Help! Frustrated and need support/reassurance
 

I'm really frustrated this morning. I weighed myself this morning--it's not my regular weigh day yet, and I've GAINED 2 more pounds. This makes 3 pounds in the last 2 weeks. I expect weight fluctuations, but not already--I only began 12/27/04. Part of me thinks it might be that TOM. I only got my period back last month after having my son, and this would be the time if my cycle is going to be regular again already, but no signs of that. (Sorry if TMI!)

I'm frustrated enough that I'm tempted to do something more restrictive with my eating, even though this has always backfired in the past. I actually thought my eating was going well this week, but maybe my portions have been creeping up. My goal was to make gradual changes: change one or two bad eating habits every month, so I could sustain this forever. Maybe I'm deceiving myself? I've eliminated sweets and snacks, added a fruit and/or vegetable to every meal, try to eat "good carbs," and do step aerobics 5 x a week. Maybe that's not enough? I'm thinking of weighing and measuring my food for a week, and logging it on fitday just to see what I'm actually eating, but I don't want to fall into that "diet" mentality. Oh, what should I do????

I'm going to go out on a limb here and comment on one thing you mentioned (and warning: this might be long!). One thing you said makes me think you & I might have very similar personalities, so I want to share my experience with you.

When I first started this WL journey, I really didn't even know I was on one. My husband got a deal through his work for us to join a gym at a reduced price, so I thought we'd join, just so I could start exercising and "be a little more healthy." During high school and college, I was alternatingly anorexic and bulimic, so I was VERY wary of dieting at all. In fact, I told my husband at the begininning that he should be alarmed if I started "logging my calories or anything like that."

I started going to the gym every day, but my weight really wasn't changing. So I thought I'd try logging for just a little while, in this program called Diet Power. It was a HUGE eye-opener. Even though I was working out a lot and eating what I *thought* were sensible meals, I was eating way too many calories on a daily basis, which was keeping me from losing.

Something was different this time from my past diet attempts... this time I realized it wasn't a diet, but that I was teaching myself to eat like a thin(ner) person! That subtle change of mindset has made all the difference. Unlike what I had feared, I didn't get nutty or over-restrictive; in fact, sometimes I realized I could eat a little more and still be within my calories for the day. I also learned some important lessons about getting more "bang for my buck" with my calories.

I guess all of this is to say that maybe you should just TRY logging for at least couple of days. Don't go nuts with it, but just try to get a sense of how many calories you're eating (and how healthy your diet is). Think of it not as a diet but as a learning a new way of eating that you can continue forever.

Hope I haven't offended -- you obviously have to find whatever works for you, but I recognized something similar to my own situation in what you said. Whatever you decide, keep plugging away. It really is about the long haul, and your weight has a way of catching up with your "good works" eventually.

OMG I read this and said "THIS SOUNDS LIKE ME" :lol:

Some weeks I have weighed myself 5 times! I wish I could show you my journal (I've been doing this since 6/03. I've gone up, down, maintained.

I've had so many freak out at the scale sessions it's not funny. My boyfriend is thinking about starting to charge me for all the pep talks! :lol:

Starting this year I do log all my food into fitday. I spent so much time on Jenny Craig and WWs weighing and measuring my food, that I do have an idea now of how much I'm eating. I do think it's important to have a clear idea of what a cup of food is, or a portion. I struggle with getting too much into the diet mentality too, but being in a routine helps that. I take one meal a week off too, to eat something I might be craving. [I model my food by those two programs, with so many proteins, starches, fruits and veggies.]

For me, it takes a while to see what my pattern of weight loss might be, and that pattern changes over time. My periods never have been regular and vary from heavy to light.

The advice I would give myself (and you can decide if you think it would help you) is to lighten up and keep plugging at it. When I get to a point where I truly know I'm not doing enough, I know I have to tweak it (I usually start with more exercise and cutting back on extras that might have creeped in to the program -- sometimes I eat crackers at night when I feel hungry, or I have chocolates as treat, doh!).

I think it always will be a work in progress, so the more I keep track of my efforts, the more I can tell what I need to do to make it more successful (and I can be real about how much I am doing).

I hope that long winded reply helps!

When I started this my weight too would fluctuate. I would lose 4 pounds the first week, gain back 3 the next, lose 2 the next gain 5 the week after. I kept thinking, it's just my body adjusting. It's been almost a year and I'm down almost 40 pounds. Sure it's not as much as I would've liked but had I not stuck it out, I can say with 100% certaintity that I would be well over 300 pounds today had I not started changing my life.

Don't let it get you down. (I know easier said than done.) I don't remember how old you said your son is but remember when you get pregnant you get tons of new hormones in your system and sometimes it can take a couple of years for you body to get back to "normal" and normal may not mean the way it was before.

I would definitely recommend logging in fitday.com. I read recently that a large percentage of people who are counting calories are counting them wrong. I think portion sizes are a large part of that because a lot of us (including me) have lost touch with what a real portion is. You may be eating a lot more calories than you thought you were.

Thanks for the replies and encouragement! The concensus seems unanimous--I'm logging my food on fitday. I appreciate you sharing your experiences with me. I'm feeling a lot less anxious now. :goodvibes

Jennifer, your instincts are right on--I think we are alike. I also had an eating disorder during my high school and college years, and I'm very skittish about anything like a traditional diet. But I'll use the logging, like you suggest, as a teaching tool, as long as I don't go to that "bad" place.