Feel like I'm far too easy on myself
When I started my plan, I was very strict and would never go over my calorie limit. This lasted maybe three months. In the months since then, I've started to become very on/off. As in when it gets too much, and all I wanna do is eat cheesecake or just not care about my plan or counting calories, I give myself permission to do it... for a day, a week, a month. Basically, however long until I feel ready to commit again. I don't usually gain, except the last occasion, when I took a few weeks off, with one very bad junk food filled week thrown in. I've been back on plan for the last week, and any pounds that were creeping on have already all gone.
I feel like you're supposed to commit even when it gets really hard. But when I really don't want to do it any more, I just say to myself, well, don't then. And I feel completely ok about it. I feel ok about eating rubbish, and I feel ok that when I'm ready, I'll stop eating rubbish. I keep weighing every now and then to make sure I'm not gaining. I don't know. I feel like this isn't enough commitment, but for me, it seems more sustainable. When I don't do this, and I try to keep going and going even when I'm finding it impossible, I just end up thinking about food constantly, and craving it constantly, and finding it harder and harder to control until I give up anyway, feeling a lot worse.
At the same time, I feel like I could be doing a lot more, and all I'm really doing is giving up when it gets hard? Except I never even consider it giving up or starting over because it's always at the back of my mind that it's just a temporary indulgence. lol I'm just not sure this is the right attitude to have?