I am so depressed. My husband usually does the shopping lately and making the coffee in the morning due to my stupid leg which is still in severe pain (i have an orthopedic appointment on November 15th thank goodness) Anyway the pain is so bad its incapacitating and its upsetting because i want to exercise while dieting and this is really slowing me down.
Anyway I get up and he says there is no coffee when i ask for a cup, he said he didn't realize there was no coffee, i asked him who is the one that has been making coffee since my knee pain started, he said it was him, DUHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.. wouldn't he have known we were running low (hello anyone home in that brain LOL) so if i don't have my coffee right a way i am a witch and especially since being on this diet its even worse because that is the only thing i really enjoy in my life is MY COFFEE, can't smoke (don't want to anyway), can't eat all the foods i love, can't have alcohol at the moment (no big deal anyway) but the point is i am missing out on a lot while he has pizza, i am sure he got himself a cup of coffee somewhere this morning, and all the fun stuff i miss out on.
Now when he said there was no coffee i said forget it, just bring some coffee back and make one then or bring some coffee in a can back and buy me a ready made one from Dunkin donuts to hold me off. I was very surprised i was calm!!!! LOL first time for everything right?
Well he comes to pick up my daughter and now this time she didn't do nothing to him, she was brushing her teeth and he needed the bathroom, fine she gave him the bathroom but she was running extremely late and came to me, it was 7:30 and first bell at her school is 7:35 (she is a senior) so i decided to take her but i had to move his car out of the way, Marissa made the mistake of opening his door and all his newspapers and takes my 11 month old with him and she loves this only until the real cold sets in and then she stays with me). Anyway matt comes out screaming at me and my daughter, "what the f..... are you doing" and he screams to her about screwing up his papers, she said she didn't mean it she wanted to get to school and he screamed some more and then he got me upset and i said some nasty things, he said he was quitting all his jobs (one full time job, then the newspapers and then he works at a pizza place temporarily), i said FINE go ahead, i no longer care.
Now i was fine even without my coffee until he started screaming at marissa for something so small. After our last fight we decided to not jump on anyone for something that really is small, so what, all she did was open his door and she didn't realize that the papers were leaning up against the door.
He turns around and said something nasty to marissa and i assume it was, as she busted out crying saying she hated him and he was a lousy stepfather, here i was with my jaw hanging open and my little 11 month old just sleeping away through the whole thing, i ended up bursting into tears.
Now normally without my coffee i usually aggravate but today i was proud of myself, I still yet haven't had my coffee and really i could care less. I just want to go back to bed and not bother anymore. I had to force myself to go and try to get marissa to school and all this isn't laziness, i had to stop taking her and stop doing my morning things due to the knee pain which is so incapacitating and very depressing. Maybe he feels i am lazy, I AM NOT!!!! it hurts like you know what and it feels like someone is ripping me open with a knife, sighhhhhh
anyway that's my story, i don't think we both did anything to deserve this and i stuck up for my daughter because i know damn well if i were to open that door and the papers fell out, he would say "that's ok hon, you didn't mean it" but he ripped my daughter into shreds. I really understand why i overate and blew up to the size i am. I am not happy and so i run for food. My husband gets this way at times and sometimes marissa can aggravate him but she did nothing today, all she wanted was to get to school on time, they had a test first period and thats understandable.
Oh well sorry so long... off to bed i guess, i have a weigh in today (my second one) but i really don't even care about that at the moment, all i want is to go sleep