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Old 09-02-2010, 02:24 AM   #1
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Default Bit of a grim death situation

As in "hanging on like grim death/for dear life".

It's very busy at the minute at work, with some quite heavyweight things to do: trying to decide whether an application for marriage is genuine/a funeral miles away but the family wanted me (that's this morning) and so on. Plus making sure preparations for mother's 90th birthday next week are on track.

I was doing OK though. Then I went into town to find out about a new mobile phone. I've done a lot of research, coming down for an HTC Wildfire but I needed to actually lay hands on one. I went to the Virgin shop and really liked the handset ~ but the assistant was so sullen and rude and unhelpful (just like they are on the phone!) that I left and went to Carphone Warehouse, to ask about starting from scratch with a whole new provider. He was lovely but unfortunately the computer said no.

Now, it's true that I had a financial disaster 4 years ago but since then my finances are rigidly correct; and I have albeit a tiny contract with Virgin, most of my insurances on contracts and so on, so I'd thought I was getting credit-worthy again. Apparently not, and while if them's the rules, them's the rules, I felt totally devastated, flattened. I was feeling so in control of my life, because of the weightloss, and this has just reminded me of an area beyond my control.

Yea, I can hear how pitiful it sounds but it's really dented my confidence and actually, yesterday was full of 'what's the point of sticking to a diet?' thoughts that could have easily led to a binge; but didn't. I'm still a bit cloudy this morning, really want to pull the covers over my head and eat ~ so any positive thoughts welcome! And when I get some spare time, I'll get onto my credit reference files and make sure they're cleaned up. Sigh.

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Old 09-02-2010, 02:58 AM   #2
it IS all about me!!!
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Oh, wow, I feel for you. When DH and I got together our credit was "so bad that our cash was no good", due to messy divorces and, in his case, a failed business that led to foreclosure. Anyway, we got our act together, went cash-only and over the course of 5 years paid it ALL off. We were feeling soooo good... and then a few years later we applied for a CC at Sears to buy a new range (we were remodeling the kitchen and if we'd purchased the range on their CC we would have saved 10%). We were turned down. Never saw that coming and it shook us more that we expected. Rejected by SEARS?!? We paid cash for the range, but that's beside the point. I feel your pain.

Guess what? Your credit will keep getting better if you are vigilant - I guess it's like weight loss, right? We have A+ credit now, which at one time we never would have imagined for ourselves. Life's just full of surprises to keep us on our toes.
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Old 09-02-2010, 03:11 AM   #3
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Hi Rosinante,

Try to think of it the same way as we do with our weight. You are on the road toward credit worthiness but just haven`t reached the destination "yet" but you are NOT in the same place as when you started!

I couldn`t help but notice all those flying angels you have for each 10lbs. Unfortunately you just don`t know how many you have on the credit worthiness road but I`m sure you have some.

I seem to remember many years ago when I had a problem hearing something about 5 years - at least that was way back and in the US. I don`t know much about it but I would imagine that there are some FREE sites that can give you more info re your credit status.

Don`t feel that you aren`t in control. I think you need another perspective. YOU are in control......the credit people just haven`t caught up to you yet!

Well done for not eating yourself toward "comfort". You ARE in control more than you might realize.

Best of luck with it.

Good luck with it and well done for not
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Old 09-02-2010, 03:29 AM   #4
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Thanks, guys, I appreciate your wisdoms.

Good news - I dropped nearly half a pound, so the not giving in to food yesterday worked.

True, it was a good reminder to keep on my toes. The reason my finances went wotsit up was, at root, being caught out by the Last Recession/bad "professional" advice/house hard to sell but it was also because I closed my eyes and hoped it would go away rather than tackling it.
I suppose it's the same feeling as when we try so hard all week - and the scales show no loss. It feels undeserved. The same with this: for 4 years and 4 months, I have kept track of every single penny, paid everything I could cash, refused to buy things that I couldn't afford outright - but the computer still doesn't budge its 'opinion'.

All I can do is keep plodding at this too! (but I sooooo want an android phone... )

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Old 09-02-2010, 05:01 AM   #5
Knowing I'm worth it!
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I was in the same shape with terrible credit and a really old student loan that has accrued so much interest it was triple the original loan. It took over four years to get completely out of debit.

I don't know how things work in the UK, but I had help with my credit through a bank (credit union) that helped me build up my non-existent credit so that now I have a really decent credit score. Have you tried anything like that. I know it's not enough to just pay off all your old debt, you have to start building good credit that will be reflected by you having a good credit rating so you can purchase what you want.

Good luck and don't let this get you down. It will get better!

Beating the weight off, 5 lbs at a time!

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Old 09-02-2010, 05:08 AM   #6
I Will do this....
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I don't really have anything to add except
Keep on trucking, life is sent to try us at times!

Restart 7.1.15- Am going to re-do this
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Old 09-02-2010, 09:02 AM   #7
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I know that sometimes our cell phone providers will allow a person to start a new account with a hefty deposit (something like $175). I know that's a lot, but is that a possibility at Carphone Warehouse? Also, maybe go back to the Virgin shop and see if you can get a different salesperson. There is no excuse for them to be sullen and rude to you; that's so frustrating and disappointing for you, the customer.

Buying a new phone should be fun but instead it seems like it's just a huge hassle. Our Verizon store is always super busy so you have to check in at the kiosk and then wait for one of the salespeople to become free. Ugh.

Short-Term Goal

One dancer for each 5 lbs lost!
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Old 09-02-2010, 09:21 AM   #8
Choosing with every bite.
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I don't know if this option exists in the UK. In the US if you're denied credit, you're entitled for free to the credit report used to deny you the credit. I'm sure the situation is different. Hang in there. As you see, now more than ever, staying on track with your eating plan, is so important to you.
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Old 09-02-2010, 10:10 AM   #9
One day at a time!
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No advice but wanted to send .

Persistence is more important than Perfection

Continuous effort - not strength or intelligence - is the key to unlocking our potential. - Winston Churchill
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Old 09-02-2010, 10:49 AM   #10
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No advice, but certainly I'm proud of you!

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Old 09-02-2010, 11:31 AM   #11
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Thanks, everyone!

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Old 09-02-2010, 04:22 PM   #12
in development
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In case you haven't seen it, the BBC has a good page setting out the situation in the UK.


Good luck with it. Wrestling with computers is no fun at any level, IMHO.
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Old 09-02-2010, 04:55 PM   #13
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I know the feeling, sweetie. I'm currently rebuilding my credit due to a bad relationship/break up with my ex. He put me thousands into debt and has only helped out in the absolute minimum way to pay it back [as in, only a couple hundred]. Good news is that I only have one more bill left to pay in collections [it's worth about $200] and after that, it'll move on up on it's own with me keeping up with my bills.

You can do this. Control what you can in your life and do the best you can for the rest!
Fat Girl Alchemy <--- my blog
HW: 255 lbs
UGW: 130
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