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Old 08-14-2014, 06:26 PM   #436
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Jessica--great job on your exercise and on your weight! You are inspiring!

Uber--I like your new mantra--"success without kryptonite"! I agree there has to be a way to lose without being perfect all the time... Interesting, too, what you posted about Rockin' Robin. I really appreciated her wisdom and advice, but I wasn't around when she disappeared, though. A 3FC Mystery...

Mandy--the chicken sounds delicious. I will have to try it.

Laurie--I really appreciate your insights and your zen attitude.

I am continuing to get back on track, and it feels good. I am really trying to adjust my "all or nothing" thinking (i.e., if I slip, I go off the deep end). It has always been an issue for me, but I think I am starting to realize how much it has come to dominate my recent thinking.

Thanks everyone for all of the good posts.
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Old 08-14-2014, 07:08 PM   #437
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Hey peoples! I've come to the realization that if I don't post in the mornings at work, the day gets away from me and before I know it time has passed and I haven't checked in. I've started this post like a million times in the last few days and then gotten side-tracked by life but finally here it is.

martini: OMG I majorly heart Lisa Eldridge- I'm a subbie on YT but my favourite is Wayne Goss (gossmakeupartist). I'm also pretty new to the makeup game. I had never owned a foundation before 2012 and now the only place I go without at least a bit of powder and lipstick is the gym. I can't do winged eyeliner yet either... I hope you figure out the other relationship stuff out soon. This journey is hard enough in the best of spirits but when there's internal stuff going on, it's terrible.

FeraFilia: The internet is a funny place with people who will comment on your life as if they know you intimately even when you don't share your private feelings with them. When you actually ask for opinions... Goodness, you open pandora's box with the sorts of things you'll get. People will troll ANYTHING. Take the comments you find helpful and discard the others. It's not easy and it can be hurtful but just ignore them. You will never have everyone's approval. Yayyyy on your 3-monthaversary back on track! I loathe moving but you seem pretty organized and that's awesome! I haven't had a crockpot meal since I lived in America last maybe 5 years ago. That chicken sounded delicious!!!

ubegirl: I think your head map is a succint description of my struggles. I'm constantly between 3 and 4 and I need to have some Kryptonite. Maybe not all Kryptonite because even in my original weight loss journey when I was super disciplined, Sundays were my "free" day, but I need to be Kryptonite at least 80% of the time. Honestly this could be your book angle if you ever decide to in on the weight loss publishing industry money-making machine. I struggle with vacations as well but I think a plan to maintain is an excellent one!

LaurieDawn: Momzilla was definitely the kick in the pants I needed. That and the results of my dress fitting. Sometimes we need a little external pressure to get started. My original impetus to start was the 275-lb mark on the scale which to me looked really close to 300. I've been alarmed at the rising number on my scale this year but obviously not enough and no wonder. I saw scale readings in the 200s for 90% of my life, the current numbers are not alarming enough to my brain. I hope your salad at the lunch date wasn't too bad and that it was fun. Hopefully your whoosh comes soon. Also, you're totally right about sometimes being able to enjoy a meal. I love food and think it's a blessing- maybe I overindulge and abuse it at times, but that's on me, and I have to work on that. I would never want to lose the enthusiasm totally for a blessing so tasty!

[Slashni: I love eating out- that's totally my indulgence and I'm easily tempted so suggesting Subway is a great alternative. At least I know what I'm getting there and it's filling. I've heard a lot of people rate Body Pump highly and although we don't have Body Pump where I live and I'm not generally a "class" person, people rate it highly enough that next time I'm in America or a "Western" country, I'll give it a go. People will always have excuses about why they can't eat right or exercise- I should know, when I'm off plan, I have a million exercises. My take is similar to yours regarding your friend: that everyone has to come to their EIE state of readiness by themselves. Nothing I can ever say or do will ever influence them, if anything it will rub them off the wrong way. I know that's how it feels for me when I'm the off-plan, excuse-making one. The best one can do is offer support for whenever the person is ready and maybe offer invites to do physical activity together.

garnetrising: Yayyyy on the shrinking waist measurements! The scale was messing with you, see! The 2-teens have come with a vengeance! Yay!!!! I do the multiple weighings in minutes thing too and pick the nicest number- often I think my scale must be like "Chick Please!" Congrats on hitting a new distance! That's awesome! What are your laps like? Is it a track? Or loops in a park or neighbourhood?

LotusMama: Consistency is the name of the game. I've got 1 week on plan and it's showing on the scale. The next step is to keep consistent the next week as well. That's all we can do I suppose.

jenjenangel: I hope your little one is alright what with hitting her head. Our bodies are so odd (especially as women) what with the way the retain water here and lose weight today and gain tomorrow for sometimes no explicable reason. On the bright side you've seen a pattern and can plan your weigh-in days appropriately maybe.


If you've made it this far down this epistle.... THE DREADED DRESS FITTING went as awfully as it could. The dress was too small. I was forced to switch with another bridesmaid who had lost weight and so officially I'm now the largest bridesmaid in the party in the largest dress. AND the dress was still too small and has to be amended. I get it back tomorrow. The bride was like- "it's okay Toasted, the dresses run REALLY small," the bride's mother gave me the evilest side eye you will ever see but said nothing. Yesterday (Wednesday) was the bridal shower and a lot of fun. I felt pretty saintly because I did pretty well with eating right without being obnoxious and obvious about it. I did not feel excessively chubby till I saw the pictures on Facebook but it is what it is.

I had planned to eat no-carb until the wedding but I'm back on carbs. Mostly because I have an irritable bowel and I've had terrible heartburn, so bad it's giving me a sore throat and I can't tell why- all that's been different is eating a boatload of protein (chicken, meat and fish) which is a trigger for even laidback stomachs so I've had to come off that and I had a (measured amount) of bread for dinner. It WAS amazing! Bread is ambrosia! I didn't even butter or jam it- so as not to lose that amazing pure bread-y taste. There was an egg-white omelet too but I had to force that down. I'm down to 184.5 by this morning's weigh in so my whoosh has come and I'm going to keep on keeping on. Between work and the bridal party commitments, this week has been hectic. I can't wait till Saturday evening to just sleep!

I hope everyone is doing well and everything is going well for you guys. Have a happy, healthy, on-plan rest of the day y'all!
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Old 08-14-2014, 07:35 PM   #438
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Jessica-Awesome job on your running!!!

Laurie...your totally getting there...and props for opting out of surgery...I did too....I thought all around it was a better choice.

Diane...I can totally relate...I am so sore from walking all day but I am going to try and get on the treadmill tonight uggg LOL

Jessica...wooohoooo! And that scale would drive me batty also!

Lotusmama...keep on going you are doing great!

Toasted...thank you for the comment on my daughter she is better today thank goodness....and I am sorry about the dreadfull dress But you are doing great! Oh look up carb cycle that is what I am doing by Chris Powell...I love it! I do LC Monday-Friday...and HC on weekends...makes me feel like I am not even on a diet!

I worked today and my legs are sore from zoo walking! As of this morning I am still at 238.5 so hopefully those pounds come off before Sat morning!
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Old 08-14-2014, 07:59 PM   #439
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Just a quick drive by posting while I take a 5 minute break from packing...

I have been packing ALL DAY. I pretty much was so busy I forgot to eat until well after 4pm, and now it's almost 8 and I still need to make dinner.

BUT. I got 4 large boxes of books packed up and ready to go. Along with several small appliances, most of my clothes, most of my shoes, and all the jewelry I rarely wear. I have tomorrow, and then the 26th - 29th or so to get everything ready to go. The container will be here on the evening of the 28th, my parents will be here on the 29th and then loading commences!

And before all of that happens, I have to survive 10 days of staying with my mother in law. :P

Gotta go make dinner. Have a great evening y'all.
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Old 08-14-2014, 08:51 PM   #440
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I got my siggy!!!!
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Old 08-15-2014, 01:28 AM   #441
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Toasted--the dress fitting sounds rough and I am sorry to hear it. I have been a bridesmaid many, many times and, even when I weighed much less, detested the fittings. There are few things I like less than that, actually. When I look at your stats, though, I can't imagine you looking anything but terrific! Seriously.

Here is my clothing related nightmare: I am attending a multi-day event with my daughter at the end of the month. T-shirts were included in the registration price (one for her and one for me). I ordered a large for me. Last time that I lost a lot of weight (4 years ago) I liked having some t-shirts that actually fit as the weight came off (as opposed to having all XLs or larger). So, I figured I would just put the t-shirt away until it fit me. I got an email yesterday that said that parents and children are required to wear the t-shirts the entire weekend of the event!! What?!! I contacted the organizer and asked if I could make my shirt an XL. I felt really ridiculous... In any event, they told me that I contacted them just in time and they changed the order, so at least I will have an XL t-shirt. I predict that even an XL will be pretty snug on me as it is and I don't look forward to wearing an ill-fitting shirt all weekend. Ugh.

Amazingly, I have an internet connection at home tonight. It is still coming and going which is maddening. I have never had problems with an internet connection like this and have spent a fair amount of money already fixing what I thought was wrong. Grrr.

Good night all!
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Old 08-15-2014, 12:09 PM   #442
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220.6.

I totally got bitten by Martini's tiger yesterday. Or my tiger that Martini described so well. I felt so good and so Kryptonitish yesterday. I was hungry all day, but tamed it with 160 calories worth of tuna because I knew I was going to eat a relatively high-cal dinner. I then went for a less-than-stellar run, but still a run. Then, I planned on making French toast and bacon for dinner for the family (by request), but with a lot of fruit to accompany it and to serve as my primary calorie source. My plan was to have a single piece of French toast and one or two pieces of bacon along with a generous serving of fruit. I even started with the fruit. For a long time, I have been able to eat a small portion of decadent food, just enough to be "normal" and feel "normal full." Last night, I felt totally out of control. After the fruit, I had a piece of French toast and several pieces of bacon. And then more bacon. And more French toast. I even started doing that thing I do, where I tear off a small piece of food, pretending like I was going to just have a bit, but knowing that I would go back for more until it was all gone. And when I finally stopped myself from eating and we cleared the food and put everything away, I wanted to go back to the fridge and eat all the left-over bacon. But I also felt the compulsion to eat in secret. So, I planned on waiting until my husband went up to take a shower. He got distracted with something, so I told him that I would take the first shower, and in my head, I planned to come back downstairs and eat "just one piece" of bacon when he was in the shower, though I knew that it would be more. Fortunately, it took forever to floss out all the bacon that had gotten stuck between my teeth, and that, combined with the minty toothpaste flavor, stopped my urge to indulge in an all-out secret binge that I knew would have continued until I could physically hold no more. But I had still eaten enough that I woke up at 3:00 a.m. feeling like I wanted to vomit. Even now, at 10:30 in the morning, I feel like vomiting, but I still had to stop myself from grabbing bacon on my way out the door this morning.

So, today is going to be about wrestling the tiger back into its cage. It will not go willingly. For now, my nausea is protecting me. But that will be replaced by a crippling hunger at some point today. I know, cuz this is not my first rodeo. So, here is my plan. I have blueberries at work today and a work function with "all-you-can-eat hamburgers and hot dogs" as well as chips and other junk food tonight. I will drink 120 ounces of water and eat however many blueberries I want up to the pint I have in my work fridge. I will then eat a single hamburger at the work function and be done eating for today. (I am actually pretty good at avoiding food in the presence of other people -- an advantage of my disordered eating, I suppose.) Sometime this evening, I will plan and measure low-calorie, nutrition-dense, balanced food for tomorrow and Sunday and only eat those things I have planned to eat. I need to get below 220, and I need to get it under containment before I have to do the starting-all-over thing, which is absolutely the hardest phase for me.

Martini - It has got to be so amazing to live in Asia and participate in the culture there. And, as described above, I know exactly what you mean about that tiger. But I know I can't be Kryptonite all the time, so it's my only option beyond altering my physical body to punish me every time I indulge.

Mandy - I need you to organize my next move! Sounds like everything is going well. And congrats on your third month anniversary. Can't wait to celebrate with you on your sixth month anniversary.

Diane - Isn't it great that it feels weird not to work out? Sometimes, the body needs a rest day. I have found that pushing through and not giving my body needed rests can result in becoming almost immobile for a few days.

Lotus - The internet thing you've got going on would make me crazy! The "all or nothing" thing is a huge weakness for me too. But the not giving up is our strength. =)

Toasted - That woman drives me nuts and I have never even met her. Side-eye, eh? Sorry about the dress fitting nightmare. Glad your friend is gracious and kind. But I admit that I am glad Momzilla gave you the kick in the pants you needed to be back on this train. And I'm very glad you're here.

Jen - I may investigate this Chris Powell thing. I kinda like to sample different plans. The newness helps reinvigorate my efforts sometimes. Here's hoping the scale tomorrow brings you some good news. =)

And my epistle is complete. I gotta tell you - I feel more exposed here than even in my therapist's office. I let all y'all into the craziest parts of my brain, and acknowledge habits that I perceive as shameful. As tragic as Robin Williams's death was and is, I do appreciate knowing that I'm not the only one who works to seem "normal" when I know I'm not. Thanks to everyone here for absorbing the craziness I throw out. It helps me be less crazy, and I really need some of that. =)
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Old 08-15-2014, 12:15 PM   #443
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Hi all!

Well, yesterday just sucked!! It really messed with my head with not going to do any workout yesterday. While I still believe it was the right thing to do because of my leg soreness, I was totally out of sorts all day. At one point at work, I was teary-eyed. I don't know why, but I was so sad. And, I didn't stay on plan with eating. It was just awful. I can't do that again. I do have a rest day every week, but an unplanned rest day is just not going to cut it for me. I was reading on myfitnesspal yesterday, trying to get some guidance, and it just so happened that someone else posted how guilty she felt when she took an unplanned rest day. Anyway, someone posted about doing an "active recovery" workout instead of a full blown rest day. In other words, ride one of the bikes or get on the treadmill, but just do it at a much slower pace, with no inclines, etc. Or swim slowly. Just avoid a really hard workout. So, that's what I'll do next time, if it happens again. My avatar over on mfp is a quote: "You're one workout away from a good mood." I guess that really fits for me. Went to spin this morning and I feel so much better. I don't know if I really have a healthy relationship with working out, but I guess that's just the way it will be for now. So much happier today.

Martini: I like your analogy with the tiger, but the other way to look at it might be that as time goes on, your walk with the tiger may be training the tiger to be more under control. So, when you first try to walk the tiger, when you're new to being on plan, the tiger has the upper hand. But as you stay more on plan, and you have those moments when you take the tiger out for a walk, you are in control. You decide when to stop walking the tiger and getting back on plan. I think it is something we all can learn to do!

Lotus: I'm glad you were able to get the t-shirt changed. That would have been torture to have a too small t-shirt all weekend. UGH!

Mandy: I so don't envy you having to pack. You have a great attitude though and I'm sure it is exciting to be moving ahead!

Jen: Congrats on the siggy! And good luck with the next weigh in!

Toasted: Ugh. Dress fittings. That sounded horrible. I only had one bridesmaid dress, in my sister's wedding. I hated every minute of that. It was a nice dress, though, and fortunately was elastic waist and flowing skirt.

Jessica: I don't know how you handle your scale issues. That would make me crazy!! But, you are obviously losing, so GREAT news!!!

LaurieDawn: You have a great attitude about the scale right now! We could all learn from you! Well done!
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Old 08-15-2014, 12:16 PM   #444
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Final tally on yesterday: 5 largeish boxes of books, 3 trash bags full of stuffed animals, 4 small appliances, 4 large tubs (2 clothes, 2 shoes), 4 pieces of luggage full of clothes, and a few other miscellaneous boxes are packed and ready.

I also did 2 loads of laundry.

Then I slept like a baby. Ha!

Gotta get packing today, and the clothes I pack for our trip this coming week, will be all the clothes we don't pack, and will just live out of our luggage for a while so we can get everything else packed up.

Next week, it will be all crock pot meals or sandwiches or take out because all of my pots and pans will be loaded up. Maybe we can borrow a small pot and skillet from someone for a couple days. Or I'll leave one of each out so I'll have them when we get where we're going so I can make dinner.

Trying to decide how I'm going to handle my weight loss efforts during this time. Between traveling, packing, and moving, I'm probably not going to lose much (actually, scale says I've gained - just a tiny bit, not even a pound - though it's probably water, because I'm definitely sore from moving all the heavy boxes of books around!), and with all the "quick" food I'll be eating, I know there will be some sodium related retention. I might just take the next 3 weeks and call it a "maintenance" break, and hope I can keep my weight level over that period. Just try to be mindful of what I'm eating, and keep my activity level where it has been, and it shouldn't be a problem... right?!

Anyway, time to go put some boxes together, and pull out the big luggage.

Have a great day y'all!
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MiniGoals:
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Old 08-15-2014, 02:53 PM   #445
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Hello all, I was on here over a year ago and I am returning. I actually lost almost 40 pounds before.....and then I gained it all back! Ugh! I wish it was as hard to gain back as it was to lose! I am starting back at the same weight as before, 281. Actually, I have lost down to 274.4. This means I've met my first goal, which is to be under the 100lbs to lose mark. I am shooting for 175 before I set a final goal. I hope to stick with it better this time and I need motivation to exercise and walk/run.....I haven't started any of that yet. I haven't even told my husband that I am on a diet yet. With his work schedule, right now, he is barley home and is very detracted when he is. It will be better in a coupe of weeks but I am trying to lose enough that he can begin to see it!
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Old 08-15-2014, 04:53 PM   #446
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Lotus - Thanks for that. And I think adjusting the way you think about things is vitally important to permanent success as is gaining a deeper understanding of yourself and your body.

I'm sorry about the clothing nightmare. Who knows, though, you've still got two weeks and maybe the t-shirt won't fit quite as snugly as you're expecting it to.

Toasted - My multiple weigh-ins come from my scale being psycho. I can have it very as much as 5 lbs in, literally, a matter of seconds. So I have to take several weights and average them to give myself the best estimate of where I really am. It can be trying but the scale is neither actually mine nor can I currently afford one of my own so it is what it is.

Congrats on being down on the scale, by the way, and don't stress over the dress. It is what it is and while it would have been nice if it had worked out perfectly, the more important thing is to not let the upset derail your success.

Jenni - I know! I'm so proud of myself... I'm anxious to see how far I can make it today! And congrats on your siggy!

Mandy - Packing can be the worst. I know that you'll be fine while visiting with your mother-in-law, though. It may be best to focus on maintaining for a little while while you're coping with all the changes. If you lose, that's great but that way if you stall, at least you'll be planning for that.

Martini - Thank you. Hopefully the move itself isn't stressful and just knowing about the tiger is a step toward learning how to manage that 90% on / 10% off eating plan.

Diane - I can relate to that. It's one of the reasons I really push to get in some sort of exercise every day. That way when I'm having a bad day it might just help fix the problem. I'm sorry yesterday was so rough for you. Here's to hoping today goes better.

JB - Welcome to our thread. We can all relate to the regain issues, so you're in good company.

Laurie - For the sound of it, you're in good company. I think yesterday was hard on a lot of people. I don't know what might be contributing to the tiger bite from yesterday but you've got a plan for this weekend and I know that you can stick with it. I was thinking about you today and I'm wondering if you've just hit one of those small stalls that you get before a huge whoosh. It might be worth it to take a look over your numbers and see if there isn't some pattern there. If there is, it might help ease the tiger back into its cage?


So, after the 214.0 and 215.0 lbs that it showed me the first two times I stepped on it, the scale seems to have settled solidly on 217.2 lbs. That being said, I'm only giving myself the 218.6 lbs that I saw yesterday. I'm reluctant to accept that 217.2 lbs as real but that's the way I am and we all know it. It's got me wondering how low it's going to bottom out on Monday, though, and nervous about how high it'll jump for Tuesday's weigh-in. :/
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Old 08-15-2014, 04:59 PM   #447
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Hi, Jb and welcome back! You are in good company here; a lot of support and insight. I just came back to 3FC about a month ago. I lost between 50 and 55 pounds 4 years ago...I gained it back plus about 20 more.

Martini--I started to type a post this morning about your tiger analogy and then got pulled away with something at work, so i didn't get to complete it. Your post was spot on.

Laurie--I could also completely relate to everything you said. All of it rings so true for me. I admire you for getting right back on track though; that is what is going to get you where you need to be.

Sorry for the short post, but I am leaving work for the day! Have a great weekend everyone.
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Old 08-15-2014, 11:56 PM   #448
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Hey y'all...

I'm having one of those weird moments that I'm sure some of you (if not all of you) can relate to... and can help me get over the bump.

I was thinking back to the last time I saw family. It was right around the time I got back to losing weight, and I'd only lost a few pounds at that point. I'm currently 11% smaller than I was when I first started. I was wondering if anyone would notice and comment, and how I'd react if they did.

Then I got to thinking "well, I've *only* lost 36 pounds, not like that's a lot or anything"... I know I should be thinking more along the lines of "holy smokes! I've lost almost 40 pounds!" instead of acting like it's no big deal. But looking at HOW MUCH I have left to lose 36 just seems like such a paltry amount, and nothing to be excited about.

I'm gonna go find something that weighs 35-40 pounds in my apartment and carry it around for a minute to show myself how much I've lost and hopefully that will put me back into a more positive state of mind.
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New book every 10 lbs!
MiniGoals:
299 (Under 300!)(DONE! 7/25/14) ~ 270 ("obese") ~ 245 (previous low) ~ 230 ("overweight" + 100lbs lost) ~ 199 (Onederland!!!) ~ 169 ("healthy")
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Old 08-16-2014, 01:12 AM   #449
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Mandy.....5 year old weighs 42 pounds at 4 ft you have almost lost her that is a huge deal

I have to give myself props I went to bunco tonight. There was chips, cookies, cake, popcorn, candy to name a few and I had nothing drank my water and resisted temptation.....a lady even gave me a box of cookies for my kids and I handed them to them and had none . Feeling good!
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Starting weight 250 7/21/14
Mini goals: 5% goal (237.5) met 8/14/14, 230 met 9/18/14, 10% goal (225) met 10/13/2014, 219, 15% goal (212.5), 206, 20% (200), 199
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Jenni



New Year Challenge 9/15/14-1/1/15


"Success is not final. Failure is not fatal. It is the courage to continue that counts." - Unknown.

Last edited by jenjenangel027 : 08-16-2014 at 10:53 AM.
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Old 08-16-2014, 10:57 AM   #450
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Location: Oregon
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S/C/G: 250/160

Height: 5'6

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Just quick here today as I am a toasted lobster from the sun I have bright red hair and fair skin I used sunblock but still got it good!!!!!

Laurie...your post touched me I think many of us go through those moments but it's the getting back to it that really counts we all fall but getting up and following it through is what kicks those binges booties!!! You can do this girl!

Down 2.2 this week!
__________________
Starting weight 250 7/21/14
Mini goals: 5% goal (237.5) met 8/14/14, 230 met 9/18/14, 10% goal (225) met 10/13/2014, 219, 15% goal (212.5), 206, 20% (200), 199
_______________________
Jenni



New Year Challenge 9/15/14-1/1/15


"Success is not final. Failure is not fatal. It is the courage to continue that counts." - Unknown.
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