I'm just past mid cycle again and the scale has been bouncing AGAIN this week and is driving me mad.
It stuck at 157lbs the time I really noticed, then at 146lbs, and now it's stuck again. The lowest number I saw last week was 140lbs and I've been giving it my all to get to under 140lbs by christmas, which will be a number I don't ever remember seeing as an adult. However with this mid cycle bounce I was back up to 141.5lbs on Monday, and have been 141lbs for the past two days.
My rational side is telling me it is the mid cycle issue and to stay calm, but the other side of me is freaking out completely as usual. The best christmas present I could ever ask for is to be under 140lbs and I want it so much it hurts. All the milestones along this journey have been great, but this is one I never thought I would EVER achieve, and it's as if I've put up a barrier now that means I really won't ever achieve it.
Like I said, whilst part of me is thinking just carry on, it will happen, the other is thinking that maybe this is the lowest I'll ever get (the lowest I remember being was 140lbs for a while back in my early 20's). Another small part of me is completely losing it and thinking that all the weight I've lost is going to start going back on now...
When I started this journey I weighed weekly only on a Friday, but for maybe the last 6 months or so I've weighed daily. I thought it was helping, but recently I'm seriously thinking it isn't. I know it shouldn't but the number on the scale sets my mood for the day. A stable number means a stable mood, a new low means a happy day, a gain and all is not right with the world. I know this is a problem and that worries me. I have recently become much calmer and more relaxed about my eating and exercise routine (that doesn't mean I've been slacking, have just got less obsessed and freaked out by things I know I can't control), but the scale thing is just driving me to distraction.
I think I need to go back to weighing weekly again, but then again I'm scared to do it. Like now for instance, I NEED to see that number coming back down, I NEED to see if I'm going to be able to get under 140lbs by Christmas, so the daily weighing continues, as do the mood swings. I know I'm putting too much pressure on myself and the stress isn't helping, but how do I stop?
Do I set a date and say, as of this date it's back to weekly weighing? And if so, what date?
I'm happy with my food intake and exercise routine, it's the scale that is causing these problems, so how can I take away it's power whilst still making sure I'm heading in the right direction?
Any ideas, advice, or a kick up the butt and telling me to stop whining would be welcome please?