The stress and desire to procrastinate you are feeling with school is pretty normal. I am in college myself and have noticed that every quarter has a rhythm that is almost identical. Usually I start off with high energy which is usually gone in the first few weeks. Then it becomes plain grit and determination to get things done on time and get ready for tests. As you get toward the end you start pulling your hair out over finals and final projects and just when you are totally sick of it the class is over, thank God
I have enjoyed most of my classes but it does not keep the same cycle from happening. The thing that keeps me motivated is fear of failing. I may be bored to tears with a class and hate the assignments but fear will make me sit down and actually do the work to get a good grade.
The big secret is that everyone else feels the same way. That is why when you walking a college campus at mid term or finals time you can almost smell the fear and stress in the air. I have a pretty high GPA and my lab partners seem to think I am just naturally smart. That is certainly not the case. I am just more afraid of failing than they are and will do what it takes to keep that from happening.
Here is how I manage to get things done. First at the start of the quarter I put all my test dates or due dates for papers in my day planner. If you don't have one I suggest you get on or write them on a calender were you will see it everyday. Putting it near your computer or bathroom mirror is good because you can't avoid seeing it. By doing this it is easy to see where you are at and when things are due. The most important thing is to promise yourself not to cram for tests or to get assignments done. If you are anything like me I do rotten work when I am under too much stress. With my science classes I need to study everyday because the material is tough and you can't take it in all at once. If I fail to study during the week I make up for it on the weekends. With social science classes I start assignments at least a week before they are due unless it is a big project. The social science come pretty easy for me so I usually don't have to do the daily grind like you get with math and science. All that will vary with where you are at personally. You may need more time and you need to find what your level is. Once you have figured that out you can know when you need to get to work and when you can let up. I make up my mind before I begin a class what grade I want to get. For social science class I usually aim for an A. I know what I need to do and the amount of time it will take to earn that grade. Science and math I expect to earn at least a B but try and shoot for an A. Those both come very hard for me and a B is actually a major achievement. I personally am not willing to make myself totally insane trying to get an A even if others around me are. I don't plan to transfer to Harvard so I don't worry about a B on my transcripts. Where I am tough on myself is that I refuse to earn anything lower than a B. I know people who feel that C grades are ok but I know for me that a C means I did not make an effort.
The thing to remember is that you are not alone and stop beating yourself up for not starting your assignment sooner. Being stressed and under pressure is part of being in college. Through the years I have been in school a long time and I can tell you for a fact it never changes. It is normal for you to feel the way you do and it doesn't make you a bad person or even a bad student. It makes you a normal student and shows you are being way too hard on yourself. All you can do is get caught up and try to stay there. If you are stuck with the essay you are doing now I would be glad to try and help you if you want to send a PM. At the school I attend there is a writing lab and writing tutors in the tutorial center. Both of those options can be very helpful and it may be a resource you have not taken advantage of. Don't be shy about asking for help or getting a tutor. I never would have made it though my math classes without a lot of time in the tutorial center. I always discovered that many people from my classes were there with the same questions. They also tended to be the better students in the class because they were motivated to get help with the material. Besides I also made a lot of new friends there because we got to know each other trying to master the material. A lot of those people I have stayed friends with even after the class was over.