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Old 10-05-2004, 11:06 PM   #1
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Unhappy Ugh .... OFF the wagon ...again

Well, dinner didn't go so well. I told myself alllll the way there I was going to have something simple and healthy. Didn't turn out that way. I ended up having breaded shrimp and pasta for supper and also a caesar salad. Ugh, hopefully I didn't do much damage .. my last few days have been wonderful!!!!

Tomorrow is a NEW day ... (thank god!)
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Old 10-05-2004, 11:18 PM   #2
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Dawn - You're right tomorrow is a new day! If it makes you feel any better, I went out for dinner as well with good intentions, i may add, but ended up having wings and pizza!

It can be sooo hard sometimes, I do really well for 2-3 days then a bad couple. Now, why can't all those good days just be in a row. I think we must define our triggers and stay away from eating out until things are fully under control!

Ah, my fellow canadian - let's help each other shall we?!
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Old 10-06-2004, 12:12 AM   #3
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Dawn, don't beat yourself up, just pick up right now at your last on-plan moment. Why don't you make a point of doing some extra exercise tomorrow -- even if it's just a 20 minute walk -- whatever you can. And I agree with Celina about defining the triggers -- that's important. But really, don't dwell on it too much, just pull yourself back up in the saddle again and move forward. That was then, this is now; you can't uneat it so just keep moving forward with a positive attitude and don't lose the great momentum that you've built up! You're doing great, really! Big picture, girlfriend......big picture! to you both.
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Old 10-06-2004, 12:23 AM   #4
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Ugh, I'm right there with you guys.
Did awesome the first few days of induction on the South Beach plan, got emotional over some crap with my job and wham....I totally fell off the wagon the past few days. I am so pissed at myself. I know the salty foods have made me retain water once again, so up went the scale. So the 9 pounds I dropped during week one of induction, have now turned to 2! I could just cry. I was so gung-ho this time to do this, I really thought this time was different. I always start and fail (I'm sure so many can relate) - but I am still not ready to give up. Tomorrow is another day, you are right. I signed up for an October exercise challenge and have yet to exercise. I did really well today, up until dinner time and then ate what the kids had for supper which was chicken fried steak, veggies and fries!

Getting this weight off is so important to me, and I also need to do it for health reasons other than the obvious ones. The problem I have had, since I was 12 (I'm 34 now) is that I am a total emotional eater!! For those of you that can relate, how did you find your way to somewhat overcome that and get through those bad times that just have you running for something sweet or salty? It drives me nuts! I'm so tired of myself looking this way and feeling like I've been hit by a bus.

Thanks for letting me vent. I'm not throwing in the towel just yet, but I might strangle myself with it....

~P
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Old 10-06-2004, 12:45 AM   #5
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Hi Texas Mom -- I dealt with emotional eating issues as well, and the way that I -- well, I won't say "stopped," but rather "redirected" them was to have all my meals and snacks pre-prepared, so if I was going to reach for something, I'd be set up already with something healthy. I had my 3 meals planned and prepared (or ready, in the case of breakfast,) as well as my mid-morning and mid-afternoon snacks. I think eating small meals frequently has been key to my success -- it helps ward off blood sugar- and hunger-related vulnerabilities. If I was wanting to eat something off plan for the wrong reasons and was having trouble with it -- like at work with bagels and cream cheese (I adore bagels & cc) or brownies or cake or whatever (there's something there 3 out of 5 days a week, in addition to all the candy in everybody's cubes) I'd just MAKE myself drink a huge glass of water and take a walk around the office to clear my head. I just had to remind myself all the time that I was trying to not be fat anymore. I honestly would forget in the beginning and instinctively begin to go for it, then I'd remind myself of Beverly's (boibaby's) signature, "Never trade what you want most for what you want at the moment." It became my mantra, and really helped me so much. I would just concentrate on giving myself positive feedback in my mind when I reached for cottage cheese when others were having chips, or I was having an apple and a protein drink when they were having cookies. You can do it, but not by accident. I think you have to be just so PURPOSEFUL, particularly in the beginning. You're doing one of the hardest things to do: changing a habit. It's hard and it sure doesn't happen overnight....but it's completely possible. If you look at anyone who's lost any weight, know the following: they're not any better than you, or smarter than you, and they aren't naturally predisposed to more discipline or strength than you. And they were fat at one time, maybe obese, maybe morbidly obese. So what separates them from you? Choices. They made more positive choices than negative choices, and those conscious decisions to treat themselves lovingly and with care added up over a long time, to ultimately tip the scales in weight loss. Think about it. More positive than negative. None of us is perfect. None of us has not struggled or fallen flat on our faces and then been filled with self-loathing or disgust or shame. Or all of the above. But what separates the Losers from the Non-losers is repetition, and -- and this is just my own opinion here -- a huge amount of courage in believing again and again that weight loss is possible after all.

You can do it. You have it in you. You may not own the last moment, but you own this one. Shape it the way you want it to be. Build your own weight loss legacy and shape your own destiny. Be purposeful, plan, organize your food so you can more easily make the right choices -- ****, remove the choice from the equation altogether for now by knowing in advance what you're going to eat. Then, when you have some more time, experience, and positive history under your belt, you can give yourself some more leeway. I send you love and faith. If ever you need anything, feel free to post for help from this wonderful group, or PM me if you want. I know you can do it!!!
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Old 10-06-2004, 06:44 AM   #6
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Celina ... I'm here for ya babe! We can do this! I'm going to go for a walk today to work off what I ate! After a terrible meal I try to drink lots of water to help flush everything out .. usually makes me feel better ..... good thing is, I only drank water at supper! I avoided all pop! For that, I am proud!!!
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Old 10-06-2004, 09:40 AM   #7
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Dawn, your meal wasn't ALL bad! At least you got some protein in there! Hehe, we have this thing at work where we have to say 3 nice things about something before we say anything negative. You'd be suprised at all the creative, and helpful things you can come up with! I also had a bad bad dinner last night, but bit the bullet and figured out my points for the day, and turns out it wasn't as bad as I thought! I ended up at 2 points over for my day, which is great because I seriously sat around eating candy, drinking rootbeer floats, and eating grilled cheese sandwiches! The important thing is to keep going! Just think, you've already lost 5.2 pounds since Oct 1st, thats SO SO good!! Congrats
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Old 10-06-2004, 09:45 AM   #8
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See Dawn - You have to look at the positives and mini accomplishments... like ordering water with a nice dinner! You did well hun! And again, todays a new day.. So lets aim for a "perfect" one! I'll check in later tonight...
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Old 10-06-2004, 11:01 AM   #9
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Ahhh thanks guys! I don't feel sooooo bad now! I told my self I wasn't going to weigh myself everyday ( i have become addicted to the scale) but I checked this morning and it was not terrible! A good long walk should help! I see everyone who has done so well around here and I want to be there as well ... it is just hard! But I'll pull through it .. I just keep thinking about my self on a beach in the Caribbean .. I have 1 year and 4 months until then to get myself in shape and lookin' good!
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Old 10-06-2004, 11:12 AM   #10
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Let me correct myself .. I just re weighed myself for good measure .. and I have not budged! So no damage ... but no loss either .. I can live with that however, I would rather see the scale stand still then move up a pound or two!
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Old 10-06-2004, 02:17 PM   #11
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I have done the same thing many times Dawn. I tell myself all the way there that I am going to eat healthy. Somehow my mouth does not obey because when I blurt out what I want it's something unhealthy. You can do it just pick up and keep going.
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Old 10-06-2004, 02:20 PM   #12
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I agree with everyone here. If i said I hadn't fallen off plan a few times I would be a big liar! I think I saw someone had this in their sig "failure isnt falling down, it's staying down". Just stive to make the next meal better, and to get in some exercise and drink that water!! As for me, I just try to make more good choices than bad overalll.
Don't feel bad, we have all done it at one time or another
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Old 10-06-2004, 02:40 PM   #13
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Amen Sarah.

Let me say that again ... amen Sarah.

PURPOSEFUL and PLANNING are the two most important words here. I talked about this in answer to your previous post about night time snacking. If you find yourself time after time falling off plan because you tried to stick to something vague like, "I will eat something light and healthy" ... well ... obviously vague commands aren't going to cut it for you.

You need a SPECIFIC plan. Spend time beforehand (and not just in the car on the way over, but before that) outlining for yourself EXACTLY what you will and will not eat. Mentally rehearse it. Think about opening the menu and seeing all that tempting food. Imagine that voice saying, "What they hey? Go ahead and order what you want -- you can always restart your diet tomorrow. One meal isn't going to hurt," etc. Imagine telling the voice to SHUT UP and don't be silly -- you are going to stick to your plan. You've eaten in enough restaurants, with other people, to know the drill -- the pitfalls, the temptations, etc. Imagine yourself ordering properly and deflecting every single temptation. In fact, if you know the restaurant or you can see their menu ahead of time (either on the web or having them fax it to you), you can decide precisely what you are going to order before you even get there. Practice saying things like, "Dressing on the side" and "Prepare that without fat, please."

Be purposeful, plan, prepare, practice. Otherwise you're just winging it every time, and you are much more likely to go off plan when you are winging it, because that's when you are at your most vulnerable.
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Old 10-06-2004, 02:47 PM   #14
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In the past 4 months or so since I started watching what I eat, I will say there hasn't been any time that I went off plan unexpectedly. I may have not planned it out so much as to say "next wednesday I will eat this" but it is a mental thing you do and say "do you want to go off plan and eat this? what are the reasons? will you go right back on plan if you do eat it?" and then I make my choice.

I have planned eating out and said "I will eat the best I can" and I've also said "I know it isn't completely bad but it isn't really on my plan either, but I'll do it". Other times I tell myself and others that it isn't worth it to me to go off my eating plan and sometimes I want a taste of something so I will and if it is a rarity, then I don't see much harm in that. This way has given me little to no guilt about my eating but I will say sometimes I think "damn if I hadn't eaten that, wonder if the scale would've moved more" but it was my choice and I can't have any regrets about that.

So basically what I am saying is if you go off plan, don't worry too much but talk yourself through it. If you do it, accept it and promise yourself to go right back on plan. Don't be boggled down with guilt, that one meal isn't going to keep you fat forever, it is a cumulation of the choices you make.
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Old 10-06-2004, 03:21 PM   #15
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I want to reiterate what everybody else has been saying. The hardest part for me was when I was first getting started eating better, because I kept feeling like, "that's it... I've blown it. I'm off-plan for good now." But that's definitely the kind of thinking that got me fat in the first place, so I have tried this time to say, "Pfft. In my lifetime of healthy eating, it's not the end of the world." The key is to make a better choice the next time, and an even better one the time after that. After you've been at this a while, I think it will scare you a little less.

Adjustment is key, too! I like the fact that you immediately thought about going on a walk. I've been around skinny people at my work lately, and I've noticed that they have a longer-term view of healthy behavior than I used to have. They may splurge at dinner, but then they'll eat smaller meals the next day and/or get some extra exercise.

Remind yourself that it's about the long view. I know you can do this.
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