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Old 10-21-2010, 11:52 PM   #1
lottie63's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 2,709

S/C/G: 344/321/220

Height: 5'5

Default SO's healthy eating struggle, motivation and enablers

Hey everyone, I know I usually post looking for encouragement or advice for myself but honestly I just need to talk to someone about what is going on in my life right now, feedback or encouragement on this wouldn't hurt either though now that I think about it. ha.

So, my bf in 2004 or so weighed 252 lbs. That is his high weight. Anyhow, he once got down to 185, and then after that settled in between 205-220 for the next few years.

It seems whenever he wanted to lose, he just....would. He never needed help, or support, or encouragement, he would just eat less, move more. (which when people tell me that I get so mad! ha.)

anyhow, for some reason he has started having an emotional eating problem. I think he weighs 222 lbs right now. He feels like he can't control himself. He said he never feels hungry, he just eats and eats. Things at work have been bad lately, they lost someone, and he's overcompensating for over a month now because no one has been hired to replace the other guy, Things at work were breaking and things just were NOT going well. Making his life more difficult.

Then, some stuff happened with me, in September I fell (note: I have fibromyalgia) this fall was pretty bad, I sprained my ankle and went into a month long flare. All I did was talk about pain. I feel bad, unloading on him like that. I had enrolled in school and had to drop out because of the flare. I am not longer flaring, and things are calmer for me, but still bad for him. He is so stressed out he is feeling miserable. He is turning to food for comfort.

I feel good that I am at least in a positive head space with my eating. So I am trying to be supportive and encouraging for him and trying to nudge him away from indulging in bad habits. (I just talked him down, from a soft pretzel at the movies!). He DOES have enough cals, but it's early yet, he goes to bed around 7 am, if he uses them all now he is sure to go over on his limit later when he is actually hungry. He is sparking, and he has a list on the fridge of things to do everyday to motive himself.

1.) track all his cals
2.) Spend at least 30 mins a day on spark reading for information/motivation
3.) Blog daily about his weight loss journey and the things he's trying to deal with.
4.) Watch an episode of Ruby. (He gets very inspired by weight loss stories. hehe. and we both just recently discovered ruby on netflix.)

Anyhow. Normally we would be enabling each other right now. I even had a diet buddy last year and we did great for awhile, then became enablers to each other! I am now trying to help her get back on track as well, and trying really hard to help my bf. I text him during the day at work with little positive reinforcements. I know if I don't have a reminder, I will eat something and then wonder why I did it.

So all in all I am being my boyfriends little chubby angel on his shoulder motivating him. Because I KNOW there is a devil on the other side.

I know a lot of people here have gone on this journey with their SO's, so, just wondering if anyone has any advice or has ever dealt with someone else like this? I feel like if I fall into a negative head space it will be easy for us to enable each other again.
"Success is not final, failure is not fatal, it's the courage to continue that counts." --Winston Churchill\

Check out my weight loss blog!: www.beyondwillpower.blogspot.com
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