[barbygirl43]

OK. I've stayed away long enough. I haven't even visited the site until today. I kept trying to come back to get my life in order and to start losing weight again, but just wasn't committed to it. NOW I AM!!!!
I stepped on the scales for the first time in a long time friday and I'm back up to 273.5 (which means I've gained about 14 pounds over the last 3-4 months!)
Although I still don't have a plan to follow, what I am doing now is monitoring everything I eat using Fitday.com to keep track of all the food. I started it on Thursday and what I've found out is that my calories are under control, however my fat intake is way too high. I'm staying around 2000 calories but am having over 50 grams of fat a day!!!! No wonder I've been gaining weight. I also noticed that I'm having problems with night eating again. That's where all my fat and calories are coming from, but I've been starving when I get home.
On a positive note, I changed jobs a couple of weeks ago. I'm so less stressed out about work (I quit my job in September but told them I would stay until I found a new one) I'm with the same company but at a sister paper. I've moved back in with my parents (did that Oct. 1) and still live in Holdenville. I plan on moving to Eufaula either at the first of December or the first of January. It's an hour drive there and another hour drive back home and so far the drive has been doing me well. (I'm a thinker and analyzer and what better time than an hour alone in the car to resolve feelings). The down side to the drive is that I'm exhausted when I get home and I can't get up early enough to get in any exercise. So today (Sunday) I'm going to start exercising and I'm going to call one of my former co-workers here and see if she wants to walk with me in the evenings. I know I can get this weight under control and become the healthy woman inside I've always seen.
For the next couple of weeks I'm going to continue to just see what all I'm eating while making minor changes (adding more low-fat snack breaks in my work day) until I can get a plan that works for me.
It feels good already to be back among friends who are on the same road as me.
Good luck everyone.
Dawnyal

[1fralick]

BG 43 A huge HUG to YOU !!!!!

YOu have been missed!!!

I am so Glad to see your post. That fitday thiing is pretty cool.
Just Take it a day at a time.

[spartanMOM]

Hi Dawnyal ,

That was an empowering post for me to read! I remember back in the spring when I was going to the gym. Before I started, I felt like I had no energy to even consider going. But after awhile, the exercise gave me more energy, rather then sucking from my low supply. It's amazing the positive effects in can have. I went off plan for about... hmm.. 7-8 months(), and today will be my first day back at the gym. I'm sooo looking forward to it.

Anyhow, I didn't mean to turn this into a post about myself, but I wanted to let you know I'm proud to hang out with people who have such a great attitude like yours in here. It sure makes this long long struggle a lil bit bearable.

Have a nice day and I look forward to getting to know you more!

Michelle

[Jenniffer]

Hey barbygirl...thank you! Thank you for this inspirational post today, I needed it. Always have a hard time on Monday mornings, and this gave me this push that I desperatly needed.
Like me, you have had many many changes in your life in the last couple of months. It's no wonder that we've both gained. Looks like we gained pretty much the same amount of weight too. Let's not beat ourselves up..let's just do it again.
While getting our lives straightened out, and figuring out what is best for us, our weight was put on the back burner. Looks like were both ready to concetrate on ourselves once again.

I am here for you..rooting you on. We can do this, despite anything that is going on in our personal lives.

[Sandi]

Hello there!! I am so glad to see you back!! Have missed you!!! Posting on this board does make a difference! I've noticed that for me weighing all the time seems to keep me a little more honest. When I don't weigh, I can act like there isn't a problem. We are right about the same weight, so we can do this together!!! One day at a time!!!

[barbygirl43]

Thank you all for the warm welcome back. It's great to be back and I'm trying desperately to get my eating back in control. That has been a huge struggle for me today, but I know I can do it. I tried to give up my caffeine too (but I had a horrible headache at work and caved and got me a pop on the drive home).
The drive home was lovely. Everyone asks me how I can stand the hour drive to and from work and all I can say is, the sunsets have been beautiful and no 2 have been alike
Thanks again for all your continued support.
Dawnyal

[Mello1]

''

Well, I finally faced the music on Saturday (actually, I faced the scale). I can honestly say that I've never been as heavy as I am right now. All I want right now is to just get back to where I was just a few short months ago. I've never gain weight back as fast as I did -- it was quite shocking to me. I'm not telling myself that I'm am trying once again. I just can't do that anymore. I'm telling myself to JUST DO IT. No excuses, no more analogies, no more woulda coulda shouldas. I messed up, big time. I've wasted time and set myself back by at least 6 months. Those are just my facts that I have to face and deal with. This wasn't just a setback for me -- somewhere along the way I just gave up. I didn't feel like I was; eating all of those yummy things felt good at the time. But now, I'm huffing just to walk and I have knees of an 80-year old, and I'm just 43. I just don't want to live the rest of my life like this, because I know that it's only going to get worse if I don't take control of myself. I admit that I'm not perfect and when it comes to losing weight, I'm certainly no expert. I admit to myself (and all of the Internet world) that I need help and motivation and support to lose this weight. I thought that I was so strong and brave and smart, that I could do this all by myself. I was wrong. I need help.

There. I finally said it. Okay.... Okay!

Having said all of that, I am in Day 2 of my program and I'm getting on well. I'm journalling, drinking my water and I'm exercising. Before I re-started my program, I started doing some simple (well not so simple for me) yoga, and it is really helping me and my body. I'm hoping to gain a different prospective on things, as well as to balance my yin with my yang.

I'm taking the time to write this out for all to see as my motivating factors for me to get the job done at long last. Thanks for putting up with my vent tonight.

Melody/Mello1

308.6/was 272 just 4 months ago/150

[GetReal]

"I'm staying around 2000 calories but am having over 50 grams of fat a day!!!! No wonder I've been gaining weight."

You finally figured it out! It's the fat in food that makes us fat!

[teach93]

Glad to see that you are back!!. I am also back and was carrying some extra, "extra" weight but am trying to get back on track again. I am working through some of the overeater's anon literature. However, this weekend was rough, I decided I could eat like a normal person without journaling everything. Wrong!!! Now I am back to my journal and food plan, and especially important the next couple of months, abstaining from what I know sets me off. Those negative thoughts are very sneaky critters!!!

Elaine

297/269/199 first goal