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Someone please remind me that this is all ok

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Old 07-25-2013, 03:36 PM   #1
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Unhappy Someone please remind me that this is all ok

I'm pregnant, and I've already made several posts about needing to brace myself for the inevitable weight gain. It's frustrating after concentrating so hard and so long on nothing but healthy weight loss, but I can reason through all the positives and deal. I'm currently 19 weeks and have been watching my weight gradually go back up the scale every Wednesday night.

This past week, I realize that I was a little more relaxed with my eating. We ate out more than usual but I was still careful with my portion sizes. I've also been extra hungry, so I've had a few extra portions at home of my usual healthy go-to foods. And I ended up fixing and eating a big lunch extra late yesterday (3:00-ish instead of noon), knowing I was going to weigh in just a few hours later around 5:30.

I was expecting a couple of pounds tops, but went up 5.75 for the week! Now granted, I'd been staying the same for the past three weeks, but I wasn't expecting such a huge jump! I hadn't gained any more than just 2 pounds in one week since 03/12! It was enough to tip me back over 220 pounds, the huge personal landmark I used to believe was impossible to get under and was so proud to have finally achieved before I found out about the new blessing.

I have gone over my numbers with my prenatal caretakers and am still in a healthy weight range for my gain. I know everything's going great and I have no reason to be upset. But my heart sank when I watched the scale tip over 220 last night, even though I had a late lunch, even though I know I've had a relaxed week, even though I'm allowing myself to eat more because duh, I'm pregnant with a baby growing inside me! I guess I'm just afraid of spiraling out of control. Wanting to get under 220 has literally been a lifetime struggle and I'm afraid it's slipping away from me again, regardless of the reasons behind it. I know I'll likely get back on track once I have the baby and am done with breastfeeding; after the roll I've been on in the past year I'm just too stubborn to not get back on track! But since this is also my first baby I'm nervous as I don't quite know what to expect with everything.

And don't get me wrong, I'm so happy about the baby! And I know everything I'm going through will be worth it in the end. I also know that everything is going to be ok; it's lovely starting a family, I'm still concentrating on my health first and foremost (as well as the baby's!), appearance isn't everything, and it's ok that I'll have to wait on fitting back into my newly acquired size 16 jeans after a lifetime of 22/24's and beyond . . . but in the meantime, can someone please remind me? I do realize how lucky I am, especially after the heartbreak of last year's miscarriage and all the progress I've worked so hard to make since then . . . maybe I need someone to knock some sense into me? Or maybe I just need some hugs!
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Old 07-25-2013, 03:45 PM   #2
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Hugs

Remember the weight you gain with pregnancy is not just fat stores. Blood volume increases, amniotic fluid, etc. you should gain about 25 lbs total.
Everything will come off after baby, just keep reminding yourself that this is temporary weight gain.

Hugs
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Old 07-25-2013, 03:54 PM   #3
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Thanks Mozzy! I honesty feel a bit silly for letting this get to me. Maybe part of it is my hormones going haywire?
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Old 07-25-2013, 04:07 PM   #4
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Your body is working so hard right now, making this new little person.

But I do understand--you have a mental line and you were so glad to get under it, and now you're struggling with knowing you're back over it--even though it's for the best reason in the world. You're not crazy or silly--it makes sense to me, at any rate (of course, I am both crazy and silly, so that might not be reassuring)
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Old 07-25-2013, 04:24 PM   #5
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I second Mozzy in that pregnancy weight gain is not all fat, but (mostly actually) fluids of various types, not t mention the actual weight of the baby.
And you will be surprised how fast it can come off after delivery, especially if you are breast feeding.
Just try to keep eating healthy foods and doing some appropriate exercise, and do your best to ride the hormonal waves, lol.
On the practical side, maybe if the small gains are really bothering you, as your doc not to tell you the number, just whether you are on track or not?
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Old 07-25-2013, 04:24 PM   #6
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Thanks, Beth. I have been charting my progress for ages and was watching my trend quite closely; I realized back in March that if I managed to stay consistent with it as I had in the previous year, I would be under 200 by mid-July . . . meaning right now! I think I have that lurking in the back of my mind as well, and instead I find myself over 220 again. I know it's temporary but can't I just have my cake and eat it too?

A big part of me is excited about being healthy throughout all of this, and seeing where I'm at once the baby is born. It's a long way to December though . . .
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Old 07-25-2013, 04:30 PM   #7
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Elladorine,

HUGS!!! I can imagine how this is tough for you. Not that it's the same, but I sometimes fear too much strength training because I know I'd gain! Having a baby is so much better then strength training hahaha

Don't forget, along with the baby weight gain, your metabolism will be running high if you choose to breastfeed. So hopefully that will assist in getting the baby weight off and you KNOW we will all be here to cheer you along.

You are doing something AMAZING- bringing new life into the world. A cherished life! Think big picture- it's worth it and don't sweat the gains <3
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Old 07-25-2013, 04:37 PM   #8
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**HUGS!!!!** Also don't forget that since you ate out more that some of that 5+ pounds is water weight from sodium in the restaurant foods! Your body knows what it needs to do and how to do it, you focus less on weight and more on proper nutrients, serving sizes, and exercise to keep you and baby as healthy as possible. I completely understand how certain numbers hold power but stressing over it is not going to help you or your little one.

Just keep coming here if you need a kick in the right direction!
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Old 07-25-2013, 04:45 PM   #9
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Fadedbluejeans: thanks!

I only do a monthly weigh-in with my doctors, but since I'm obese I was given a personalized guide on a healthy range to fall within for every week. I do the weekly Wednesday weigh-in with a weight loss group that I've been a member of since 2009 (it's non-for-profit and I'm currently the co-leader of my chapter). My gains don't currently "count" against me and won't as long as I stay in the healthy range dictated by my doctor. I feel it's important for me to continue the meetings and stay in control so I don't go crazy with the gaining, as well as be there for my fellow members as the co-leader. I suppose I could weigh backwards and not even look at the scale and numbers, but I feel more control in knowing what's going on. I can stomach the small gradual gains alright, I think what got to me was gaining nearly 6 pounds in one week, and thinking about how it took me a month and a half to take the same set of pounds off! Now granted, I do know that this is just a temporary gain and will likely leave when the baby's born, but it's hard for me to see right now especially since I've never been through this before.

What I really need to do is not focus on the number so much. I make sure I eat right, I do non-impact exercises, both of which should be my main focus. I had a photo taken yesterday and was actually shocked by how thin my face, neck, and shoulders looked . . . the rest of me is a different story though. To be fair, I'm an apple, and was so looking forward to whittling down my belly so I wouldn't look pregnant anymore . . . but now that I am pregnant I have every excuse in the world to look so.

I'm probably just overthinking things. I appreciate your post!
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★ Goal for 2015: Get under 200 pounds once and for all!!! ★
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Old 07-25-2013, 05:01 PM   #10
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Underwater: Thanks! I'm trying so hard not to sweat the gains! I think it's mainly that damned number of 220 . . . I never wanted to go above that again and wasn't expecting it for at least a few more weeks, yet here I am with a good reason. I realize it's only a number but I only managed to get down to that range once in my early 20's, and once again in my late 20's. I still can't believe I finally broke under it at age 37, because for the first time in my life I actually have hope of no longer being obese! I wanted it so bad that I could taste it, and according to my trend I was bound to make it under 200 by the middle of July! And here I am at the end of July, back above 220 again. It feels like it's always something.

Thank you for the pep talk! I'm trying so hard to see the big picture. I plan on breastfeeding as long as my body cooperates, so we'll see what happens.
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★ Goal for 2015: Get under 200 pounds once and for all!!! ★
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Old 07-25-2013, 05:12 PM   #11
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pnkrckpixikat: Thanks for the kick! I've been trying to remind myself that restaurant foods do typically give me water weight gain because of the sodium, plus that heavy, late lunch didn't do much to help either. I'm hoping for just a slight loss next week to help balance things out (even if it's just a quarter of a pound!), but you're right in that stressing over does nothing to help.

My mom's no longer with us for me to ask questions about her experiences, but I do know she gained a lot (100+) with each of her pregnancies, and that she had preeclampsia with me. While I don't want to stress over the numbers it's all the more reason for me to do my very best with being health conscious; I've already fought to lose 150 pounds and am scared of helplessly gaining it back in the way many do with pregnancies. But when I think about it logically, I do think I have things under reasonable control. My gain has been healthy so far, and there's no reason for things to spiral out of control as long as I stay mindful and stick with a healthy all-around plan.

Thanks again for the kick, I may be back for more later.
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★ Goal for 2013: Healthy Pregnancy, Healthy Baby REACHED 12-11-13
★ Goal for 2015: Get under 200 pounds once and for all!!! ★
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Old 07-25-2013, 05:17 PM   #12
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Do not worry. I had baby no 2 nine months ago and am 6lbs below what I weighed prior to conceiving her. And I did not breastfeed. It will be OK. Just another pause in the journey, that is all.

Are you going to find out the sex?
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Old 07-25-2013, 05:24 PM   #13
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Mini-Goals: 10%/24lb~pedicure (met 10/16/13) - halfway/35lb~new clothes - onederland/41lb~massage - goal/170~new dress (and maybe diamonds hehe)

= For every 5lb lost (hopefully to re-add more!)


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Old 07-25-2013, 05:32 PM   #14
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fattymcfatty: Thanks, I'll have to keep reminding myself it's just another pause. So good to hear it from someone that's recently been there.

And we just found out last week that we're having a boy! Oh, and that he's one week larger in size than my dates indicate, so I might be in for a big baby! I myself was born over ten pounds.

PreciousMissy:
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★ Goal for 2015: Get under 200 pounds once and for all!!! ★

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Old 07-25-2013, 05:49 PM   #15
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Congrats!
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