Motivation~
 

Argh, my day starts out wonderful ... I eat only what I should be eating .. then by the end of night, it's like ... I just don't care .. I'll start tomorrow .. it's always "I'll start tomorrow" .. I just can't seem to get outta the rut of "starting tomorrow" ... frustrating ... I do well and I see results and I sabotage myself .... blah! :?: :(

do you maybe have some sort of underlying fear that might be the cause of you sabataging yourself? that's probably a pretty touchy subject but once i faced mine it has been easier (not totally easy) to stay op.

God, I wish I knew! My husband said the same thing. I don't know. I want it so bad you would think I would work my *** of. I am so used to be "fat" and not caring either way ... man I suck! :)

i was the same way when i first started. i thought i wanted it so bad but this time around i realize that i only half wanted it then. just take your time. sooner or later things will fall into place and you will be well on your way to the new you!

I dont know about you, but I tend to be an emotional eater,.. If i am stressed,sad, bored, i go right for the food. I also like to have something sweet at least once a day,.. sometimes its a "good" food and sometimes it isnt.. But try to overall make more good then bad choices. After all, skinny people still eat bad food sometimes, they just dont go overboard, everything in moderation I guess.
I can relate to what you are saying. I always said i wanted to lose weight soooo bad, but I always slipped back into my old convenient ways. This time around I have been doing baby steps, I am not even calorie counting (although i probably will eventually. I just eat when im hungry (I mean really hungry, try not to let my emotions control that) and then eat, but try not to overdo it, and substitute better, low fat foods when I can. of course, i try to exercise a bit at least 5-6 times a week, but right now i only can do between a half and a mile on my leslie sansone dvd. This board has been a great support tool this time around.

I always think that I need to do all or nothing, and then if I screw up a tiny bit I just figure I'll start the next day.. and then I was thinking.. what if I only diet HALF the time, and only lose HALF the weight as I want to.. and in the end, anything is better than nothing. I'm babbling.. but my point is, at a certain point, isn't ANYTHING better than nothing? Like, if you eat good 2 out of 3 meals, you could theoretically lose 2 out of 3 pounds, not exactly of course! And I can't spell either.. but I like my theory :)

They say you can't make lasting changes in your life until you hit rock bottom. I feel like I've been there so many times though. Something will happen and I will feel horrible about my weight and vow to start being serious about losing weight. This will last a short time and then I am back to my normal habits. What I think I am doing now is trying to identify those behaviours that I have the most trouble with. I can't change everything at once so I'm trying to take really tiny baby steps even if it doesn't seem like a big deal I'm hoping that they will lead to bigger steps. For example I tried the Dr. Phil Rapid Start Plan for 2 weeks and though I went off the plan many times I still lost 6 lbs. I couldn't stick to it afterwards because it was so foreign to the way I have always eaten. So what I am trying to do is incorporate some of the plan into the way I eat without completely doing the plan, hopefully at some point I will be eating the way this plan is. My biggest downfall is food like cookies, chips, white bread...I just can't stay away from them. so instead of completely cutting them out I'm working really hard on cutting back. Like instead of having 5 cookies, I'll have 2. I'm also focusing a lot right now on going to the gym, it has been rough but I'm getting there average of 3 days a week, my goal is 5 days a week. Once I get into the groove of doing that I'm going to focus on doing my weight training more often. I've been doing it about once a week and would like to increase that to 2 times to start.

Just rereading your first post...can you identify why you are eating off plan by the end of the day? Are you actually hungry or is it emotional eating? If you are trying to change too many habits too quickly or cutting back on calories too much maybe you really are hungry. something I have been doing is making sure the kitchen is cleaned up and the lights turned off as soon as possible after supper. That way I am less tempted to go in and get something to eat, I don't want to make a mess of my kitchen or have dirty dishes in the sink. anyway just some thoughts...we all know how it feels to go through these stages so we're with ya!

Dawn,

Maybe you also have a bit of habitual eating going on. What do you generally do in the evening? If it is your usual habit to relax and lets say, watch television and during that time you used to snack, maybe what needs to change is your evening routine. Can you maybe go to the gym or take a walk instead?

The thought that has most helped me was knowing that there were things I wanted to do in this life that I physically cannot do right now because of my weight. I didnt want to get to the end of my life and know that the only thing keeping me from doing these things was weight. I have a four year old adopted son (and a 9 year old adopted son who is the 4 year olds brother). My little guy was born without a hand or fingers on his left hand, possibly due to the fact that his birth mom did drugs during her pregnancy. Let me tell you, there is nothing this kid cannot do. He can ride a bike, open containers, climb trees, dress himself. He's amazing. He does all these things and has no control over the fact that he is missing a hand. I have control over my eating and exercising. I could be just as unstoppable as my son. I see the things he can achieve, so me, with all my limbs etc, can surely achieve getting into shape so I can keep up with him :)

Hang in there and keep reminding yourself of all the reasons you want to lose weight. Those reasons are wonderful motivators!

Hey All,

Since I am not working right now (just graduated, can't find a job) I tend to watch all my shows at night. Which, yup, leads to snackin' away. Some nights I think I can do it I can do it ... and then all of a sudden I'm off the wagon! I have motivation to lose the weight .. my friend is getting married in the Caribbean in 2006 and well needless to say I wanna look good on that beach .. we went away March 2004 and I had lost 45lbs at that point .. but all the food and alcohol didn't help .. we all gained 10 pounds by time we came back .. I came back to no job .. no school .. and well here I am today ... what I was before I lost the weight ...
I sound like a whiney lil brat! :) I know I can do this ...I just don't know how to start :)

Its a tough one this one......but congrats on identifying the problem and asking for help.... that's half the battle. Some of the things I have done to beat the 'eating at the end of the day' blues...

1. Make sure you eat regularly throughout the day - if you let yourself get tired, low blood sugar, very hungry, its really hard to stay in control

2. Get the junk, sugar, fatty, etc food out of the house....so that if you really want it, you have to make some effort to get it...

3. Fill the cupboards, fridge, with healthy food that you like.....fruit, vegetable, low fat protein etc

4. Try to avoid the TV, or do something while watching TV.

5. Go for comfort-exercise rather than comfort-eating!

6. Sit with those difficult feelings - dont try and smother them in food.

7. Give yourself a break. All-or-nothing is a very tough approach. Some days will be better than others food or exercise wise. Forgive yourself, and move on.

8. Allow yourself to feel great about the positive change you are making.

9. Keep coming here, posting, reading etc etc!

Well I figure that this is a new month .. and a beginning of a new me .. I have been reading on here for hours and realized I am not the only one with this problem .. so I am not going to feel sorry for my self .. I am going to get my butt off the couch and outta the fridge and feel better about myself! And thanks to you guys I'm half way there!! :moo:

Dawn -

What you are describing is my life to a T sometimes. I really think you just need a few good days under your belt. What do you think that you can do to get yourself going? I needed some accountability, so I went to my local YMCA and started a Startfit program that requires my attendance 3x a week. When I exercise, I seem to have an easier time staying on plan.

BTW - what plan are you following.

In addition to Claire's excellent points, let me add:

What helped me was having a plan. Not just a resolve to "do better tomorrow" but a concrete plan on paper. The night before I plan what I'm going to eat the next day and write up a menu. This not only gives me a menu to check off (thus giving me a sense of accomplishment as well as a specific guide), but it is my time to reflect and mentally prepare for the next day overall.

Second, as others have discussed, identify those eating triggers. Eating while watching TV is a huge habit for most of us, and it's crucial to break it. You can have things handy (again, this is where planning comes into play) that are on program -- vegetables & no-calorie condiments (vinegar, salsa, etc.), hot tea with splenda, sugar-free jello. Use these when the urge to eat seems overwhelming. More importantly, though, do things to BREAK the habit altogether. Always have something in your hands when you watch TV -- a crossword puzzle, needlework, a scrapbook, whatever. Or do your nails. Or jog in place, do yoga poses or bicep curls or leg lifts or ... Better yet, cut down on the TV watching -- nobody ever got to the end of their life and said, "I wish I'd watched more TV."

Approach all of your eating triggers with this type of creative problem-solving: Identify it, find a substitute, find a way to break the association, avoid altogether. It works, I promise!

I think everyone has given you some great advice.

If the urge overwhelms you, take a shower, go to bed, brush your teeth. Life is all about choices. You have to decide if that TV program is worth watching if it means you are going to eat and eat during it. That was a big one for me and I gave up a few TV shows I used to enjoy watching for that reason. Now I walk in the evenings and spend less time in front of the TV.

I think you're doing great so far. I mean you are still trying to find out why you're nighttime binge eating and not just saying it can't be done and giving up.