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Those who have lost a lot of weight - did you go through feeling like an imposter?

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Old 04-04-2014, 09:40 PM   #1
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Wink Those who have lost a lot of weight - did you go through feeling like an imposter?

As you can see, I've lost just over 100 lbs. Just curious if anyone else who has lost a lot of weight ever went through a time of feeling like an imposter of sorts.

When I go to the store to shop for new clothes, my instinct is to head towards the plus size department. But nothing there fits me. I know that I wear a 14/L/XL in the misses department. Intellectually, I know that. I've ended up ordering so much online, because I'm actually experiencing anxiety in the store. It's crazy! I'm not an anxious person by nature, but my heart starts beating fast, and I feel like I have to look quickly and grab whatever clothes I can before someone SEES me in the REGULAR department. Hahaha. I sound nuts!! Surely, this will pass.....RIGHT??

Anybody else experience anything like this?? Anybody? Please tell me I'm not alone in this!
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Old 04-04-2014, 09:44 PM   #2
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I don't have feelings of being an imposter there, but I DEFINITELY do in the fitness store. "What's that fatty doing looking at fitness clothes? Like she uses those... sure... right!" So, I feel like a fitness imposter. :-)

It will get better though and you will start to not even glance at the Plus sizes and the whole new world of super cute clothes will open up.

I just had to go to the plus section today to buy clothes - and it was all awful... and I just looked longingly at the clothes I "could" be wearing if I hadn't derailed!
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Old 04-05-2014, 12:47 AM   #3
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I can't wait to feel like an imposter! Congrats btw. What an inspiration!
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Old 04-05-2014, 07:03 PM   #4
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I feel a bit of an impostor when someone close to me who needs to lose weight looks to me for answers

I read all the stuff on 3FC of how people count every single gram of fat/carb/protein and know soooo much information on everything about nutrition, and i have to tell them "ummm I ate about 1/3 of what I normally would...ummm cut back on sweets, ate more veg....uhhh went for a walk now and again" LOL I feel a bit of a fraud!
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Old 04-05-2014, 09:22 PM   #5
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I feel like an impostor at the produce section, or buying protein bars and shakes at the store. I think "people looking at me buying this stuff might think I'm just pretending that I eat them, and then chug down a whole pizza by myself" or something like that. I feel a bit out of place buying healthy stuff, and feel like people are looking and judging, and going like "yeah, riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight! you'd only eat that if it were smeared in chocolate!"

I haven't gone clothes shopping since I started losing so I don't know how I'll feel about that.
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Old 04-05-2014, 11:56 PM   #6
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I still see myself as fat and I've lost 90lbs. A counselor told me that was very normal and it will take time to change perspective.
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Old 04-06-2014, 12:19 AM   #7
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I can't say that I feel like an imposter. I do not feel that different except I am healthier, more mobile, and more interested in fashion. I love it when I run into people I haven't seen for awhile, and they don't recognize me. That makes my day. I have been on this journey for about 8 years. Maybe I have just been getting used to it as I go along.
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Old 04-06-2014, 05:59 AM   #8
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I do feel like an imposter. Like I want to be who I used to be...but SOOO MANY PEOPLE DON'T KNOW THAT VERSION OF ME!
Like they will think....who's this girl? We don't know her. May be we didn't know her in the first place.
And I can't stop pondering...who am I? Will I still be same person? What's expecting me at the end of the journey?
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Old 04-06-2014, 08:51 AM   #9
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I am well acquainted with that feeling of being a fraud either in the "normal" size department or just in my smaller skin in general. But once you realize and accept that you are WORTHY of being who you are, in that moment, I think it falls away and you get used to it.
But, that sense of worthiness I think is an unspoken hurdle that a lot of us have to deal with at some point. It wasn't until I made that revelation that I didn't feel worthy of being thin my whole life, was I able to adjust my philosophy and continue on losing weight with confidence.
Remember, you are 200% worthy to shop in the normal section of a clothing store AND to you are worthy to be any smaller size you want!
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Old 04-06-2014, 08:52 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by berryblondeboys View Post
I don't have feelings of being an imposter there, but I DEFINITELY do in the fitness store. "What's that fatty doing looking at fitness clothes? Like she uses those... sure... right!" So, I feel like a fitness imposter. :-)

It will get better though and you will start to not even glance at the Plus sizes and the whole new world of super cute clothes will open up.

I just had to go to the plus section today to buy clothes - and it was all awful... and I just looked longingly at the clothes I "could" be wearing if I hadn't derailed!
This!!!
I just had this experience a few weeks ago when I bought a pair of running shoes. The girl who was helping me was probably 18, thin and outwardly perfect, and she was asking me what my activity level was. She kept trying to push great "walking" shoes on me and I kept insisting I needed shoes that would be great for some running as well. I ended up going somewhere else, showing the sales person the pair I wanted, buying them, and rushing out. One mortifying experience was enough!
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Old 04-06-2014, 04:29 PM   #11
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Quote:
I've ended up ordering so much online, because I'm actually experiencing anxiety in the store. It's crazy! I'm not an anxious person by nature, but my heart starts beating fast, and I feel like I have to look quickly and grab whatever clothes I can before someone SEES me in the REGULAR department.
That is me. I can't believe how anxious shopping in the normal section makes me. I feel like people are laughing at me behind my back, and I can just imagine someone saying "Look at that woman. Does she actually think that she should shop in this department." I keep thinking that someone will come up to me to tell me where the "women's" department is.
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Old 04-06-2014, 07:14 PM   #12
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I guess I can relate in a way. I think someone mentioned something similar to this in how they felt out of place at the gym.

For me it's make up and selfies. I'm in my 20's so of course selfies are the norm with ALL of my friends. It's practically a selfie a DAY on instagram. I hate taking pictures of myself because I feel like I look terrible in them, so whenever I have had to take a selfie of myself, I feel really fake, awkward, and forced doing it. Like people will think, "Hahaha, what a ridiculous selfie! She looks awful!"

Same thing with make up. Im self-conscious wearing make up because my entire life I've worried that I would be made fun of or that people would think, "Oh, look at that fat girl TRYING to make herself look pretty when she looks awful anyway."
Because of this I never got comfortable enough to even try make up, and now I'm in my 20s and worry that since I didn't go through all my make up mess ups in middle school and high school Im going to look ridiculous with badly done makeup once I try to wear make up when Im closer to goal and feel confident enough to dress up and show myself off.
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Old 04-06-2014, 07:37 PM   #13
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Ahh....finally, people who get me! I can relate to so much of this.

Especially...

Quote:
Originally Posted by levoguette View Post
I'm in my 20's so of course selfies are the norm with ALL of my friends. It's practically a selfie a DAY on instagram.
I'm in my 20's also, and I just don't understand the whole selfie thing. Sure, everybody is going to take a picture of themselves at some point, but I think it's nuts the AMOUNT of pictures that some people take and post.

I'm a pretty confident person, and I always have been. That's one of the reasons that I found these feelings so strange. I have never been one to feel "unworthy" of something because of my size. I just have to laugh at myself sometimes. This losing weight business is a strange experience indeed.

Oh, also, I went shopping yesterday with much less anxiety and got some really great things for spring/summer. Only a few moments when I felt I needed to duck and run, LOL.
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Old 04-06-2014, 10:34 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by onagain1 View Post
I'm a pretty confident person, and I always have been. That's one of the reasons that I found these feelings so strange. I have never been one to feel "unworthy" of something because of my size. I just have to laugh at myself sometimes. This losing weight business is a strange experience indeed.

Oh, also, I went shopping yesterday with much less anxiety and got some really great things for spring/summer. Only a few moments when I felt I needed to duck and run, LOL.
If you put even the most confident person outside of their comfort zone they're confidence could falter! Makes sense to me. Maybe deep down you felt out of place shopping at the regular section since you've been shopping plus size for so long!
I don't have a problem with the clothing section, because I always tried to squeeze my fat self in any XL top or whatever from the regular section that was slightly "cut bigger" since they're clothes are cuter than plus size.
But I do feel out of place and uncomfortable walking around in make up stores and it's mostly because of how pushy the sales people are, can't I just look at the product without you wanting to sell me things I don't want or need!? I already feel timid enough just being there without them chasing me with product.

If you feel that way again I would recommend trying to shop at a time where there's less of a crowd and maybe even try checking out a new mall where nobody you knows really hangs out that way you won't have to worry about running into anyone you know. Plus, checking out a new place you haven't been before can be fun!
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