Yep it's strange to think of it that way but your right. A drug addict would be really looked down on by some if they failed but with food it's just food. So there is not as much condemnation.
As far as the battle ending. I don't see that happening sorry to say. I can say that it is well worth the fight though. It still amazes me how my body feels and looks. I will fight the rest of my life to keep thin if that is what it takes. I don't want to go back to the way I felt.
Good for you Howie.. sounds like you have the right attitude. Maybe as dieters should we accept slip ups.. just as part of life? The important thing is that we get back on the horse? Food is not a drug for us.. more like a nasty mother in law?
Well, Howie, in case you haven't figured it out yet I thought I would throw out just one more, "you aren't alone." I have reached my initial goal of 135. I have not struggled much lately but I certainly have in the past and I most definately expect to again. I will say that the more weight I lose the harder it is when I lose a battle with food. At the begining of my program there just wasn't much at stake. But now, when I give in and overeat not only do I feel physically ill but I am also overcome by fear. In the bottom of my heart I know this is it for me. I am manageing my weight and refuse to let myself fall back into my old lifestyle in spite of the occasional slip up. Still, every indulgence is a reminder that I could end up right back where I started. And that scares the stew out of me.
I try to keep everything in perspective. One meal is a drop in the bucket compared to the thousands of others I'll eat for the rest of my life. Like you, I've had to accept that there is not an on /off switch and so I'm stuck with being hyper aware of my food choices from here on out. It isn't a perfect situation but it is far better than living a life of obesity again.
Addictions, no matter to what are evil creatures. My hubby quit drinking 9 years ago, 3 months before he met me. I truly admire him for staying sober. Wouldn't say he is an alcoholic, but certainly a serious problem drinker. The smell actually makes him ill these days. So, good for you Matt. I know 'second hand" how destructive it can be. Shannon- I can't believe how strong and committed you are. WTG!!!
Howie, hang in there. You've come SO far. We all have a lot to learn from you.
Have any of you watched "supersize me"? Friends who have say it made them believe they will never again eat fast food. Having said that, they already have pretty healthy habits. Its on my "to watch list" though.
Still, every indulgence is a reminder that I could end up right back where I started. And that scares the stew out of me.
OMG, this scares me everyday!! I have lost before, only to gain it back and more. The thought of going back to my SW again makes me shudder.... and I'm only 40 pounds away from my it -- I hope to get a long way further
And yet, we'd be foolish not to think about it. I don't know what the actual stats are on what % of people gain weight back, but I'm willing to bet it's really high! Just look at how people disappear from this board... some return, but many don't, and a lot of those who don't come back gained some or all of the weight back. I only have to look at my own past to see how.
So on the one hand, one bad meal is only one bad meal, and one bad day is only one bad day... they won't hurt us in the long run. Very true. But are we all scared that it ISN'T just one meal? I know that's my fear.
Right now I'm running with the notion that this IS for life, and therefore slipups are okay, but that this IS for life, and big slipups cannot therefore be everyday occurances.
I think some "neverfats" worry about this too... but I wonder how frequently??
Howie, not to sound redundant but it will be a struggle for the rest of our lives. We can not "quit" cold turkey, unfortunately. I think the difference for everyone on the forum, is that they (we) are all reaching out for help, whereas before (at least) I have would struggle alone, only to allow the weight to gain back (and then some). You do you best, and some days you win and some days you lose, but with self awareness, in the end you will win the war. Let's gor for it everyone!!!
Howie i have to say our eating habits seem to be very similar, my weekness is the wendy's tripple burger combo.. Just reading that you had one makes me want it more - what a crazy fight.
Sherri I have watched it and am going to get the DVD so I can show others. It is a great movie to watch. It did help me to stay away from fast food for the most part but when you got that battle going on in your mind on the way to the drive thru your not thinking to much about anything else.
Sorry for the food porn Nash. That is why I hate to tell Kimberley when I have eaten something bad. I know it can trigger the same reaction in her. So I usally wait until the next day. Funny pizza is my favorite food but burgers are my biggest comfort food. I'm glad it's not pizza because I can still enjoy it without going crazy.
Have any of you watched "supersize me"? Friends who have say it made them believe they will never again eat fast food. Having said that, they already have pretty healthy habits. Its on my "to watch list" though.
I highly recommmend Super Size Me to anybody whose eaten at a fast-food restaurant! My teenaged son watched it in his high-school health class, and now he understands why I discourage him from eating there. Health issues aside, there are plenty of social and economic reasons not to eat fast food. It didn't change my eating habits drastically and immediately, but it added to the repertoire of knowledge I have about the industry. I also recommend reading Fast Food Nation: The Dark Side of the All-American Meal by Eric Schlosser and Fat Land : How Americans Became the Fattest People in the World by Greg Critser. Between these three sources of media, I've gotten to the point where, when I eat fast food, I feel exploited. That puts a damper on enjoying a juicy burger.
I also recommend reading Fast Food Nation: The Dark Side of the All-American Meal by Eric Schlosser.
I found this book to be very disturbing and very eye-opening, too. If anyone out there wants to read Fast Food Nation, I'd be happy to drop my copy in the mail for the promise of its eventual return and/or future as a book to be passed on to the next person who wants to read it.
Ah, topic: I quit smoking two years ago and the days and weeks immediately following my last cigarette were much harder than the first days and weeks of my new healthy lifeplan. Now, I don't ever think of cigarettes (except to be bothered by them), but food is always there, sometimes as a pleasure, sometimes as a struggle. I wouldn't be surprised to learn that changing one's poor eating habits permanently requires the sort of intestinal fortitude, grace and determination that it takes to give up heroin.
LOL - Howie, can I tell you that even though I can totally sympathize with your struggle, I naughtily enjoyed your food porn? I'm imagining that food right now. God, it's good. I might need a cigarette after this!
I just saw this thread. *Sigh* I hear you, lover-friend of mine.
It is so discouraging sometimes, isn't it? I get so tired of having to watch ever little calorie and account for it, while some around me can eat just terribly and suffer no consequences (no readily obvious consequences, anyway).
But then I think of how far we've come, not just in losing weight, but in gaining understanding. I also am dreadfully fearful of gaining it back -- it's just somewhere I cannot go.
BELIVE ME-- Its no fun to let go and give in. I did this with my pregnancy and I can't seem to get back on track yet. I've gained all my loss back and I feel disgusting, and really angry with myself. I know in my heart, that I will eventually get back on the right track but, I let meyself go. After all that hard work and only being 8 lbs away from my ultimate goal--- this time last year. I could cry all day long. BUT I know that eventually, I'll get my act together and get with the program. You DON'T want to feel this way. You are so much better off staying on track-- and one bad meal wont hurt-- as long as one bad meal doesn't turn into 50 bad meals etc. ... Howie, you and kIm are such inspirations. Keep up the good work.
You can do it Gretchen. I know exactly what you are going though. I've been there too. You will find your niche again just keep trying. I miss seeing you around here. The place is not the same. You added so much to the site. You are one of the people that really helped me get going and I thank you for that. I always looked forward to your inspirational post.
Kimberley, we have each other so I know we are not going to let each other gain this weight back. So don't worry this feeling will get better and we will make it together.
Thanks everybody for your posts. It takes courage to just let it hang out there. I remember reading about a series of research studies that said the two hardest addictions to quit are food and cigarettes. They rated both of these as more difficult than heroin or alcohol !!!
You do you best, and some days you win and some days you lose, but with self awareness, in the end you will win the war. Let's gor for it everyone!!! 
