[Smiling_Sara]

From Sept 2010 to Sept 2011, I roughly gained 21 pounds. It seems I can't quit emotional eating. How do I know it's emotional? I'm not physically hungry, and I know I'm not, yet, something deep within wants to eat until I"m uncomfortable. I think it started when I got stuck at 185 for almost a year, despite eating well and working out, so I kind of said to myself, I'm sick of saying no to cake, cookies, and pizza, and just started eating them when I wanted. Problem is, is that I want them all the time. At this time, I also started to get unwanted attention. And I'm use to being a fly on the wall and having nobody pay attention to me in a sensual matter. It all kind of freaked me out, and to cope, I started eating.

I have continued to work out through this, but gaining 21 pounds WHILE working out almost daily is terrible and completely diet related.

I don't know how to get back on track. I want to, but it's hard when something else is telling to eat that bag of twizzlers.

Anyone else go through this? Anyone else overcome this? Just have ideas for me on how to get back on track? Things to do otherwise? Besides go to the gym, cause I'm already there daily for over an hour?

I hate that I got off track to begin with. I'd do anything just to be at 185 again.

[jitterfish]

Its easy to do, we've all done it I'm sure. The back slide, the feeling of diet fatigue. Its time to sit down and really think about what you want, revisualise and start planning. You're at the gym which is great so its just food that you need to get in control of again. Plan what you're going to eat and start again. You might just find that because you've been off plan the weight will jump off, you know what it was like when you first lost weight, big loss at first before you body settles down? That big jump might just be what you need to feel motivated.

For the emotional side can you identify what it is? I'm a boredom eater as well as emotional. The emotional I try to address by identifying the problem and trying to tackle it. Sometimes that works, sometimes chocolate is my best friend Have you got support other than us lot?

You lost 93lbs, you can do it again! You can do it and more! Believe in yourself.

[PreciousMissy]

Funny you posted this today. I just got an email from a friend saying that she can feel an emotional eating binge coming on. I haven't heard back from her yet...but here is my suggestion when you know it's emotional eating.

Talk/write it out. I do. To an outsider I may look unbalanced, but I do it at home where no one can see me, lol. I talk to myself and ask questions:

Why do you want to eat this?
Is there something healthier you can eat and you could have this tomorrow? (if the answer is "yes, but I don't want it" then I know it's emotional eating)
What emotion are you feeling right now?
What made you feel this way?
What can you do to prevent feeling this way in the future?

Usually by the time I get through all that I realize that I don't really want to eat the Twinkies.

I highly suggest either writing or speaking aloud, it makes it "real".

[peanutt]

There's a saying that a popular 12-step program has...."think through the drink". I've adopted that mantra when I'm facing an emotional urge to eat when not hungry.

I think about how the junk food that I crave will actually make me feel ill. I think about how I will regret the binge, or even feel guilty for the binge. Thinking about that regretful feeling almost always stops me in my tracks.

Using a positive spin, think of how far you have come. Think of how much better you feel now than you did 93 lbs ago. Think of how awesome and energized you feel after a healthy meal of something like chicken and fresh veggies. Think of healthy, on-plan snacks or treats that you can have and will make you feel good about yourself.

I have found reading Geneen Roth's books to be quite useful in helping me understand what would lead to the binges/emotional overeating.

Remember, this is an addiction just like any other. If, for example, cookies are a trigger food for you and you can't have just one, then you may need to keep away from the cookies altogether.

[fyreflie24]

There's a Beck forum here for the Beck Solution. Judy Beck is a cognitive therapist and the program deals directly with emotional eating. Really worked for me! PM me if you'd like more details Good luck! I've struggled with this for a loonnnggg time, it's not easy.

[Justwant2Bhealthy]

I see the emotions of "frustration" in your post -- stuck at 185 lbs despite so much effort; "anger" -- can't eat what I want to; "fear" of intimacy from unwanted attention; "battle fatigue" being at this so long; and a lot of "disappointment" as well ... yes, emotion; emotion; emotion ...

1) I also like the idea of journalling your feelings; you can make a file on your PC, and erase it down the road. Journalling can help you see patterns. Look for other ways to deal with them instead of EATING YOUR FEELINGS, or stuffing them down with food. Ask yourself what you are afraid of, and what you can do or say next time to handle things better. Practicing does help. Remember that fears are often unfounded /or exaggerated.

2) I also use DISTRACTION techniques -- made a list of things I can do to get away from the food. I made myself a special room at the other end of the house away from the kitchen, where my PC is where I can journal, play games, work on my hobbies, and/ read.

3) One of my biggest issues/patterns was upsets with family (esp my spouse). When DH & I have a disagreement that isn't going anywhere constructive or healthy, I now walk away and go to one of my special places. I made a conscious choice (another new good habit) not to argue over silly things anymore; when he engages, I walk ...

4) I also try to keep trigger foods out my house as much as possible -- having lots of trigger foods around is kinda self-sabotage.

5) So as to not feel deprived in any way, I have found lots of healthier substitutes for my favorite foods, ie Pita Pizzas instead of the high-calorie take-out ones; healthy burgers (ie chicken burgers or lean burgers), etc. I have developed some good new habits like having salad and or lots & lots of veggies with my meal to fill up on. Soup at lunchtime is really good too. Friday night is fun food night; we have our favorite foods; many in a more healthy form, but just as yum.

6) I also use "Positive Mantras" and "Positive Affirmations" which I recite out loud to myself to remind myself what a great person I am, and that I am doing well -- negating any negative thoughts that may have emerged. Since I have a strong faith, I also use positive scriptures, prayers, singing, playing organ or piano, or listening to music to distract myself, calm myself, and help myself heal. Peace & quiet; gentle music & reading helps me to de-stress.

7) One of my favorite Mantras is to simply say "CANCEL, CANCEL ... I WILL NOT EAT MY FEELINGS!" OR ... I WILL NOT RE-ACT -- TAKE CHARGE! For negative thoughts -- counter them with an appropriate and positive response. Have some ready; memorize them.

8) When I slip up, as we all do -- I just move on and continue on plan for the next snack or meal. A lot of planning and strategy is in play here; planning to have healthy snacks & having them in the house. For me, I had to learn to BE PREPARED ... I plan, plan, plan, and plan some more ... I even plan how I can stay on plan ...

9) How to get back on track -- one-day-at-a-time; one-meal-at-a-time; one-snack-at-a-time ... one-step-at-a-time. The first step is making up your mind to "get back on track" ... then start right now ...

10) Come here often -- read the success stories & advice of maintainers; it really helps to keep you on your good health journey.

[fyreflie24]

Just want: "I will not eat my feelings" omg that's brilliant!!

[Steph7409]

One of my eating triggers is anxiety. If I make a mistake at work or run into a problem I'm not sure how to solve, I reach for the chocolate. If I start obsessing about what a loser I am, I eat a whole pizza.

Then, while watching one of the hoarders shows (my guilty pleasure), something one of the therapists said really resonated with me: she told the hoarder to ride out her feeling of anxiety about throwing something away, because the anxiety would pass. I thought, that's right - it will. So now, I reach for a piece of gum at work when I'm stuck. At home, if I start thinking about spree-eating, I make myself ride it out until the feeling passes. It's been remarkably helpful.

[Smiling_Sara]

I want to thank everyone for replying. It means more than you know.

I am so thankful that I know the tools to lose weight. I know I have done it, and know what to do to do it again. Being so close to 100 total pounds lost and getting into the 170's ( something I haven't seen since middle school ) scared me so much. Along with the unwanted attention I was starting to get from men scared me as well. And since I am an emotional doormat who doesn't know how to say no, and is a total people pleaser, I wasn't sure how to handle these men. Having a terrible case of social anxiety doesn't help either. For as long as I can remember I was the "fat friend" with men. I don't know how to be anything else. And that is terrifying. It's terrible. In my 30's and "scared"

I try to keep myself busy. I take an excercise class 2 days a week, and work out on my own another 3-4 days a week. It is solely diet that is getting to me. I also had to move back to my parents home in the last couple years, and that has been very stressful for me. They also do not eat healthy, and keep the house packed with unhealthy foods. I try to have my own space for healthy food, but the stress of everything makes it difficult.

I want to try blogging, but again, I"m alsmost scared to, cause I don't want to have others find out about it, I'm terribly hard on myself, even though I am not on anyone else. I treat myself horribly in that regard. You can do better, no you can't, just eat the pain away. Ot I have family saying this won't hurt you, eating that won't hurt you, you go to the gym. I think to myself, "yeah, you're prob right, it won't, but what you don't know is I are a bag of twizzlers earlier while browsing the internet"

I must get a grip on this, I'm just scared, and feel isolated in my feelings, and feel like I can't go to anyone cause they won't understand.

[Riesz]

You can make it through this! You are so strong and losing 93 lbs is an amazing accomplishment!

About the blogging... I know many blog sites allow you to make either your entire blog private or make each individual post private so literally only you are able to read anything you type. I've used a private blog as a diary and find it immensely helpful to have a private space like that for venting. No one ever has to know about your diary blog!

[sassyangies]

Everyone has awesome advice. I'm glad I found this question. I have had allot of emotional eating problems and that's the one thing that scares me this time around. I'm only a little less than a month into starting again and it feels so different, but I'm still so scared that when something goes wrong in my life or life happens its going to trigger my emotional eating and it's all going to be ruined. (how I see it sometimes) I am a all or nothing person and I so need to work on that.
What I have been doing to overcome my overeating (sometimes I think it's emotional eating) Is to do what Missy said mentally or out loud if your at home is ask the questions and see what comes of that. And for me if I really think I AM hungry at a time where I think I shouldn't be then I eat veggies or fruits and that's all for that snack. That way even if you aren't that hungry you can have something good for you. I am doing this while I'm working through my eating habits and head issues. It seems to be working, but like I said I'm only a month in not even that so I hope you find what works for you. Your definetely on your way though.. Great JOb!

[kyalpn]

I will not eat my feelings...

Love it! So many feelings are wrapped up in us when we try to lose weight. I'm just now trying to figure all of mine out and figure out the triggers.

And "Think through the drink".

Absolutely. I always forget to stop and think about how I know I'm going to feel if I eat that pastry in a negative response to something as opposed to making a better choice to enjoy one mouthful simply because it looks divine and walk away.

Such great advise here.

[aka8941]

I went to counseling. Not special therapy, or to an expensive clinician, just regular subsidized counseling at a local university with doctoral students. They are very good btw.

That might help you figure out what's bugging you...