What the heck is she talking about?
This thought popped into my head last night when lying in bed with my fiance. He likes to sleep with his arms around me at night, to be honest he likes to have his arms around me all the time
. I get so self conscious when he puts his arms around me at night that eventually, after he falls asleep, I push his hands off me. I get paranoid that his arms/hands are right on my belly (my nemesis) and the thought that he will somehow all of a sudden realize that I'm big and leave me. Completely irrational right? I'm not saying that is an instant thought that I have but I dwell on the issue so much and it builds and drives me crazy. Sometimes when I'm putting on makeup, doing my hair, or just looking in the mirror (I'm cute, so shoot me
), he'll come up behind me and put his arms around my waist (or where one will be *positive thinking*) and I immediately put his hands on my hips (which I lurrvve!) instead... I think this all comes from my tummy being such a sore spot for me. But last night as I was about to throw his hands off me, I got to thinking about all the intimacy I miss out on because of my insecurities and left him where he was.
My weight loss has had its ups and downs since I started in October. In November, I decided to take measurements monthly to maybe be able to see some progress when the scale wasn't helping. Well, this morning I took my measurements again and guess what! Progress! I've lost 2.5 inches EACH from my bust, chest, and abdomen (yep, the gut). So in one month I've lost 7.5 inches total and in two months lost 13 pounds. I guess it's a little easier than it used to be for him to hug me and hold me. Talk about a motivator. Here's to even better numbers in the future.
P.S. Please don't misconstrue my posts as implying that I ridicule myself. It's not that. I just wanted to comment on a silly insecurity of mine to maybe hear some of ya'lls. I have good self-esteem that mingles with the awareness that I can work on myself to be even better. The title of this thread (So you want to hug a hippo) just popped in my head, it is not intended to reflect my feelings for myself rather is intended as an eyecatcher. Anywho, thanks for listening!