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Old 07-07-2004, 12:25 PM   #1
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Default who knows?

Hey everyone. I'm just wondering how many of you told most of the people in your lives about your decision to lose weight. I guess this doesn't so much apply to those of you who have already lost a lot of weight- but maybe initially, when you started.

My mom knows. She had lapband surgery and is doing really well. I know it's no walk in the park for her, either. So we talk about it sometimes.

I guess that means my dad knows too. I cook for him while I'm home from school for the summer and have been using weight watchers recipes for the most part.

No one else really knows. I didn't tell my boyfriend or my close friends. I think I'm just really afraid that it's going to stress me out and I'm going to jinx myself, or that they're going to be critical (which realistically, I KNOW they wouldn't). Is anyone else weird about this? Who did you tell when you were starting out?
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Old 07-07-2004, 12:47 PM   #2
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I TOLD EVERYONE!!! I needed and still need all the support and encouragement along the way. So no matter where I went, if I would even THINK about going off track someone would be there to remind me if I needed a little push in the right direction! I get myeself so pumped up about it. It's nice to share the experience with others, especially positive people who just encourage you to keep going-- Someone to share in your journey through the good parts and bad, (my husband is one). I am weird I guess. Well maybe not weird, just abnormal..
On this rollercoaster ride for the last time!

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Old 07-07-2004, 01:06 PM   #3
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At first I wanted to lose a bunch of weight and not tell anyone. I wanted my husband to be shocked and in awe when he came home from Japan. That did not last long. I can't keep a secret worth a flip. Once I started losing I wanted to share with other people. I can understand your point of view though. I think in the back of our minds sometimes we figure that if we don't tell anyone and fail then we really did not make ourselves look bad in front of anyone else. Keeping our shame private.

If you learn from your suffering, and really come to understand the lesson you were taught, you might be able to help someone else who's now in the phase you may have just completed. Maybe that's what it's all about after all...

~ Anonymous ~

Highest weight: 261
Starting weight: 248 August 26
Current weight: 193
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Old 07-07-2004, 01:27 PM   #4
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I was browsing around and saw this question...its a good one.

At my highest weight, I felt I needed to do something about it. But I didn't tell anyone....not even my husband (ex). I felt I needed to do this on my own and I didn't want someone to be the food police around me. (which has happened in the past) As childish as it was, it would only have made me rebel and eat more. Stupid thinking.
I managed to lose the weight (I got down to 130) and my family were very happy and supportive after they realized that I started to lose weight. That's when I decided to share what I was doing.

I am now trying to lose 20 of the pounds that I gained back....and once again I haven't told anyone except my friends here at 3FC and my current husband. He is very supportive (unlike my ex) As supportive as my family has been, I just feel more comfortable doing it on my own without having eyes on me while I eat. Does that make sense? Maybe once I lose 10lbs. I will say something..or just say nothing at all. I think the compliments I get once I lose weight is such a great feeling that it keeps the motivation going. And my family tends to notice more when they don't know that I'm working on it.

Thanks for letting me share my story.


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Old 07-07-2004, 01:32 PM   #5
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I didn't tell anyone at first because I didn't want anyone to think, oh, here she goes again. Plus I also think it was kind of a safety net incase I did fail again, at least no one would have known I was even trying. I'm also just a very private person, I mean I didn't even say anything to my husband, but he's pretty clueless anyway! But if people asked I did tell them that I was trying to eat healthier and eventually it just became obvious that I had made some pretty drastic changes and everyone realized that I was doing something different.

New goal: staying binge free and losing those last few again, but for the last time!!
"Never trade what you want at the moment for what you want the most." -unknown
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Old 07-07-2004, 02:04 PM   #6
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This time around I didn't want to tell anyone but my husband.

Last year I lost 40 lbs, and everyone knew about it. I just didn't like it.

Now this time around my husband knows, and he opened his big mouth and told his Mom. She is a know it all nurse who lived 2000 miles away and still feels the need to tell me what is going on with my body. She really irks me.

My sister realized I was back on when she came over and saw my diet soda and the lack of doritos and such.

I would rather people realize that I am losing weight on their own. Not by me telling them.

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Old 07-07-2004, 03:05 PM   #7
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The first person I told was an online friend because we made a deal a couple months ago that I would lose 50 pounds if she quit smoking. She has been smoke-free for 4 months now so it's my turn to hold up my end of the deal. Then I had to tell my male friend because he actually wanted to take me out for once and was wondering why I was ordering a grilled chicken sandwich. He has always been super supportive of my weightloss efforts. I also told one of my coworkers when she noticed my reg Dr. Peppers were replaced with diet. That's about it, my boss like to sabotage me so she doesn't need to know, and my mom is a Weight Watcher leader and I saw her at the end of May at the beach, but I won't see her again until mid-September when we take our family beach trip and I'd like to surprise her with a 40 pound loss by then.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent - Eleanor Roosevelt
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Old 07-07-2004, 03:07 PM   #8
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I haven't told anyone--my style is more to keep my head down and plug away and if somebody notices, great. I also don't like being scrutinized. A few years ago I lost a significant amount of weight only to have those around me who were aware of my efforts begin to act as food police. LOL!! I'd rather quietly chip away at it. Just my .02cents
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Old 07-07-2004, 03:32 PM   #9
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I think any way you do it is great! The most important part is that you are doing it!

Did I misunderstand the question? Did you mean once you started losing the weight did you tell everyone? If that's the question, no I didn't report my losses to people each week but I did tell them I was starting a plan so they were aware and could keep me on my toes..
On this rollercoaster ride for the last time!

Last edited by tolose85 : 07-07-2004 at 03:38 PM.
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Old 07-07-2004, 03:38 PM   #10
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My husband knows, since he's stay-at-home dad this summer, and he cooks. Even though he was the one who bought the South Beach book, and read it first, nothing stuck. He's constantly trying to feed me off-program food.
I think most everyone at work has figured it out, since I arrive with my little Igloo, and munch on salad all day!! LOL
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Old 07-07-2004, 05:38 PM   #11
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I generally let everyone know. all though I have not told anyone at work except my partner but she diets also. I'm sure they have heard us and know I am on a diet again but I have not told them. Friends and family all know. I find support in people who know.
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Old 07-07-2004, 06:06 PM   #12
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My family knows ~ my mom is my biggest encourager. I don't like to say much to the people at work, because some of them I feel, are the kind who would be watching ~ sort or waiting for that slip up ~ and enjoying making comments (probably behind my back) about it. Without saying anything though ~ they know. There is constantly food around ~ patient's familys bring Krispy Kreme Doughnuts and other stuff to treat us. Coworkers bring stuff ~ and people are constantly offering and I am having to constantly say no thank you ~ so they know even though I don't directly tell them. Sometimes I wonder if they wonder why I am always saying no thank you, but never seem to get any smaller. I guess my thinking about that is ~ I might not be getting smaller very fast, but if I gave in every time to the treats that are around, I would be even larger than I already am.


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Old 07-07-2004, 06:12 PM   #13
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Default I am starting out too

I have only told my family well some of them. Because some people like look at you different when you go on a diet. And some people really stress me out.
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Old 07-07-2004, 06:29 PM   #14
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Thanks for your input, guys.

I think it's great for those of you who shared it with others. Gretchen, you didn't misunderstand the question. I didn't mean a weekly play-by-play or anything like that; just letting people know that you were on a plan or whatever.

I just feel uncomfortable sharing this information; I feel like people are going to say something stupid like "oh there she goes again, how long will THIS last?" MNJ, I am the same way. If someone discourages me in the least, I will do everything in my power to act like they don't bother me. Last time I saw my great-grandmother she got on her high horse and told me that I needed to lose weight and wouldn't let go of it. I was almost in tears, but I ate everything on my plate right in front of her. I can be really immature, but it's no one's place to tell anyone that they need to do ANYTHING.
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Old 07-07-2004, 06:41 PM   #15
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In addition to my partner, who overnight had to deal with a home containing ONLY clean eats, I told pretty much everyone. I really wanted to take advantage of any support I could get, as well as increase my accountability, so that I'd find it harder to let myself off the hook if I was presented with temptation. I'm really glad I did, because my co-workers and friends really went out of their way to be supportive, and it really helped a lot. I went into it with positive expectations, knowing that I would succeed if I put my mind to it and stuck it out, and I wanted to utilize all available resources to set myself up for success.
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