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Old 11-07-2002, 01:23 PM   #1
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Unhappy Help! I need somebody!

Hi all,

I am new here. I'm trying to figure out where to start. Two years ago, I gained 40 lb. This put me up to 250 and for my frame, I really ought to weigh about 130-140. So, I need to lose 100+ pounds. This seems so overwhelming to me at times! One of the side effects that I have noticed from this last 40 pounds is depression. I have felt less social in the last couple of years and have tried to get out of social functions when possible. I am married and I have kids, so, I do I have regular live person interaction. I know that what I need most now is a plan of action and support. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

~Coleen~
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Old 11-07-2002, 04:37 PM   #2
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Welcome Coleen, we are all glad you have joined us.
I, too, have come from the same place you have. I am married with two boys, and when the weight came on (about 2 years ago) I really began struggling with depression. I have found that these people here have been very supportive in my struggles and yo-yoing.
My advice to you is to journal, drink lots of water, and talk about it. Don't try to lose all the weight at once, focus on reachable goals (2 pounds this week, or 5 pounds by Thanksgiving). Join in on the challenges. They are a great way to keep motivation up and keep track of what you are doing right or wrong.
Most of all, keep your chin up. Good luck and I hope to see you post often!
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Old 11-07-2002, 04:44 PM   #3
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You are not alone. Welcome Aboard!

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Old 11-07-2002, 05:17 PM   #4
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Sometimes if you look at it like 100 lbs, it seems to big to manage. Think of it in small chunks. Like 5 or 10 lbs. And focus on the small goals. After a while, they add up.

Welcome to our board. The ladies here are amazing. Start reading, start posting. Glad to have you!!
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Old 11-07-2002, 08:02 PM   #5
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Even though I don't have kids I can totally relate to the little social interaction since I moved to a strange new city recently.

What I did was went to my Municipal Pool and signed up for water aerobics classes. Not only was my butt moving, but EVERYONE in the class needed to lose about 100 pounds and I was interacting socially with people. I wasn't embarrassed and I was having fun. The classes were $3 and I come home glowing because I've had such a good time. There were a lot of mothers in the class and usually their kids were taking swimming lessons in another part of the pool.

Hope you might try it!
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Old 11-07-2002, 09:14 PM   #6
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Welcome, Colleen.

I am facing almost the exact struggle as you. Last year was my first year teaching, and I put on 40 lbs. in eight months. I took off 25 of it, but have gained all but 9.5 lbs. back. My problem is that I don't try hard enough. I want that magic pill that's going to have me waking up lookind like Cindy Crawford!

Seriously, all the advice you're getting so far is good. It really boils down to three things: eat right, exercise, and drink water.

Stay with us. You will find some really awesome support in here!
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Old 11-07-2002, 09:39 PM   #7
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Coleen,
I am just starting out too. I have about 115 pounds to lose and am optimistic about it. I am looking at the future more and imagining what I will look like at the end of a year if I eat healthy foods in moderation each day and exercise at least half an hour as well. Also, I'm setting up a web site in which to keep my journal. Jenniffer is right! We are not alone. Each day offers an opportunity to be healthier. Days turn into weeks, weeks into months and before you know it, a year is over. If after a year you want to go back to eating unhealthy foods and not exercising...then you can. I'll bet we will be so awesome at the end of the year that nothing will make us go back.
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Old 11-07-2002, 11:13 PM   #8
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Wow! This is a great place. Thank you all for the advice and most of all the support. I really, truly appreciate it.
Right now, I am at a place in my life where I do not get any exercise. As a matter of fact, even one flight of stairs has me out of breath. What do you all do for exercise? What advice can you give me on how you stick with it? I think walking would be the best thing for me for now. Do any of you weight train? If so, how and when did you start?
As far as food goes......my problems are fat and sugar. Funny thing, I love just about every vegetable known to mankind,so, liking them is not a problem. Please tell me, what changes you have made in the way you eat? I decided that my first goal ( and I'm stating it here for a reason) is to give up coke and fried foods, that would be a great start for me. Coffee is another story entirely, perhaps that will come later. How much water do you drink in a day?
Do you all journal at home on paper, or online? Which is your preference and why? In the past when I have kept a journal, I never felt like I was doing it "right" ( gee, that sounds healthy...lol ) I tend to get into the habit of writing"Woke up, had a cup of coffee, fed the dog, took a shower......etc."

Anyway....I'm happy to be here and thank you all for the warm welcome and for putting up with my endless questions.

~Coleen~
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Old 11-08-2002, 12:16 AM   #9
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well, you've already been welcomed by the best around here, but let me add mine as well...

and you've asked some fabulous questions. and i can put in my two cents here!!!!

first, the exercise. yes. it's hard at first. and the surgeon general has now recommended that we all exercise an hour a day. YEAH RIGHT!!! but we don't have to do it all at once. and if walking is a strain, try marching in place. especially during commercials. it gets you up and moving, and IT COUNTS AS EXERCISE! some folks around here weight train, and for more information, find some of the threads written by nasus40. a great lady with lots of information.

one year ago, i had worked my way up to walking 80 feet at a time on oxygen with a cane, and now i walk about 2 miles a day with an undertrained rottweiler and no oxygen and no cane. a little at a time. literally one step at a time, and be realistic with yourself. if a half mile is too much, be happy with a quarter mile, and increase by even 10 more steps a day.

but i suggest working up to it. you are trying to make a whole lot of changes, and it's actually best to make one or two at a time, just as you have planned with cutting out coke and fried foods. each change becomes a habit and then you move onto the next one.

caffeinated coffee DOES NOT COUNT AS WATER, so you can still have your morning high-test, but you can't count it. there's not a single person on this board who drinks less than 64 oz of water, and many go up to 100 or more. things like crystal light, SF lemonade, water with a few drops of flavoring all count towards your water. so does V8 and tomato juice, chicken, beef, or vegetable broth, herb teas. watch the other juices because they have lots of sugar, and you might as well drink soda. and if salt is an issue, avoid the V8 as well.

as for eating changes, don't use me as a model!!! but many obesity experts recommend eating at least 80 grams of protein a day. for a guide, 3 oz of tuna [a little over a half can] has about 21 grams. 1 oz of cheese has about 8 grams, an extra large egg has 6 grams.

journaling. i don't do it and i should. my preference would be to do it on line. on the computer. anywhere other than paper, but that's just the way i think best. the key is to be honest with yourself, and focus on what's important: how you're feeling, how you're viewing food, whether you're using food to comfort yourself or to swallow your anger or or or or... the possibilities are endless!!!

once again, the important thing is to start! and you've already done that.

please be a regular... it'll be ok. and actually kind of fun!!!
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Old 11-08-2002, 09:27 AM   #10
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Lots of good advice, and I'll add my two cents worth.

Sugar and fat: IMO, the sugar is what really, really kills you, because it makes you crave more -- and not necessarily more sugar. Sugar can make me crave potato chips. Start small and cut out the sodas. I've had to do this several times before. It's not easy, but if you stick to your guns you can do it and before too long you won't miss them. Some people like to switch to diet drinks, but personally I don't like the taste, and it's better just to drink water instead!! As for coffee, I've never stopped drinking it, I just stopped putting sugar in it! I use sweet & lo. Some may disagree with me on the fat, but I think it's just a matter of not going crazy about it ... you do need a certain amount of fat, and it's very filling. I don't use any of the low-fat foods because most of the time they remove the fat and add some form of sugar to make it taste decent. You might want to check out some of the low-carb diets elsewhere on the board.

But most importantly with the eating, it may be very difficult for you to just dive right into some kind of eating plan. If that is so, make small changes (like the sodas).

Exercise: VERY important, especially for your depression. Walking is good, and something you can do with your kids. I highly recommend weight-lifting. I've been doing it for nearly 6 months now, and it has changed my attitude completely. I started out by ordering a workout tape (Joyce Vedral is what I got) and some hand weights (started with 3, 5 & 8#). Now I belong to a gym and I vary my routines every couple of weeks, sometimes taking classes, sometimes doing machines, sometimes doing free weights. If money is an issue, you can find books at the library with routines in them (Body For Life comes to mind; there are a lot of people elsewhere on the board that love it). Dumbbells are pretty cheap -- usually about 50 cents a pound -- and you don't have to have a bench (I use the floor, the coffee table and pillows if I have to prop up a bit!). As you can see, I'm really pumped about lifting weights! I truly believe it has made the biggest difference for me ... it boosted my energy and outlook almost immediately.

You didn't say what age your kids are ... if they are small, take them out to the park and get in a little socializing with the other moms. If there's one close enough, walk to the park!

Good luck!
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Old 11-08-2002, 11:30 AM   #11
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Ok,
Pen is right about the exercise. It is very important, but remember to find something that you like. I personally, do not like to weight train. To me it is boring. I do walk a lot, swim several hours a week, and ride my bike (all of which I do with the kids).
About the food, cutting out soda is a great start. I think that I lost 5 pounds in the first week that I cut soda out, and I didn't even drink that much of it to begin with. Aviod your trigger foods for right now, if you know that 1 cookie will send you into a frenzy, don't eat the one cookie. And portion control is your best bet. Pay attention to the box and what is a portion.
Everyone here has great ideas, I just hope that you find some that work for you.
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Old 11-08-2002, 11:55 AM   #12
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Just passing thru, so I will add my 2 cents later at lunch, but for right now:

About the caffeine:

Not only does it not count as water, but it's a diuretic, depleting your body of water. So for every cup of coffee, you should have 8-16oz of water (I read that in SHAPE magazine, I think)
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Old 11-08-2002, 12:47 PM   #13
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Thank you all for the great advice! I am going to make it easy on myself and start by walking daily and giving up soda. The fried food part sort of just falls in there since that is something I only do when I eat out and I haven't been eating out much lately. Cooking around my house can get interesting at times because two of my kids are vegan. My kids are 18g,16b,14b,12b and 10b. My 16 year old son has a weight bench and weights, I just need to learn how to use them. He has also offered many times to take daily walks with me. What time of day do you all walk? In the past, I have prefered the evening, but I may switch to early morning.

Thanks again and I'll be back later

~Coleen~
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Old 11-08-2002, 02:36 PM   #14
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Exercising in the morning is often recommended for many reasons ... I like it because it gets it out of the way plus it gives me a boost for the rest of the day. If you schedule it in the evening, it's SO easy for things to pop up to give you excuses not to do it! (especially with so many kids around!)

And, hey, why not see if your 16 yo can help you out with those weights? Just make sure you start with rather light weights, but not so light that it's not at all challenging. You can really make a big difference by working out 3x per week for about 1/2 hour. Check out the library - you'll certainly find some books that will be very helpful ... in particular, see if they have something about wl for women.

Funny, I find walking boring!!! Ah, to each his own!
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Old 11-08-2002, 03:07 PM   #15
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With your kids being vegan, it's a great time to break into some new recipes that the whole family will like. Try to stay away from just using pasta. I use TVP (textured vegetable protein) for a lot of things. It boosts your protein and it is low in calories and fat. Plus soy is good for you.

I was vegetarian for a long time so don't fall into that misconception that vegetarians are thin. Pasta can pack on the pounds like nobody's business. Allrecipes.com has some great vegan recipes.
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