I think you're looking for something that doesn't exist. I don't know of any such weight loss site that is so specific that it excludes the viewpoints you've mentioned having a problem with. We're all here from different places, and for different reasons (and that's just as true on all the other sites).
Weight loss is a mixed bag for all of us, and you're never going to find a site that includes only views and values you're comfortable with. Weight loss is too personal a journey for that. But you don't have to agree with everyone to benefit from a diverse community - and the diversity brings a lot more benefits than disadvantages. You can always ignore or argue with what you don't agree with, but you can't entirely avoid it, no matter where you go.
There are a lot of sub-communities here at 3FC - and when you get more familiar with them, you can stick to those you find the most comfortable. But I'm afraid that's the best you can do, no matter where you go - because there are no websites to the best of my knowledge that fit your ideal. In fact, 3FC is about the kindest, gentlest, most tolerant, most reasonable weight loss site I've found.
On the other sites, I've experienced far worse in the way of wacky advice, insults, name-calling, hate-speach, and even evil-stalker behavior.
I'm afraid if you find the 3FC atmosphere disturbingly judgemental, you're going to be horrified by what is out there on the other sites. I don't know any that eliminate people based on their degree of overweightness. Besides, where do you draw the line. Some people will be uncomfortable with anyone who doesn't have at least 50 lbs to lose, whereas someone else would be uncomfortable with anyone who didn't have at least 100 lbs to lose, and someone else would want to exclude those who've never been 200 lbs overweight, or who've never been bed-bound.
If your well-being is being harmed by comments on 3FC, I would not encourage you to go looking for other sites, because you're going to be torn apart. When I first joined 3FC, I also belonged to other weight loss sites, and was used to the more argumentative sites, so 3FC seemed incredibly oversensitive to me. There was so much focus on tolerance, that some (to my opinion) very interesting and valuable debates got squashed. Eventually I realized why. 3FC is one of the most tolerant, kind, gentle and diverse of all the weight loss websites.
If you find 3FC-style disagreements with your personal philosophy harmful, the other websites are going to seem like **** itself.
Ironically, if I had read your post on any other website, I would have guided you here - because 3FC is the closest I can think of to what you say you want.
I can't even think of an in-person weight loss group that meets your requirement, because every weight loss group I've ever joined has always had diverse membership (the closest was a WW meeting specifically geared to people who had started with at least 100 lbs to lose - although even then some members with far less weight to lose would attend because it was the only meeting that fit their schedule).
Last edited by kaplods; 09-14-2011 at 12:58 AM.