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I'm back and recommited to losing the rest of the weight.

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Old 09-05-2011, 01:20 PM   #1
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Smile I'm back and recommited to losing the rest of the weight.

I've been an off and on again 3FC member for about 3-4 years (?) I take looong breaks when life gets in the way of putting myself first. For instance, I met a great guy in June 2009, we dated, moved in together and then got married June 11, 2011. While meeting him was a HUGE positive for me, I put off losing weight while we were courting and newlyweds as this.guy.loves.to.eat.

I don't mean just chips and dip in front of the TV. When we first met we ate out at nice restaurants 5 nights out of 7. I was mostly careful and only gained back about 10 lbs of the weight I lost. We curtailed the eating out most nights as it just got too expensive. We only eat out now maybe 1 time every 2 weeks.

I'm sure it won't come as a surprise that a guy that likes to eat is a big guy. At 305, he always prided himself (delusion perhaps?) that he was fat but fit...as I did. Well in the last 3 months he's had 3 wake up calls that his life style had caught up to him. High Blood Pressure, Sleep Apnea and now a serious back injury caused by improper lifting but also from carrying the 200 extra lbs right in his belly (weakened core muscles, etc). The Orthopedic back specialist embarrassed him all to **** when he said, point blank..."What I'm doing right now is only a temporary fix if you don't lose weight". (He did a spinal injection of cortisone and lidocaine to shrink the disk that had bulged and to numb the nerve that was getting pinched by the disk.

He's scheduled for his 2nd procedure on his back as the first one only gave 50% relief, just got fitted for his C-Pap for the apnea, took baby steps toward joining a gym. Last year when I was on my quest for health he was very supportive but did not join me, just watched me eat healthier and increase my activity level.

Last night as our last hurrah,we start our "getting healthy together plan" today. We went to our favorite Buffet place. I ate reasonably having lost my need to "get my monies worth" the last go round with "getting healthy". But my husband really went all out 4 or 5 trips including dessert.

Half way through our meal this very large lady rolled in on her scooter and sat herself at the table next to us. God Bless her, she must have weighed 600lbs. I tried very hard not to judge nor to stare at the 6 plates she had piled high in front of her not making separate trips but getting all 6 plates one after the other and placing them all in front of her. I don't suppose she wanted pity but I felt sorry for her. It's a chicken and the egg thing for sure, which came first the loss of mobility and then the weight gain or the weight gain that causes the loss of mobility? Is it any of my business? NO.

My husband and I both were struck by her appearance and the quantity of food she placed in front of herself. I do not believe in coincidences and believe that there was a lesson to learn there. #1 Don't judge-still working on this one!! #2. There WE are if we don't stop our ways. My husbands back injury prevents him from walking comfortably and we've actually resorted to using a scooter just like hers while grocery shopping for him. GAH!

I'm back and I'm committed to getting healthy. I'm hoping my husband's recent health crisis is motivating enough for him to join me.
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First Mini-Goal: Lose 10 lbs. Met 2/22/2010
Second Mini-Goal: 20 lbs. down Met 4/23/2010
Third Mini-Goal: Lost 10% body weight (27 lbs down) Met 9/13/2010
Fourth Mini-Goal: Lose 8 more lbs to = 40 lbs lost :
Back on track:9/5/2011 First goal: get back to 246
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Old 09-05-2011, 01:25 PM   #2
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Good luck! I hope you're husband and you are able to do this together. It's always easier when your mate is willing to travel the same path. =)
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Old 09-05-2011, 01:37 PM   #3
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The Orthopedist recommended The Atkins or The South Beach diet for my husband. He personally lost 40 lbs with Atkins and sticks to that lifestyle. I've lost weight before with Atkins but had the most success with plain old counting calories. If my husband wants to do Atkins, I'll do it with him for sure.

I finally found the love of my life and I want many years with him. We're only 44 and 49!
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First Mini-Goal: Lose 10 lbs. Met 2/22/2010
Second Mini-Goal: 20 lbs. down Met 4/23/2010
Third Mini-Goal: Lost 10% body weight (27 lbs down) Met 9/13/2010
Fourth Mini-Goal: Lose 8 more lbs to = 40 lbs lost :
Back on track:9/5/2011 First goal: get back to 246
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Old 09-05-2011, 02:56 PM   #4
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Welcome back! I'm glad to hear that the two of you are embracing this together. I think that will make a big difference for both of you, but especially him.
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Old 09-05-2011, 03:12 PM   #5
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Welcome back! Hopefully your husband will want to do this with you and have many happy healthy years together
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Old 09-05-2011, 05:49 PM   #6
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Welcome back, Michelle. And congrats on being newly wed! I find just cutting calories and being more active has been the best route for me. It isn't really a diet in my mind. It's just eating the way you are supposed to eat to be healthy. Good luck to you and your hubby in this journey. I hope the both of you make great progress.

I also believe things happen for a reason. I hope seeing how much that lady ate was a reality check and it's a mental picture you both can call up when you need to.

Lin
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Old 09-05-2011, 09:05 PM   #7
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good for you for getting back on track - and how great that you and your new husband can support each other and work together towards the wonderful goal of better health.

In addition to the food and lifestyle changes, have you thought about finding a new hobby or activity that you could enjoy together that would take the place of some of the focus on food and going out to eat?
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Old 09-06-2011, 01:13 PM   #8
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Good thought about what we can substitute for an activity instead of eating...I am hoping to be an exercising couple soon. After his next back procedure, I'm hoping he'll go to physical therapy and then be released to exercise. We've planned on going a local gym, the package comes with personal training, etc.

I SO want to be healthier and really want him to be healthy and happy. His weight is really bothering him now...he had a boys weekend with his two old college buddies, they meet for a weekend in Vegas...his best best friend was very standoffish to him and later admitted in email after the trip that he was annoyed and disgusted with my husband's weight gain. They had been health freaks in college and competitive bike racers. Anyway, his weight has his self-esteem down.

We'll definitely be looking for a hobby or activity that can replace our old hobby of fine dining!
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First Mini-Goal: Lose 10 lbs. Met 2/22/2010
Second Mini-Goal: 20 lbs. down Met 4/23/2010
Third Mini-Goal: Lost 10% body weight (27 lbs down) Met 9/13/2010
Fourth Mini-Goal: Lose 8 more lbs to = 40 lbs lost :
Back on track:9/5/2011 First goal: get back to 246

Last edited by Michelle98272 : 09-06-2011 at 01:13 PM.
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Old 09-06-2011, 01:18 PM   #9
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Welcome back. This has been the most successful I've been at weightloss in my life, and I do believe it is because my hubby and I did it together. (Although he had less to lose than I did, but once he was on board with losing 35lbs, it really helped to have his support as teammate).
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Old 09-06-2011, 01:35 PM   #10
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Welcome Back!

I think it's great that you are both trying to get healthy. It really doesn't matter if you adopt the same plan or not, you both need a plan that you will stick to. Sometimes just being on the same page re: the junk is enough.

For me, I looked at my many, many years of unsuccessful weight loss and tried to identify the problem. The problem was it didn't matter what plan I was on, I just never stuck to anything. So my goal wasn't as much about the plan, but about sticking to it. I chose calorie counting because I found it easiest to fit into my lifestyle. And then I committed to staying within that calorie limit for 1 year. EVERY day for 1 year. At first it was about just staying within the calories. Then I started watching what those calories were. And now I am even exercising. But if a really bad day comes along and the eating isn't ideal, no matter what I stay with my calorie range and I make it to the next day...on plan. Find what works for you and stick to it!
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Last edited by Sandi : 09-06-2011 at 01:35 PM.
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