.

I have done great. Starting at 218 lbs I am now 184. I have lost inches like crazy and dropped about 5 sizes. I'm working with a personal trainer and can totally feel my muscle developing. I can see the definition in my arms and legs now......

But I'm getting tired of all of it. I'm tired of giving up Cokes. I'm tired of not being able to eat what I really want.....a big *** burger, cheese fries, chocolate cake...... Why does looking good have to suck so damn bad? I mean it's not fair. I'm tired of working so hard at this.

I'm cheating more and more. I went from having no will power, to a little, to being able to turn anything down without a problem. Now I can't stop eating the bread at the restaurant I work at. I'm ordering pizza. I'm ordering food at work. I'm sneaking regular cokes. It's like I know it's wrong and I'm gonna regret it but I don't care. I haven't really gained weight either. My numbers on the scale have remained the same.

I just feel like I'm slipping. And I'm afraid I'm gonna gain the weight back.

What do I do?
Memorial Day Challenge:

My Birthday Challange:
16.5 of 44 pounds lost

My Ultimate Goal:

REACHED: Mini Goal 1: ONEderland by 02.25.09 Mini Goal 2: Lean Green Machine Challenge Mini Goal 3: No longer "obese" by 03.21.09 Mini Goal 4: CC Easter Challenge

Mini Goal 5: Memorial Day Challenge Mini Goal 6: Lose 44 lbs by 06.30.09 (My birthday)

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Old 05-07-2009, 01:33 AM   #2
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have you completely cut those things out from your diet? Maybe you should allow yourself tastes of these things regularly. Or perhaps a "cheat" day would work for you


"If you want to get thin, stick the mars bar up your a** and get a rottweiler to chase you down the street"- Billy Connolly
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Old 05-07-2009, 02:07 AM   #3
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I agree, give yourself a cheat day! I hope the feeling passes for you!
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Old 05-07-2009, 02:19 AM   #4
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I agree with the other posters about just letting it happen once in a while, but when you are done with getting it out of your system, maybe try food journaling. I am actually going to have to get more strict myself starting tomorrow morning with my food journal. I get back on course after every stray by tracking food and my morning weight.
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Old 05-07-2009, 02:56 AM   #5
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Nicki, what kind of diet plan are you on? Can't you plan for those things and work them in? Cutting something out completely is never going to be sustainable so its better to have a plan for those things you miss and believe me then there is no worry or guilt attached.

I don't believe in "cheat" days as I think every day we should be accountable. Do you journal or track your days? Not just food, but everything? You may want to do this as it can help pinpoint when you are feeling most "not caring". There are factors like your hunger scale, less protein one day and more carbs, did you drink alcohol, are you tired, is it TOM? When you can look at the bigger picture it sort of helps explain why you may be having cravings.

Or maybe you are afraid of being a success? Maybe that sounds silly but it could be possible. Do you have a voice in your head saying negative things about you still even though you've done such a great job so far?

It is hard work, but wasn't it hard on you being overweight? Which hard would you rather have? We are not like others who are naturally thin and don't have to work or even think about this stuff, we are different and the sooner we accept that, the happier we'll be.

Don't be like me and throw away all your hard work and effort- hang in there and show the complacency and negativity who the boss is!
~Renée (do I seem familiar to you?? )

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Old 05-07-2009, 03:43 AM   #6
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Don't give up!

I would think about writing your eating habits down as others have suggested, it works for me! But you can't really completely cut out those greasy, sugary foods from your diet otherwise you'll just doom yourself to repeat failure. As other have mentioned, have a 'cheat' day. I hate calling them cheat days though, it makes it sound like a bad thing when I think they are actually really necessary so you don't go insane. Plan these things into your life, don't let them become habits again.

Or you can simply go the alternate route and find recipes of low fat low cal versions of the things you like to eat! That way, no guilt and no expanding waistline!
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Old 05-07-2009, 11:55 AM   #7
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Nikki your post read like my life right now.

I am so tired with all hard work it is to lose weight and keep healthy some peopel just dont realize the sacrafice. Why cant I just have a body that even remotely plays well with others. I am exhausted trying to just keep up with life right now much less with the energy to lose weight too.

I havent totally any food or drink out of my diet because I think when you do that it only makes you want it. However instead of coke i drink diet coke its the little things. Maybe you could try that.
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Old 05-07-2009, 12:20 PM   #8
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Absolutely never deprive yourself of the things you love!!! That equals a diet, and that is simply NOT the right course of action! Everything is fine in moderation. It is definitely the lil things that count!!! I love love love love pizza, and my love for that is the reason i got as heavy as i was, but there is absolutely no way I'm never eating it again! Don't let food be the boss of you!! Have what you want, just dont have it on a daily basis, and when you are at home, find ways to make what you like more healthy! I think if you do that, you'll find yourself not really needing to "cheat" as much! PLUS your body is responding to you, if you leave out all the stuff you love, it goes into it's temper tantrum and says OH YEAH, well FINE i'm not going to starve myself, I'll eat these protein enriched thingys u like to call MUSCLE!

I am my own worst Enemy.
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Old 05-07-2009, 12:34 PM   #9
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Yeah, I agree with DanSin & co. - you can't deprive yourself like that.

Just figure out a way to treat yourself. For me, I'm really hard on myself during the week, but on the weekends I like to splurge - within reason. It also helps me get through the week, knowing on Saturday I CAN have chicken mcnuggets (and boy do I).
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Old 05-07-2009, 12:42 PM   #10
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another one agreeing here... you should allow those types of treats. Saying you'll never be able to eat X food ever again is going to make that food feel 10 times more appetizing and harder to resist.

I allow for one cheat meal a week. During that meal, I can eat whatever the heck I want... burgers, pizza, fish and chips... whatever. And I enjoy it, and I never feel guilty about it because it is on plan. There is no reason that you can't do the same! Just eat lighter for the 2 other meals on that cheat day. Maybe you'll be a little over your calories... let's say it's 500 calories over that one day. Okay, no big deal, it's not going to break your weight loss. You need well over 3000 calories to equal a lb. And, the good thing is, you won't feel deprived.... so you won't feel like you are going crazy every day. There's a big difference between an allowed cheat once a week and cheating multiple times a week and falling off the wagon.

Don't give up. You have come so far. Make a list of all the reasons why you still want this. Take pictures of yourself and appreciate the progress you have made. you can do this, and we're here to support you!

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Old 05-07-2009, 12:54 PM   #11
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Totally agree with the others.... I have a Dr. Pepper at least two or three times a week because I work it into my calorie allowance. Sure it's not as healthy as water but I've done the rabbit food diet before and it just leads to a big crash and burn. Secondly I think you've got to give yourself some slack. Messing up one or two days is allowed. This weekend we are celebrating my birthday along with Mother's Day with my family...that includes a Mother's Day brunch on Sunday with loads of delicious food! I would be so sad and feeling rather grumpy if I went in with the attitude that I couldn't eat any of the "good" food. Rather, my plan is to load up on salad, and get one of those smaller plates (like the dessert plates) for the really yummy stuff. Then I don't feel like I'm depriving myself or not allowing myself to have any fun and celebrate my birthday.

Like MoonRabbit, I seem to have one cheat day a week.... usually it's Friday evenings when DH and I go out. That means for breakfast and lunch, though, I eat lighter, smaller meals and then don't worry about what I'm eating out that night. It has always worked out in my favor!
GOAL!! 80+ lbs less of me and 13.1 miles later... I'm still running!

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Old 05-10-2009, 11:52 PM   #12
Busy Mommy
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Thanks guys so much. Here's what I do. I'm a calorie counter. I create a menu each week with my breakfast, lunch, dinner and 3 snacks. That's my food journaling. It's a computerized menu so I highlight the food when I eat it. If I eat something else I change it to keep track of my calorie allotment.

I do really well with it. It's really when I work at the restaurant that it gets so hard. It's really hard to eat my dinner when I get hungry because we are so busy. So I usually don't get to eat it. So I'll shove a bite of bread in my mouth because I feel like I'm about to throw up. Then there are sometimes I'm at home about to fix dinner and I look at what I'm supposed to eat and think I just want pizza, Chinese, a burger....enter your favorite food here. LOL

I do need to start being stricter. I'm not only doing this to feel better about myself and the way I look. I'm also doing it for health reasons. So many health problems run in my family and being overweight will only help them along. Sometimes it really is hard. Especially if I'm having a really bad day. All I can think is "screw it". LOL

Thanks guys!!!!!
Memorial Day Challenge:

My Birthday Challange:
16.5 of 44 pounds lost

My Ultimate Goal:

REACHED: Mini Goal 1: ONEderland by 02.25.09 Mini Goal 2: Lean Green Machine Challenge Mini Goal 3: No longer "obese" by 03.21.09 Mini Goal 4: CC Easter Challenge

Mini Goal 5: Memorial Day Challenge Mini Goal 6: Lose 44 lbs by 06.30.09 (My birthday)

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Old 05-11-2009, 11:30 AM   #13
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Recommit yourself and start over! I will admit that if I want to fit in something I really want then I work it into my points for the day. Look into alternative ways to fix your favorite foods too. Believe it or not they can be just as tasty as the grease laden crap I love my food It has to taste good or I don't want it!

As for being busy at work....try to find something else than that bite of bread to pop in your mouth maybe a bite or two of your dinner you are supposed to be eating If you can't do that then maybe look into eating it before your shift or fit in a small satisfying meal before your shift so you can eat your dinner after you get off. It truly doesn't matter what time you eat no matter what the myth is about eating after a certain time. Your body will burn it regardless.

Oh yeah and get the term "cheat" out of your vocabulary as far as eating goes If you keep thinking about it that way and you are not really at peace with what you are doing it'll just drag you down further until you quit.

"The most exciting, and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself."

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Old 05-11-2009, 11:52 AM   #14
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Would it work for you if you brought a Luna bar or something to work? Say you're working the dinner shift, 3pm to 11pm or something (I have no idea what your hours are, just using it as an example) and you know you get hungry around 6, but it's too busy to take a break until 8, plan to eat a snack at 6 to tide you over, so you aren't tempted to graze on the restaurant food. Work it into your calories for the day.

Started on March 13, 2009

First Mini-Goal: Reach 264 pounds Done! 5/14/9
Next Mini-Goal: Reach 238 pounds
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