It would be nice if all teenagers focused on fitness versus thigh gaps.
This x 100!! Where on earth did this thigh gap obsession even come from? I'm from a small town, so I may have just been out of the loop for a while, but it seems like it has exploded out of nowhere. So many people I know (I'm not talking just teenagers either) are now determining their health based on their thigh gap.
I just don't understand.... I don't think I will ever have much of a thigh gap unless I get REALLY REALLY skinny.
As for the original question... If teens are obese, and open to it, I think they should be taught healthy lifestyle choices (and encouraged to lose weight) by parents, doctors, nurses whichever they are most comfortable with. I don't necessarily agree they should be put on or forced on a strict "diet" though.
I also stay away from teenage posts on here and mfp. Mfp seems to be the worst though! Some of those posts are so extreme.
I'm with Vex. If they are obese, I think dieting should be looked into. If they're simply a little bit on the chubby side, then guidance toward a more healthful way of eating and higher levels of activity would be fine. I grew up fat and really wish I had learned better eating habits early on. My parents would always say I should watch what I eat, but they never enforced it or modeled it themselves.
This. I was a heavy kid and whenever I brought it up with my parents because I felt insecure about it, they'd just tell me to eat better. How could I have known what 'better' meant when I went to look in the kitchen and it was filled with chips, soda, snack cakes, etc? I think as far as young kids go, it's on the parents to help them be healthy. At that age I had no idea what the junk food was doing to me, I just ate it because it was what we were given and why would my parents want to make me ill? (Because that's what obesity is when it boils down to it, an illness.) Hopefully by the time they're teenagers, they know how to live healthfully and don't need to lose a ton of weight in the first place, much less resort to eating disorders to do so.
Thanks to you, I just had an epiphany! I sit there and tell my 15 yr old daughter exactly what your parents said to you. "Just eat better". You are 100% right! What does that mean?
I am going at this all wrong with her. I think I may introduce her to My Fitness Plan and let her explore and maybe log her meals for a week so she can see first hand what she's consuming and how it effects her.
This. I was a heavy kid and whenever I brought it up with my parents because I felt insecure about it, they'd just tell me to eat better. How could I have known what 'better' meant when I went to look in the kitchen and it was filled with chips, soda, snack cakes, etc? I think as far as young kids go, it's on the parents to help them be healthy. At that age I had no idea what the junk food was doing to me, I just ate it because it was what we were given and why would my parents want to make me ill? (Because that's what obesity is when it boils down to it, an illness.) Hopefully by the time they're teenagers, they know how to live healthfully and don't need to lose a ton of weight in the first place, much less resort to eating disorders to do so.
And this, lol.
I was about to post the same exact thing. My parents were very social when I was growing up, so through their level of activity, they were able to stay thin. They didn't discuss good eating habits to help me learn. My mother is now disabled so she's not as active. Now that I now more about food I can see that she has terrible eating habits, and has gained weight as a result.
So, here's my thoughts. As a parent, it's my responsibility to teach my children hygenic habits, like pottying, washing their hands frequently, not touching things in bathrooms without a towel between you, ie the door handle of a public bathroom is THE single nastiest, germ filled thing on the planet. It's my responsibility to teach them societal expectations of how one comports themselves among their contemporaries, their elders, their church (sprititual life), I'm responsible for making sure they understand the importance of good grades and doing their absolute best in things they take on, such as soccer or dance, I'm responsible for making sure they know the value of a dollar, how to save and spend in a responsible manner, that they eventually learn how credit and debits work in regards to their present and future finances, basically, as a parent, it's my job to make sure that my kids turn out to be adults who are compassionate towards others, capable of holding a job that both fulfills them and provides for their needs, that they're people other people want to be friends with and that they're capable of telling true friends from falsies. It's my duty to encourage them to not just finish high school, but to get a college or technical degree that is capable of supporting them. To teach them how to not just choose a mate, but how to respect and love their partner in a way that fulfills them, their partner and any resulting spawn. With all of that, why would I, as their parent, NOT teach them healthy, sustainable eating habits that will allow them to maintain an active lifestyle that keeps them healthy and happy? It's my job and my obligation to give my kids every possible tool at their disposal to make their life a success. Like it or not, statistically the overweight/obese population makes less than their thinner counterparts, they're statistically more likely to stay in a personal relationship that makes them unhappy, statistically they're more likely to be diagnosed with diabetes, heart disease, chronic joint/bone/muscle/ligament issues that tend to present with chronic pain and a lower quality of life, obese and overweight adults often have undiagnosed sleep disorders including sleep apnea which reduces the quality of one's sleep and can lead to death. Why in the world would I willingly give that future to my children? That's insane to me.
My mom is a CNRA, basically, when you require drugs for surgery she's the person riding the chair and making sure you come through it. I'm horrified of her stories when she's been on call in ER's where 200 pound 2 year olds DIE on the table because she can not get them under because when you lay thm flat the fat forces the trachea closed because the underlying musculature is that of a child, with the fat of a full grown male. That terrifies me. In that particular case, the state stepped in, charged the parents with medical neglect and child neglect. The childs Dr had referred the parents and child to dieticians, nutritionists and WIC had stepped in and done the same thing. The obese parents, took the dietary guidelines and basically used them as coasters to set their milk shakes on. I'm sorry, that's clearly medical child abuse. This, of course is an EXTREME case, and I'm aware of that. However, yes, I do think, when I see a very obese set of parents, with a teenage son and daughter who are in their early teens and already so overweight they have that waddling, arms can't brush against their sides walk, and I see them filling their cart, which also contains an overweight preschooler, that yes, absolutely those kids should be put on a diet, but more importantly, in our school systems we are failing our children. We serve them pizza and chocolate milk because the USDA will reimburse those expenses as long as it comes in meeting certain caloric guidelines. 650 calories for lunch?!?! WHAT?!?! We should be absolutely appalled at the lack of nutrition in our schools as well as outraged and furious at the lack of nutrition basics being taught in our schools. For those with kids in school, are they being required to take a nutrition course? Do they have PE? We lament the fattening of our kids, yet we as a society do nothing to stop it.
Yes, many of us here are eating more healthily and encouraging our kids to follow our leads, but are we being honest with them as to why we're doing it? I am. From their earliest ages, I've been eliminating junk from our lives, I've always restricted their intake on fast food, fried foods, soda's and chips, etc. Sure, they have those, just not as a staple, probably not even once a month. They also know the reality of diabetes and heart disease. My dad had a heart attack at age 34. That's terrifying to me. I'm very honest with them, about this health stuff. They know that eating to much of certain foods in frequent stages will reduce your quality of life as well as the length of your life. They know that beyond the health issues, it reduces things like the number of teeth in your face. The appearance of your skin as you enter your teen years, the appearance of your hair and nails. Sure, some of it's vanity, but as pre-adolescents, that's what the appeal is. As is the honesty in telling them that "Hey, those brussel sprouts put up a huge battle in the garden and now they're poor, headless, bushes, let's be sprout eaters and take all their energy so we can go to the batting cages".
That got way longer than intended, but yeah, I think as parents, we absolutely have a responsibility to our kids futures and what kind they have and that includes their health and nutrition. My kids are outside right now rollerskating, they're 'just being kids', but they just had a snack of a clementine cutie and a bottle of water, instead of a snickers and a coke. I don't see how teaching them that healthy food is the norm and unhealthier choices are a rarity is keeping them from being kids who are enjoying their spring break just as much as the neighbors who are eating that snickers and coke.
I grew up fat and really wish I had learned better eating habits early on. My parents would always say I should watch what I eat, but they never enforced it or modeled it themselves.
Quote:
Originally Posted by thinkfit
I was a heavy kid and whenever I brought it up with my parents because I felt insecure about it, they'd just tell me to eat better. How could I have known what 'better' meant when I went to look in the kitchen and it was filled with chips, soda, snack cakes, etc? I think as far as young kids go, it's on the parents to help them be healthy. At that age I had no idea what the junk food was doing to me, I just ate it because it was what we were given and why would my parents want to make me ill? (Because that's what obesity is when it boils down to it, an illness.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Angihas2
. . . I think as parents, we absolutely have a resopnsibility to our kids futures and what kind they have and that includes their health and nutrition. My kids are outside right now rollerskating, they're 'just being kids', but they just had a snack of a clementine cutie and a bottle of water, instead of a snickers and a coke. I don't see how teaching them that healthy food is the norm and unhealthier choices are a rarity is keeping them from being kids who are enjoying their spring break just as much as the neighbors who are eating that snickers and coke.
I agree with the above.
I don't think that kids should go on diets BY THEMSELVES! I think that's where some of the problems happen. They got overweight/obese in large part due to environmental factors, perhaps being completely uneducated about proper nutrition and/or being active, and probably many other things factored in as well. How in the world are they supposed to HEALTHFULLY lose weight going from all of that?!
BUT do I think that overweight/obese minors should try to lose weight? Definitely! With the aid and support of their pediatrician and families!
I know from personal experience that being overweight hinders the ability to fully enjoy being a kid!
Honestly, the weight is easier to lose the younger you are, generally speaking. If one is obese as a teenager, there is no reason they should not diet. I wish I had paid closer attention and not allowed myself to get fat in the first place. Since I DID get fat, I'm sorry I didn't do something about it in my 20s or early 30s.
In general, I do not think children should "diet." But I think treating obesity in children should be a part of the medically supervised health care adults have a responsibility to provide for children in their care, just as they should receive treatment for an eating disorder, for celiac, diabetes & anything else.
I agree that no one on a message board is qualified to help teens or children with weight issues & steering clear is a really good idea, in my opinion.
I'm gonna get slammed.... but I don't believe that ANYONE should diet. And I've come to this thru a lifetime of dieting and a bad relationship to food. I believe dieting makes you fat. But you're all adults...so make your choices. I am using intuitive eating and by and large eating healthier and moving more with the aim of fitness. My only restrictions are: avoiding drinking calories (juice in particular) and not buying crisps/chips.
I especially believe that children should not diet.
That being said...when you see fat kids - then there's something very wrong with the existing way that they are eating (perhaps in rare cases a serious metabolic disorder) - and there's something wrong with their activity levels. That way of living needs to be changed up - no doubt about it. Lifestyle changes - yes!!! Dieting. No. And I know it's hard, because these kinda kids don't have appropriate on-off switches for their hunger - it's been overfed into oblivion. And as for sport...I'm sure that's pretty miserable for them.
My son is only 5 and there's a kid in his class who is obese. He's substantially less obese than he was when he started school almost two years ago now (my son's school really emphasises sport and moving around) - but he's still obese. Sooo many times I've had to reprimand my son or one of his school chums for saying horrible things about this kid. My son routinely calls him Fat Jack* to differentiate him from one of his friends with the same name. School must be excruciating for him - already - at age 6. Who's responsible for this? Jack's parents - who by the way are pretty normal in weight - mom is very small and dad is thick-set but not fat. (*not his real name)
As to teens. And especially teen girls. I just want to weep. When I was a teen I was not grossly overweight, but I was unfit and less active than I should have been. But something else -I was large framed and during those years I was growing into this large frame I have now and would not trade. I'm sturdy and strong! I could have eaten better and moved more (and should have). But nothing was gonna make me one of those really small girls I so admired. I just don't have the bone structure for it. I thank goodness I didn't have access to the Internet back in the day - with this thigh gap nonsense and so on. But this is a larger problem than just one teen girl dieting.
On this forum, when I encounter these very young girls who want to lose stupid amounts of weight - if I give advice - it's advice to love themselves - which I know they won't take. The self-loathing is palpable. I don't think they should be on this forum. But frankly, I'd rather have them here than on some of those disgusting pro-eating disorder sites.
From personal experience, I think kids who are overweight and obese should diet and watch what they eat. That being said.....
I think one of the biggest flaws in the world today is societies perceptions on what is considered beautiful and skinny. It is horribly flawed and skewed. I think it's just as beneficial to teach children that the model on the cover of the magazine they read has been photoshopped to pefection. Those images are not normal and never will be. Trying to obtain that level of perfection leads to dangerous roads and even worse health than being overweight to begin with, both mental and physical. The media floods our youth with the message that being hot and fit equals happiness, and I know many hot and fit people who are not happy. It does not instantly give you the perfect mate, the perfect job, and the perfect everything.
I say this because as I teen I was overweight, not obese as now, but heavily overweight. I was picked on, I had few friends, I was horribly depressed, and because of all the above I hated high school with a fiery burning passion. I would look at the bombardment of media on the net, the newstand, the tv and feel 100 times worse about my situation because I would never ever look like any of those women. I did everything to lose weight I could think off. I went on a lettuce only diet, I starved myself, I took pills, I'd exercise till I threw up...... Then I just wanted that instant quick fix that would make me perfect. I didn't have anyone tell me that those things weren't healthy at all and that the perfection I wanted didn't exist. There is no instant quick fix. I even had a nutritionist tell me that my lettuce only diet was a "good" thing.
I wish I knew then what I know now and I wish someone had took the time and effort to "help" me with my weight then, when I was younger and it was easier to get healthy. I wish I hadn't been such an idiot and realized how the media manipulates society. I had a great family, but they were just as clueless on healthy eating as I was. Thankfully, all my crash attempts at losing my weight didn't lead to long lasting health problems.
So yes, kids should diet if they are unhealthy. I think they should learn good eating and fitness habits early while their brains are able to soak it in LOL. Why not? Why is that any different than learning other skills they'll need later in life like reading and writing? I wish I had. I wish I had the internet as it is now back then with its wealth of information on how to lose weight in a healthy manner.
But I also think teaching kids to love themselves as they are is just as important. I wouldn't have tried so many bad ways to lose weight if my self esteem hadn't been beaten down by bullies and societies flawed perceptions of beauty. That pininterst link horrifies me honestly..... We should focus on health, not thigh gaps!!!!
I don't think that kids should go on diets BY THEMSELVES! I think that's where some of the problems happen. They got overweight/obese in large part due to environmental factors, perhaps being completely uneducated about proper nutrition and/or being active, and probably many other things factored in as well. How in the world are they supposed to HEALTHFULLY lose weight going from all of that?!
BUT do I think that overweight/obese minors should try to lose weight? Definitely! With the aid and support of their pediatrician and families!
Yes, this. I lost over 100 pounds as a teenager but obviously didn't have the skills/knowledge/possibly maturity to keep it off. I think if I had discovered the fat positive community and health at every size as a teenager, I would have done a LOT better for myself - I was really hung up on the idea that thin = healthy at the time, and that the most important thing I could do for my health was to get the weight of at any cost. I seriously believed that it was healthier for me to puke my guts out after most meals than to focus on eating healthy and moving and risk staying fat.
I'm gonna get slammed.... but I don't believe that ANYONE should diet. And I've come to this thru a lifetime of dieting and a bad relationship to food. I believe dieting makes you fat. But you're all adults...so make your choices. I am using intuitive eating and by and large eating healthier and moving more with the aim of fitness. My only restrictions are: avoiding drinking calories (juice in particular) and not buying crisps/chips.
I especially believe that children should not diet.
I agree, perhaps, the word "diet" is not the right word to use. I definitely don't believe a child should be put on WW or Jenny Craig or South Beach etc, for sure NOT, they need to be taught how to eat for the rest of their life, I definitely agree with that!!!
So, should children go on "a diet"? Probably not, that insinuates at some point they will go off the diet. Should they change their current diet if they are unhealthy? Yes!!! Lifelong changes to diet and improving activity level. Perhaps " long term dietary changes" would be a more approprate term to use.
I've been overweight most of my life. I'll never forget in middle school when I was 12 having to get weighed in gym class and being 205lbs. Do I wish my parents would have taken control of my diet and helped me get healthier? Yep. My dad was a state away (and frankly a $hitty one) and my mom worked 2 jobs to take care of my sister and me. She couldn't do a lot with us and she would buy us whatever we wanted to eat, I think she was half tired and half felt guilty for having to work so much.
That quote from pinterest is interesting to me. Yes, I do believe eating disorders, including what most of us suffer from, overeating and emotional eating, is a mental disorder, but I definitely don't think it's the kind that we are just born with. It becomes something we developed over time, our society, our way of life, the cheap unhealthy food we have available now has led to this raging epidemic of overweight America.
I hope there is a real movement to turn things around eventually. I don't want my child and her children cursed to continue on this downward spiral of being unhealthy.
I was heavy all my life. I was very active and I had a mother who was thin and always introduced me to healthy eating choices and I had a father who was obese and berated me constantly for being fat. I think that my mother did a great job and my heaviness (as a teenager) was much more psychological (a great way to make my father angry) than something that they could help me with.
I do wish that my mother had realized that I should be seeing a psychologist to deal with the issues surrounding my relationship with my father and how my weight was a symptom. But I didn't realize that until my late 20's so I am not sure how she could have. She assumed it was more parent modeling (and my father was obese).
I think it's a fine line. Overly involved and obsessive and you can easily turn a child that's a little heavy into someone who thinks bulimia is an option or that their worth is simply a dress size. Now that I have my own daughter, I think about this a lot. For me, I will try to be a good role model for self-love and I think that's the best quality I can bestow on my child.
