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Setting Myself up For Failure?

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Old 11-04-2013, 01:55 PM   #1
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Default Setting Myself up For Failure?

Hi All,

I am new to this forum, but not new to struggling with my weight. It's been a battle of mine since junior high (I am now 27). My weight has sky rocketed over the last few years... I'm now at a point where I am twice what my body weight should be. Not only is it hard on an emotional level, but it is also starting to take it's toll on my health. I have developed really bad arthritis in my knee, as well as high blood pressure, PCOS, and just general constant fatigue. Not to mention how I am huffing and puffing just walking through the parking lot to my car!

I am here because I have tried and failed way too many times. I need a support system. I need people to help me be realistic about my goals, and remind me that sometimes the journey is the prize. I need to stop setting myself up for failure and start embracing the little goals, the struggles, and everything that comes along with it. From what I've read, this seems like the right place to be.

Any advice, tips, encouragement, or motivation would be greatly appreciated! Thanks in advance!!!
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Old 11-04-2013, 02:32 PM   #2
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Hi Smiley -

You really are in the right place. I have been coming here on and off for a while (I've had some success, not as much as I'd like), and it's great because everyone is warm, caring, and understands the journey.

Keep at it, keep coming back, and I now you will have success.
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Old 11-04-2013, 04:32 PM   #3
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Hey Smiley! Welcome! I'm 26, and have also had (and continue to have) a significant amount to lose. You can do this! I'm on my way, still learning to move past my mistakes without falling into "eff-it mode", I wish you the best, feel free to message me if you'd like an accountability partner!
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Old 11-04-2013, 07:09 PM   #4
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Welcome and good luck on your journey!!
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Old 11-05-2013, 06:32 AM   #5
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Hey smileygirlmel...you've started! Yay you!
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Old 11-05-2013, 10:36 AM   #6
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I hate the idea that failure is trying and not getting the exact results in the exact time frame that you would prefer. I am totally with bSpring3 here. You've started. You're already a success! It's so hard to start. Now to figure out the next steps. And the next and the next and the next. And to figure out how to deal with the missteps and mistakes you will make. And guess what? You have already learned so much about what works and what doesn't work from your past attempts.

This is a great place to be! I can't wait to cheer you on as you progress and succeed.
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Old 11-05-2013, 11:30 AM   #7
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Welcome to the club! I have been an on/off member for years, and I have a lot of success and a lot of failures! I have made horrible mistakes, and I have achieved a lot of great accomplishments! It takes personal commitment and accountability. This board helps fill in the rest. You are NOT setting yourself up for failure. You started posting - that's a great accomplishment! It's something you have never done in all the previous attempts- so that speaks volumes that this time you are already attacking the challenge with new ammo.

You can do this - we all can! It's just the mind games and environmental situations that try to alter our course, but that can be said about most challenges in life. You are strong and capable! Just lean on the board, especially during the first phases. I have found that when I stop logging in, I get off track and gain weight. When I am here and holding myself accountable, I stay on track. When I'm running or eating health food and my mind is ready to give in, I think about this board and all the success stories. If I feel I'm veering off course, I log in and quickly surf the threads, post a couple times, seek guidance, read the stories, etc and I am quickly reminded how much I want to lose weight!

Good luck in your journey!
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Old 11-05-2013, 05:04 PM   #8
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Hi smiley!!!
Fellow cyster here! Im right with you too dang hormones!!!
We do have a pcos board if you havent found it, its not hugely active but its there!!!!
you can do this!!
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Old 11-05-2013, 06:54 PM   #9
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Wow... to say I am overwhelmed by the responses and all of the support would be an understatement. You guys are fantastic! I have surfed around lots of different weight loss boards, and many of them don't have members that are encouraging each other the way this board has.

I'm definitely trying to stay positive on this journey. It's so easy to get discouraged when it gets hard or just because you know you have a long ways to go (130 lbs!). But having you guys and this board for motivation will go a long way for me! I appreciate each and every one of your responses so much! Thank you!!!
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Old 11-05-2013, 07:19 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lecomtes View Post
Hey Smiley! Welcome! I'm 26, and have also had (and continue to have) a significant amount to lose. You can do this! I'm on my way, still learning to move past my mistakes without falling into "eff-it mode", I wish you the best, feel free to message me if you'd like an accountability partner!
Hey there! Thanks so much for the encouragement! I did try to pm you about being accountability partners but it looks like I can't send private messages until I've posted 10 times (this is only my third). I'll keep working towards 10 posts, but if you'd like to PM me in the meantime that would be awesome!
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Old 11-06-2013, 12:41 PM   #11
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This forum is seriously such a helpful place. I joined first a few years ago and, not to demotivate you, but I actually joined and continue gaining weight because I was still learning the best way of eating for myself. I finally found it, but this forum really kept me going even through gains and through periods of depression and low self worth.

I can't explain how great this forum has been for me.
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Old 11-06-2013, 02:17 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thewalrus0 View Post
This forum is seriously such a helpful place. I joined first a few years ago and, not to demotivate you, but I actually joined and continue gaining weight because I was still learning the best way of eating for myself. I finally found it, but this forum really kept me going even through gains and through periods of depression and low self worth.

I can't explain how great this forum has been for me.


I'll admit I was a little disappointed when I saw there were so many people here that gained the weight back. But I have to remind myself, this is a support forum- here to support those that come looking for it. Losing weight is a lifestyle change, and my guess is people allow themselves to drift away from these types of forums when they reach or get close to their goal. I think it's easier to lose accountability and focus then and get back into old habits.
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Old 11-06-2013, 02:47 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by smileygirlmel View Post
I'll admit I was a little disappointed when I saw there were so many people here that gained the weight back. But I have to remind myself, this is a support forum- here to support those that come looking for it. Losing weight is a lifestyle change, and my guess is people allow themselves to drift away from these types of forums when they reach or get close to their goal. I think it's easier to lose accountability and focus then and get back into old habits.
You hit the nail on the head. I lost crazy amounts of weight by joining challenges on here, staying accountable, having some friendly competition with regular posters who were at the same place as me, etc. Once I stopped posting, I eventually got back into my old habits and re-gained. It's not that this place makes you gain- it's that you don't keep up with the accountability and the focus and drift away from all the healthier habits (i.e. posting, focusing, dieting, exercising, etc) and the weight piles back on.

Good luck! To all of us!
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Old 11-06-2013, 02:53 PM   #14
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You got this. And we got your back.

This forum has been very helpful for me.

It helped me turn small steps into big changes.

Make new friends.

Stay accountable.

And keep the weight off (for me, loss was about diet. Keeping it off is about exercise and diet).

Quote:
and remind me that sometimes the journey is the prize
With that single observation alone, you WIN!
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Old 11-06-2013, 03:48 PM   #15
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You got it! We stop posting and lose the accountability so we gain it back. Its not the forum, its us.
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