Hullo, Everyone.
You probably don't remember me, but I have posted a few times and I tend to lurk most of the time. Just wanted to post a quick update. Work is still boring. I was hired to be a technical associate, but am just a glorified secretary with nothing to do...yay. My husband is still wonderful, but his job is stressing him out too. My diet is...well...not so good. I am so frustrated, and depressed. The diet center I joined (already paid for 26 weeks of it) basically didn't tell me how hard this diet was until I had paid for it, and had been doing the "prep" phase for 3 days. My entire life revolves around my diet. I hate it! We can't go anywhere or do anything without taking into consideration where we can eat, or did I take my pills, or how long will we be gone because I need to make sure I don't eat past a certain time...
We go for lunch sometimes at a burger joint (I get a grilled chicken salad - no dressing, no cheese, no bread, no carrots). Went there today...there was this thin, beautiful woman walking around with a big honkin burger, fries, and a huge cup of coke. She looked at me...looked at my salad...gave me a smug look and sashayed off. I wanted to twist her head off. I hate going out in public. If we go into a clothing store the sales people look at me like "What is SHE doing here?" Everywhere we go I see thin, beautiful women walking around like they own the place. I guess I'm just depressed. I'm on this horribly hard diet and the weight is creeping off...sometimes not even coming off. I just want to order a pizza and eat the whole flippin thing. Anyway...sorry for ranting. Just wanted to update everyone who has sent me a pm and I didn't respond. I'm just feeling a little down.
I know what that feels like. But
We all have to begin and end somewhere.
I would still hold my head up high at the fact that you didnt have a burger.
Never let anyone elses looks comments hurt you. No one can hurt yourself as much as you.
Theres tough times totally. Its not all a basket of roses we all know that. But picking the roses one at a time is how we get to making ourselves love ourselves for those accomplishments. So pick a rose and smell it and know you earned it.
You didn't say, but I'm wondering why you're sticking to a diet you hate. I know you paid for it already, but sometimes it's worth losing those "sunk costs" to walk away and do something that will work better for you.
Run Away. You need to find a way of eating that suits you and that you can live with forever. This does not seem to be that plan. You will only prolong your heartache by trying to stick with something that in incompatible with your life.
That said, no matter what plan you follow, your life is going to revolve around food and exercise for a while. It's hard in the beginning, and requires some effort and determination. After a while it will require less concentration. You will learn new habits and some things will become automatic, and not require such mental energy. (At least this was the case for me!)
Wow. You all are right. It was a lot of money we paid, but it's not worth me being miserable for those 26 weeks. So...I'm going to do this my way. I'm going to make mistakes, and it will take me longer, but I WILL hit my goal. I have revised my ticker to show my true high weight (when I REALLY started trying to lose weight), and my true goal. Anyhoo...thanks guys. I needed those comments.
Hey, good for you! I just know you can find a plan that will work without making you feel like you're in a straightjacket every minute. Yes, you'll have to go without certain foods in certain quantities--that's just how it is! But it doesn't have to be constant torture.
Now, I want you to turn around that incident in the burger joint by visualizing it this way: The thin woman with the burger and fries had formerly weighed 200 pounds, and she had dieted for 14 months to get to where she is now. The burger and fries is her once-a-month treat where she can just enjoy the food. She saw you and what you were eating, and she thought, "I know just how she feels." Her smile wasn't really smugness, it was a clumsy attempt at showing you that she felt friendly toward you. I hope that this little story will help you feel differently about what happened, whether you believe it or not.
Checking in
Anyway...sorry for ranting. Just wanted to update everyone who has sent me a pm and I didn't respond. I'm just feeling a little down.
