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Why did your weight gain happen?

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Old 03-28-2013, 11:23 AM   #1
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Default Why did your weight gain happen?

I'm in a really ugly place emotionally right now.

If there was anytime to emotionally eat...I feel like it would be now. But I have no urges to do so. So it makes me wonder...if I wasn't emotionally eating- How did I get here? How did I gain and maintain 100 pounds extra on my frame? I'm still putting a lot of thought into it, because I'm afraid if I don't figure it out- that the weight will creep back on.

Am I the only one who is a bit unsure on how this whole weight gain thing happened?

Do you know why you gained your weight (and then maintained it)? And what steps are you taking to combat it?
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Old 03-28-2013, 11:43 AM   #2
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As a kid, I ate out of boredom & because I just liked food. I was really active so I didn't gain a lot, though I did start gaining in middle school. In high school, I had a horrible diet, I had quit sports, and I had undiagnosed, untreated depression. Food was how I made myself feel better. I never realized until my senior year just how much bigger than everyone else I was. Through college & grad school, I went through bouts of depression, always had too little activity & a horrible diet.

Basically, I know how I gained and, ultimately, hit 300+. What I don't know is why I let myself get there/stay there. It makes no sense to me. I knew what I was doing to myself & I just kept doing it. Honestly, I don't even know how I got to the mental place I am at now, where I genuinely just want to do/will do whatever it takes to be healthier, but I thank God I am here. I can't live another year of my young life being morbidly obese. I won't.

Back to you, song bird, I think that being more self-aware in itself could be enough to help you keep it from creeping back. If only because you'll be on the look out & actively trying to keep it from happening.
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Old 03-28-2013, 12:14 PM   #3
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If you only gain a a pound a week, that's fifty two pounds in a year. But most people won't notice four pounds in a month. It really does creep up, and denial is a wonderful thing. I really had zero concept of how large I had gotten. It's part of the reason I'm so discouraged now - I have trouble seeing my progress because I never saw myself as big as I was.

All it takes is 500 extra calories a day not used. And factors like stress, etc it all adds up.
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Old 03-28-2013, 12:18 PM   #4
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Quote:
If you only gain a a pound a week, that's fifty two pounds in a year. But most people won't notice four pounds in a month. It really does creep up, and denial is a wonderful thing. I really had zero concept of how large I had gotten.
x2

I thought I was eating normally. It's only now when I look back that I can see I was eating way too much and of the wrong stuff.
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Old 03-28-2013, 12:31 PM   #5
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I ate and drank when I was happy, when I was sad, all the flipping time (nights and weekends I mean, never at work)! Food was a 24 hour stress reliever (so I thought).

My husband and I worked a lot of hours and looked forward to our time at the end of the day to relax and stuff our face. He never gained weight the way I did, it's like I gained enough for the 2 of us.

We had the best times together and he was the first guy in my life that I ever ate in front of. We've been together 18 years so that sounds silly to say but in the first year with him, I put on almost 15lbs. Talk about being comfortable in front of a guy!

Our life will never ever revolve around food and drink again. We finally came to a point in our life and now, we go for coffees instead of beers or make tea at home instead of vodka tonics. I do miss the drinks even once in a while now (he still has them but hardly as much, it's no fun to drink alone!) but they aren't on my plan and alcohol is the last thing I need right now.

I never knew I was large until it was too late and I was too large. Once I get to onederland, I will never ever ever ever ever go back to 2xx or 3xx weights. I can't mentally handle it.
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Old 03-28-2013, 12:48 PM   #6
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I started to gain weight at 8 years old and it was because of undiagnosed/untreated hypoglycemia. I basically learned that if I felt a certain way, it meant I needed food. But I also learned that enough food could keep me from ever feeling that way.

Also, I recently realized that something odd happened to my entire family during the years I was a teenager - we all got fat. (All except one athletic brother and one always-skinny-no-matter-what sister.) I haven't been able to puzzle out what that was about it, but it's weird.

Then in my 20s and 30s (which were truly horrific life years) I discovered food as a drug. I had major issues with overeating and binging because certain foods in certain quantities gave me a numbness that I desperately needed. It took a lot of therapy and self-analysis to overcome that.

And why did I stay fat for all those years? Partly because I was totally in denial that I was fat. And even when the reality smacked me in the face, hopelessness and depression kept me from dealing with the problem. My thought process was, "If I get thin and healthy I'll probably live for another 20, or 30, or 40 years. No thank you! I'd rather be fat and die next year." So a lot of this diet journey for me is finding the reasons why I don't want to be dead in a year from weight related complications. And, honestly, some days that's really difficult. And other days it's as simple as seeing a picture of my twin great nieces and knowing I want to be a part of their lives as they grow up.
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Old 03-28-2013, 01:03 PM   #7
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I started gaining weight when I hit puberty due to PCOS. It was about 10lbs per year like clockwork. Then I found a good balance around 180lbs with the BC pill (still really overweight though.. but not that bad to me). I counted every calorie, ate organic, cut out grains, and killed it at Crossfit.

THEN I WENT OFF THE PILL.

Here I am now.... 218lbs!!!! I DID NOT eat those calories. I DID NOT earn those pounds sitting on my bum. I feel like if I was to just gain almost 40lbs I might as well have enjoyed the experience with cheat meals!!! I mean gosh. 40lbs from eating greens and organic protein and letting myself be hungry at night? So not fair. I'm currently taking herbs to try to level myself out.
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Old 03-28-2013, 01:08 PM   #8
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I gained a lot of weight when I was a kid. I loved junk food. Junk food, junk food, junk food, junk food. If it was there......I was going to eat it. Didn't matter if I ate a whole big bag of Doritos. I was going to eat it. I ate because I just wanted to eat. That was my problem then, and it's still a problem. But I've gotten control over that in the past several months and I'm very proud of myself.
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Old 03-28-2013, 01:14 PM   #9
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I dont know when or how it started - I just remember my dad would bring me a chocolate home every single night when he cam home from work, we werent allowed sweets any other time, and so I would eat the chocolate - whether I liked it or not, whether I was hungry or not....... ta dah! bad habits began - I still crave chocolate when I see my dad.
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Old 03-28-2013, 01:21 PM   #10
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I got down to 170 when I met my boyfriend 3 years ago, I've always yo-yo'd. To be completely and bluntly honest, I got lazy and stopped watching what, and how much, I was eating.
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Old 03-28-2013, 01:22 PM   #11
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love this thread. I was always chubby as a kid, but I never realized how fine i was until I put on my weight! i was so critical!

Through most of university, I was 155 and then i got to around 175. I started training for a marathon and got to 152 but then I injured my ankle and also moved to the Northwest Territories in Canada. Add decreased mobility, depression from not being able to run anymore, and a very crappy store in our tiny town (that is fly in only) that lacks fresh fruits, veggies and meat, and BAM! 60 lbs in a year. OH, and the only place to workout is my kitchen! No gyms here, and it's -40 Celsius for 9 months of the year!

Lots of reasons to quit, but even more reasons to keep going!
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Old 03-28-2013, 01:25 PM   #12
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I am a really picky eater, so when I find a food I like, I tend to eat mass quantities of it.
I got fat by not understanding portion control. There was no concept of serving sizes or limiting calories when I was growing up. Second and third helpings were very common place. I come from a family of overweight, sedentary people. So me being overweight and sedentary was "normal".
As an adult, I am slowly learning moderation.
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Old 03-28-2013, 01:45 PM   #13
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Yep...

I'm a chronic overeater. Just eat too much and too often. Big portions. Out of boredom, out of stress, out of depression. I grew up in substance abusing household...my dad was an alcoholic AND an overeater and my mom was a binge eater with ZERO concept of nutrition. She'd regularly serve us really bad food and but worse I regularly saw her eat whole packs of cookies and sometimes whole cartons (the big 'uns) of Breyer's Butter Pecan ice cream. I never saw normal eating growing up. My dad was always obese. My mom wasn't terribly overweight when I was younger because she's one of those people who is always active and she was a regular runner. But when she quit running her weight ballooned....and she made every excuse in the book for why...but it wasn't HER fault. I used to binge a lot when I was in college, but gradually stopped. I don't think it's my natural way. I did eat a lot of calories over a period of a day often, but not classic binging.

When I got pregnant I REALLY packed on the pounds...and went from a US size 16 (so not tiny to begin with) to maybe a US size 22/24. My husband became verbally and emotionally abusive during my pregnancy and worsened when my son was born. I ate to comfort myself. I was unwell also and so didn't exercise much - it was hard for me to make time for myself. Food was my pleasure. I was very depressed...and still struggle with that.

Like Rachel, I know how and I even kinda know why, but I don't know why I allowed myself to do that me. I clearly have some self-destructive tendencies (and not just about weight). I dunno. I should love myself more.
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Old 03-28-2013, 01:51 PM   #14
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I can run the gamut: Health issues, genetics, not enough activity, just really like food, simply eat too much of it.

As a child, I had health problems that left me bedridden for years. Then some really crazy hormonal stuff kicked in around puberty, maybe related to a tumor on the 'master' hormonal gland (pituitary). Man, you should the stretch marks - ALL over my body! Years of doctor-mandated food restriction (searching for allergies, etc) distorted my relationship with food (food sneaking, etc). And apart from my own health, there's at least a predisposition to heaviness, looking at my extended family -- or at least a predisposition to the habits that lead to heavy...

I came to own my food choices in my late teens and have come a long way in constructing a really healthy diet. But that still doesn't guarantee a healthy weight. The cold hard realities of calorie excess - no matter where the calories come from - took awhile to sink in for me. You can be eating an incredibly healthy diet and still be eating too much of it (... especially when your activity level is restricted). And when my health issues get particularly bad, I gravitate towards tasty comfort and ease (aka too much takeout).

I've spent a lot of time reflecting on how all this came to be - or more significantly, why I regained from my other 'big' weight loss in 2007. I've got a list of my personal weight truths. It's a good tool to have to know the triggers and the weak spots in the rhythms of my life.
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Old 03-28-2013, 01:51 PM   #15
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Pregnancy. Pregnancy. Pregnancy. Divorce. Pregnancy.

I would eat whatever I wanted and however much I wanted when pregnant and immediately begin taking it off after I had the baby. Did this 3 times and then, I kicked out my POS first husband and didn't lose the weight after the third pregnancy. I met the love of my life who is dead set against dieting from watching his best friends wife go on some real insane fad diets. We had our first, my fourth, child and I topped out at 350 pounds!!! Holy cow!

I have never, ever *felt* fat. I don't realize how big I am. In my mind's eye, am still this vision of health from my teens/early twenties.

For health reasons it is imperative that I lose every bit of this excess weight in a timely manner, so here I am.

Actually, had my husband not been standing beside me at the cardiologist when he said my heart is just not meant to pump blood through this size of body, he may still be against dieting. It has to be done & I am not doing anything nuts so I have his full support now.
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