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Can I skip a birthday this year?

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Old 08-05-2004, 02:04 AM   #1
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Lightbulb Can I skip a birthday this year?

I have a huge birthday coming up, it's scary! I'm turning 25, which I'm sure seems young to many of you, but I had GOALS! I will be 25, overweight, working retail (which I hate), shacked up with my boyfriend in a basement suite, I have a car thats falling apart, but I still have to pay 430 bucks a month for it! I think thats all I'm unhappy about, but I don't know HOW to change those things! Like, I understand in order to lose more weight than I am that I need to get cracking down with the whole South Beach thing, and I was preparing to start it on Monday, but I want a change now. And I know if I start tomorrow I will end up quitting because my brother and his girlfriend are in town for the weekend. Or maybe I need to be less hard on myself? I am losing about 1 lb a week from my new birthcontrol pill, for a total loss of 5 pounds to date, and I know, I've been told many many times that the weight loss isn't "real", but it feels real? At least the pill is keeping my hormones a bit more level.. Anyways, I'm rambling, but I don't want to turn 25!!! I'm not ready for it yet!! I want to BE someone, I want to be fulfilled.. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin, do I want too much?
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Old 08-05-2004, 07:24 AM   #2
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Yes! Your asking too much

Honey its the going forward and not backward. I had all these goals for 25, **** I had all these goals for 30. If you keep moving forward these things do come. Trust me. And last night when I was out with my gf's I said a similiar thing. I wanted a nest egg, my own house, and a budding career. Well at 25 I was just getting out of college. So all those things have been pushed for what I cal "God's time" I keep doing the footwork of life and blessings and dreams come true. I personally am still not ready for a house, who would do the yard work? And my career is budding. I do have quite a substantial next egg, and I am fully vested at my job. I have my health. I am almost 90 lbs down from my highest weight, and 46 lbs down from last summer. What blessings we have today. And you know what I am more gorgeous in my soul today at 32, than 123 lbs self was at 25. You got a whole lost of womanhood ahead, and HEAR US ROAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Old 08-05-2004, 01:10 PM   #3
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No, you're not asking too much.....it just may take a while to get there!

Its great to have dreams and goals....but then maybe you have to think about the small steps that you will take to get there.....and just to be a bit mean and challenging on the eating plan front....what's stopping you eating healthy when you're brother and his girlfriend are in town??
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Old 08-05-2004, 08:05 PM   #4
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Well, my brother and his gf arrive Friday, and will pick me up from work, and we will probably go to a movie, and out for dinner at one of Vancouver's incredibly good restaurants. And then on Sat, I have to work 9-6pm, and then am going out for dinner with friends and my brother and gf, and then to fireworks. I could probably manage on Sunday though. When things are SUPER busy like they will be this weekend, it's hard for me to think ahead, and I don't really have time to think ahead either. I work everyday this week, and work from 9-5:30, which means I leave the house at 7:15am, and will get home about 7:15 pm ( I am home early today, yaahoo!). It gives me about 3 hours a day to do all the things I need to do, there is just NOT enough hours in a day Not only that, if I don't get enough sleep I get so crabby and unpleasant, so I need to try and get at LEAST 8 hours of sleep a night.. I'm a pretty needy person.. lol
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Old 08-05-2004, 09:14 PM   #5
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Hey SwimGirl! I went through my 'quarter-life crisis' last summer when I turned 25. (Now I'm a veritable dinosaur at 26!!) I thought I was one step away from going into a nursing home! I was bothered about turning 25 for awhile, but eventually I got over it. All my friends are aging right along with me, so we're all at similar points in our life - so I don't really notice the aging that much. I think about wanting to be younger, but then when I see people at that younger age, I realize I can't really relate to them anymore and wonder why I would want to be that age again. All these thoughts eventually lead to why I wanted to get more serious about weight loss - I want to be able to say that I'm enjoying the present as much as I can and not dwelling on the past.

Anyway, I guess what I want to say is that you're not alone in feeling confused! I mean, I'm in the process of getting my master's degree but I'm not even certain if I want to really be in this field longterm or what I want to do after I finish or where I want to go - I even kind of resent the people that seem to have such specific goals and are driven to achieve them! I don't really have any specific goals, which leaves me feeling a bit like a 'drifter.'

Goodluck this week with your brother's visit!
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Old 08-05-2004, 09:40 PM   #6
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Thank you Lekker, I totally needed to know I'm not the only who paniced when they hit 25. I am the first of my close friends to hit 25, and I'm also the only one who is in a job with no future ( or rather, the idea of doing retail for the rest of my life is depressing). Most of the people I know are happy with simpler things, I mean, by 25 I had planned on being an Olympic swimmer (could have been possible, but lack of money was one major issue), I also planned to be graduating University, luckily I'm vain enough that if I was at *least* thin and "hot", I could deal with all the rest of the let-downs, heh. I'm such a complainer these days, I need to STOP that! Thank you for the reassurance
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Old 08-05-2004, 11:06 PM   #7
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I fixed it so my picture shows!! Yay, my geeky internet friends helped me
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Old 08-05-2004, 11:13 PM   #8
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What is it about birthdays that make everythign seem so futile???

I hope you realize, though, that there's no deadline to the things that you want to do. Sure, it'd be nice to have it done by a milestone-esque birthday, but think about it. It's really just a date. AND the changes you're looking for don't happen overnight. A lot of people much older than you are in the same type of situation.

Also, I like your picture.. you're a cutie pie
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Old 08-06-2004, 12:45 AM   #9
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SwimGirl,

I agree with Dana, there are no deadlines to accomplishing the things you want. The main thing is you're focused and you're doing everything you can to get there! These things don't change overnight and YOU WILL GET THERE! Just stay positive and stay focused!

Also, I can totally relate to wanting to reach your goals and wanting to reach them RIGHT NOW! I can honestly say, I want things to soon and tend to focus on the future rather than the present. So, you're not alone! What's working for me right now, is realizing that these things will come.. it may not just be as soon as you'd ideally like. However YOU WILL GET THERE! And, be thankful for the things you have right now.. Think of how many people don't even have the neccasity's in life... You're doing wonderful! Be grateful and stay strong! :
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Old 08-06-2004, 06:00 PM   #10
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This last birthday (30) was the hardest one ever. I give you full permission to ignore it.
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Old 08-06-2004, 08:43 PM   #11
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I panicked when I turned 24. I understand. So, I give you full permission to be outrageous. I kicked a worthless boyfriend out of the house, broke off an engagement and started writing again.... I suggest something more subtle.
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