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-   -   Just when you think you are doing everything right.... (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/100-lb-club/89909-just-when-you-think-you-doing-everything-right.html)

Foreverhopefull 07-24-2006 06:48 AM

Just when you think you are doing everything right....
 
you find out that 5 days out of the month, everything you work for is ruined.

My family is all obese and we gain weight easy, so we have made it our family vow that we will teach my 2 yold how to eat healthy right from the start.

I'm not saying she never get's sweets or junk food but 90% of her meals are healthy.

This weekend we had her 2nd birthday party at her father's (my sister and my niece's father were seperated (in the process of a divorce) by the time my niece was born...less than a year after they married) mother's place.

We have confirmed that the whole family is white trailler trash...I think that Rednecks would be ashamed to be seen around them. They give Orange crush as juice, they let her drink Pepsi, eat chocolates and etc... all day long. The 8 yold cousin took my niece's...again, she's 2... hand and showed her how to masturbate a neigbour's dog. Her play ground consist of a completed rusted swing set , a sand mount surrounded by old wood, rusted-broken down ATVs and other metal parafanellia (sp?).

My niece hates to be dirty, well, she was absolutly filthy and when she asked for a wet toilette to clean herself...she was told to use her clothes to wipe her hands and clean herself.

I know we have to be tolerant in life but when everything you do to raise a beautifull, polite and well behaved healthy girl and you see all your hard work go down the drain within 5 days per month. That kid eats nothing but junk for those 5 days. If she picked pudding for breakfast, that's what she would eat...no questions asked. We know that she eats everything fried and fatty when she's there, there is very little fruits or veges served all weekend.

You would think that when they discused the visits, my sister had made it extremely clear that she did not wish to feed, or have served, unhealthy foods because of our family's weight issues. He had totaly agreed...I guess that went the same way everything else he ever said went.

My sister is supposed to talk to her lawyer this week and discuss his rights. He's been a dead beat dad since day one and the only reason he has any rights to have his daughter sleep over is my sister fighted for it .

thistoo 07-24-2006 07:58 AM

My sister is a step-mom and her stepson's home life is less than ideal, so she struggles with this issue as well, but nothing like the degree to which your niece is suffering.

It sounds to me like your sister might have a good case for neglect charges, which should be enough to terminate his rights, or at least force him to have supervised visitation. I hope her lawyer is good at his job. Best to you both.

mezmerize 07-24-2006 08:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Foreverhopefull
The 8 yold cousin took my niece's...again, she's 2... hand and showed her how to masturbate a neigbour's dog.

This rasies a HUGE RED FLAG!!! I know there is unhealtly eating and play area's but this must be looked into!!!!

Jen415 07-24-2006 10:17 AM

I agree with Mez--not only is it inappropriate, but it can be a sign of sexual abuse on the cousin's part.

PLEASE don't let this slide by!!

AquaChick 07-24-2006 11:16 AM

:( Oh my gosh. The dog thing is sexual abuse as far as I'm concerned. If someone put a childs hand on anything in a sexual manner-- :mad: :mad: :mad:

The child is too innocent to know they were asked (or forced) to do something violating and indecent. :( Poor baby. Why would she need to know that? Why would they want to see her do that? What kind of a person thinks of doing that to begin with? It wouldn't cross a normal persons mind at all. Someone is showing indecent things- either in the house, or they are around an outsider that is showing how to do certain things.

She has to get outta there.This goes beyond food. My blood is boiling at the person that did that to the 8 year old, who in turn had the aby do it.

buckettgirl 07-24-2006 01:32 PM

Wow... i'm speechless.
If this is the place she goes to for 5 days every month (if I understood right), WHY???
What mother in her right mind would send her child to place like this?? Nevermind the food habits - keep that 8 year old's hands off of her! And that she clearly has no *safe* play area... omg... How trashed is this house??? If there were children living there, would they be taken away? If you cannot answer this question with a resounding NO way, not ever; then this little girl should NOT be there.
Get her out before she has any longterm memories of that place or those people, and certainly before she becomes abused (if she hasn't been already).
This has very little to do with food. This is her life, her safety, and her wellbeing. Kids need father figures, but people like that just don't count.

Foreverhopefull 07-25-2006 05:29 AM

My sister discussed the issue with her lawyer and she agreed that that the cousin should never be around my niece again and there is a strong possibility that the weekend rights will be revoked...but this has to go through the courts first.

My sister also talked to the father, she told him that she will take my niece to his mother's place (yep, they all live together in a trailler) at his next visit and if that place is not cleaned up or this cousin is there, she will be going home immediatly and his rights will be denied until further notice. She also told him that he could take $5 for a few boxes of sugar free juice instead of giving a 2yold soft drinks. She told him that he shaped up or the last weekend was the last he would see of my niece. She actualy have more than that weekend as grounds to revoke his rights....he has not payed a penny of child support in 2 years. My sister has to provide for both of them on less than $400 per week while paying all of his debts (he busted all her credit cards, stole tons of money from her account and spent the money that she gave him to pay some bills on drugs).

We learned that the little girl saw a porno flick a few weeks ago and has been obsesed with that ever since ...her parents are too stupid and lazy to take the time to sit down and talk to her about sex instead of just leting her act in such a rude way.

It's just a beautifull family!:devil:

buckettgirl 07-25-2006 08:20 AM

Your sister shouldn't take her daughter there at all! Allowing a child to see a porn is child abuse. And the 8 year old being around shouldn't be the only concern...someone taught/did to him things that obviously corrupted him. Who is the corrupter?
If that were my child, she wouldn't know who her father is...especially when he isn't paying anything. He isn't going to do anything that he tells your sister. Forget about trying to get good food habits, and GET HER OUT OF THE SITUATION. Well, with people like that, we both know they won't get anything cleaned up in time. Your sister needs to stick to her guns and stop giving in to the father. There is a chance NOW to save that little girl from a life of misery and abuse.

midwife 07-25-2006 08:56 AM

Both the 8 yo and the 2 yo and any other children need to be saved from there. Please call Child Protective Services. Someone there is evil and children need to be protected.

AquaChick 07-25-2006 11:04 AM

No way should children be exposed to pornography. That is too much information for children and it is as far as I'm concerned sexual abuse (mentally, they now know sex. They have seen the act performed) Who knows if something has been done to the children sexually- in a physical way.

I won't get into details, but from personal experience, this is a bad start. The 8 year old is probably never going to be able to forget anything he has seen. Images like that tend to "burn" into one's mind.

This is so so sad and they need to be saved from that ****. I am happy to see some steps are being taken, but I think that removal is neccesary and the 8 year old needs a lifeline too. It really isn't his fault, but if he stays in that type of enviornment things could develop into an ugly mess for that child.

I'm so concerned for them. :(

mezmerize 07-25-2006 11:41 AM

Midwife and Aqua said it all get those children out. This is so sad!


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