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24 almost 25 and 292lbs! Need Support!

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Old 07-26-2003, 09:35 PM   #1
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Unhappy 24 almost 25 and 292lbs! Need Support!

Hello All,
I am 24 will be 25 in Sept. I weigh 292 pounds. Tried Weight Watchers... lost 7 and then quit. Just didn't have the support I needed. No one there wanted to be my friend too "clicky" I think. I live in a small rual Iowa community... so going to another meeting is not an option. I have been battling depression for years. And medication has helped but I need friends.
I want to walk with someone but NO one will walk with me. I get all sorts of excuses from family. I have no friends. When I did I was always the fat one. My sister is 40 and is a size 5!! Figures! So she isn't much help understanding.
HELP!
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Old 07-27-2003, 12:46 AM   #2
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Welcome Irishprincess from a fellow Celtic gal!

What I found to be true at the beginning of my weight loss was that even if I had to do it totally alone, I was going to "just do it" no matter how uncomfy it was going to feel. I didn't even tell anyone I was doing it. . .I just wanted to let them see the weight coming off. And once people start noticing, you'll be amazed at the support you'll get, even if it's just a nice compliment.

I'm doing Weight Watchers and I truly love it. . .it's literally been a Godsend for me. Maybe you could give it one more try. . .new people join here in my small town every week. . .maybe you can find a friend there now that wasn't there the first go round.

Blessings always and may Patrick smile down upon ye! *wink*
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Old 07-27-2003, 01:15 AM   #3
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Princess - I agree with your fellow Irish gal...you may just need to go it alone for awhile.

One of the first things you need to do is set a SMALL goal. It doesn't even have to be related to a number on a scale; in fact, you might want to think about how you want to measure success without being a slave to a scale. I think fitness related goals are good, like "I will walk for five minutes around the neighborhood each day for a week." When you reach your goals, celebrate! Even something as goofy as a sticker in a scrapbook could be motivation.

Second, don't ever forget that you are a miracle and that you are deserving of love not only from others, but from yourself. We big girls tend to wallow in our own self-loathing, which gets nothing accomplished other than to drag us down deeper into a vicious cycle.

We're always here if you need us.
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Old 07-27-2003, 01:29 AM   #4
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I 3rd that opinion. I joined Weight Watchers on June 17, 2003 and I didn't know anyone (I live in a big city) and just now on my 6th week is the first time I've talked to anyone there. It helps to have others support you, but ultimately it is what YOU want and how badly you want it.
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Old 07-27-2003, 09:39 AM   #5
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First let me say Welcome! You will find support here with us. I know how you feel because every other time i tried to lose weight I got no support here and i have a very hard time finding friends period. This time my mother started eating better and exercising and now we keep each other on track. When we started mall walking no on talked to us but now there are a few of the regulars that chat with us. I bet if you continue to go you will find a buddy.
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Old 07-27-2003, 12:31 PM   #6
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Welcome to the board! I hope you will find everyone here to be as helpful on your weight loss journey as I do.

After moving to a new city, I joined Weight Watchers last fall and knew absolutely nobody. I'd joined WW many times before, but this time was different because I knew I was going to do it no matter what. I also knew that I would get the most out of it by participating, which is difficult to do in a group, and really difficult to do in a group where you don't know anyone. But for me it makes the difference. I share stories of my successes and failures, and I don't care if anyone is really listening--it helps me and I'm what it's all about. But I've noticed the more I go and share, the more people talk to me.

I also go to aerobics where I don't know anyone, and little by little, I've been learning people's names, but it's taken months and this is a group of people who've been attending the same class for years.

So, I guess my advice is to stick with it, and do it for yourself. It's kind of like that Field of Dreams movie. If you do it, friends will come. Also, we can be your support. I find cyberfriends to be great support, and I hope you do, too.
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Old 07-27-2003, 01:15 PM   #7
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Consistency is key. Once people see you are there every week & losing just like them, it will be ok. Slow & steady wins this race.
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Old 07-27-2003, 08:27 PM   #8
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Hey Princess!
Welcome to the board! This is a great place to be, everyone here is so supportive. I started my journey about a year later in life than you are, I am 26 going on 27, and was at about 298 (could have been more, but I refuse to admit that it is possible that I weighed more than that). I'm working to get to 125-130.

I too am a WWer, have been since Dec. 30, 2002. I'm down about 55 from my all time high and 45 since joining WW. I too did not know anyone from the meeting I joined. I found that by sitting in the same spot each week, I got to know the girls around me.

Good luck with however you decide to venture on your weight loss journey. And be sure to stick around and keep us updated on your progress. There's a wealth of knowledge represented here, and we're all willing to share.
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Old 07-27-2003, 08:52 PM   #9
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Welcome! You will receive lots of support here. I'll look forward to hearing your progress.
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Old 07-27-2003, 09:46 PM   #10
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Welcome!! Look forward to hearing more from you!!
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Old 07-27-2003, 09:57 PM   #11
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Oh Sweetie, ((((big hugs)))). Don't let the other in your WW class have the power over you to keep you from going. I know it's lonely at first, but as you go more, make progress, and feel more comfortable with yourself, you'll be surprised how many friends you make.

I felt that way when I first started working out at the Y. I felt all alone and didn't know anyone there, but I've been going for almost 8 months now and I know so many people and they're becoming very friendly. Just hang in there with it and don't give up.

Come here for support. Post often and know that we are all with you and here for you. Don't give up and don't give in.
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Old 07-27-2003, 10:09 PM   #12
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oh princess... BREATHE. AND remember that you are worth the effort.

so what if the WW group doesn't feel warm and fuzzy right now??? someone else new will join at some point and you can support each other.

but it really sounds as if you have absolutely no one to talk to out there... it happens everywhere, even in big cities... may i suggest not only posting here, but also staring one of the on line journals? lots of people use them to work out ISSUES. and you can keep your entries private, if you prefer.

but remember, no matter how many friends you have, no matter how many walking buddies you have, bottom line: YOU have to walk the walk, YOU have to make sure that you stay on program, YOU have to make the right choices. and it really doesn't matter what other people think or don't think.

and you also need to keep yourself first in your life.

please hang out here... it'll be fun. honest!!!
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Old 07-28-2003, 12:50 AM   #13
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You all are soooooo wonderful! I can't believe how many people responded to my post and so quickly! I will try to write more tomorrow... been a long day... but I wanted to Thank all of you and tell you I will make it and you all will see me through! Nicole
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Old 07-28-2003, 08:08 AM   #14
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Nicole,

Welcome! Please come here and post often.

I know it's hurtful that you don't have support at the meetings. I bet you will over time., it you go back and try again. It's very hard when you don't know anyone. But not everyone started off knowing each other-it's not like high school with set cliques. Maybe try just going up to someone and sitting next to them. Talk a little if you want. I'm really shy, so I know what you're going through. I'll bet there are other people there who want to talk but haven't made the first move yet either.

You can always come here for someone to talk with. I bet once you get out more you will meet more people. If they're worth bothering with, they will talk with you because of who you are and what you have to offer.

Take care,
sherry
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Old 07-28-2003, 04:49 PM   #15
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i'll be 25 in september too! i agree with a lot of what has already been said. you should give WW another try. i was kinda nervous about starting but once i did and started talking to people at my meetings i realized they are all just awesome. it also helps if the leader is great. what did you think about your leader?
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