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Old 08-26-2010, 11:43 PM   #1
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Cool dud shopping trip

I needed a new outfit because I have to go somewhere to do a presentation. I have so few clothes now because I've downsized out of everything. I was morbidly obese for 20 years.

I've been very rushed lately, but I know I'm wearing a fourteen or 12 lately so I decided to drive to a nearby shopping center where there is an Ann Taylor and a Banana Republic. I really just needed a skirt and figured I could improvise something for the blouse.

How frustrating!!!! After trying on a bunch of things, I realized that I'm obviously just over a size fourteen. Some of the large tops fit, but some of the fitted blouses in 14 were too small. I even had trouble fitting some of the large belts.

I ended up going to a different store where the fourteen skirt fit just fine.

I have to fight for every single freaking pound these days, and it sure frustrates me that even after losing 106 lbs and getting into the "just overweight" category, I still can't fit easily into a fourteen.

I just don't feel that huge, but it seems like most women at my BMI can rock a 12 or less.

What gives? It brings back so many awful memories of the spot where I spent most of my teens and twenties-- I was either just into or just out of a fourteen.... I swear I weighed less then though.

Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.--Winston Churchill

Last edited by ubergirl; 08-26-2010 at 11:45 PM.
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Old 08-27-2010, 12:01 AM   #2
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You're being way too hard on yourself. Be thrilled you no longer have shop at Lane Bryant! I know it's frustrating when you don't fit in the same size from store to store, but you're going to find that problem no matter what you're size. This journey is long and so hard, just hang tight you'll get there. You've done such an amazing job!
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Old 08-27-2010, 12:15 AM   #3
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I agree - way too hard on yourself! You know there's a thread about how very inconsistent clothes sizing is. Your focus has been on how much better you feel, how much more you can do. You've come such a long way -- don't let some arbitrary clothing size get the better of you!
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Old 08-27-2010, 12:22 AM   #4
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I honestly think it just depends on the store and your story illustrates that point exactly. At two stores the 14's weren't working for the most part at the 3rd store--bingo--a 14 fits!

I am much shorter than you and weigh more yet I can wear anything from a 14 (rarely) to a 18. Sometimes I still need a 16w sometimes they are wayyy to big. Just depends on the brand. And often I can't find anything that fits because I'm STILL in between sizes. A 18 hangs on me yet a 16 is too small. Depends on the brand and the cut.

So, I'm hear to tell you that I feel your pain. But, even with all that aggravation I bet you wouldn't go back to your old size for anything in the world would you? Yes, I could always pick a 22 off the rack and it would always fit but I am rather happy to have to look a little hard for those sizes that fit even though it's more work.

It just takes a little longer so give yourself more time to shop and when you find something--do a happy dance 'cause I'm sure you look fabulous!

Last edited by ANewCreation; 08-27-2010 at 12:23 AM.
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Old 08-27-2010, 12:47 AM   #5
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I agree with the above, don't be so hard on yourself! That is so much weight to lose, don't lessen the victory because of some clothes. Clothing is so very inconsistently sized, it all depends on your body composition and the cut of the clothing, etc etc etc! Don't let it get to you. And I agree with ncuneo, be happy you're at least out of Lane Bryant!

You've done a great job already, don't let something like this get you down. It may take a little time for you to figure out what stores and brands will fit you better now, but it will come. Be happy darlin, you've done fab!!

I believe in you. I believe in your authenticity, your uniqueness, your intensity, your wildness. I love your restlessness and your hunger. You possess the energy that, if unleashed, could transform, inspire and heal the world.

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Old 08-27-2010, 12:56 AM   #6
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Uber, I'm about your height and weight, and I can't wear a 12. I *wish*. Mostly I'm in a 16 and 14. The 14s fit in the mid-rise types, but that's more a body type issue than a body weight issue.

I don't expect to be in a 12 for another 10 pounds or more, and I too am expecting that to take a while.

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Old 08-27-2010, 01:28 AM   #7
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Your weight loose is astounding!!!! Don't feel bad, just try a different store!

Cloths in BOTH of those stores runs pretty small, my DIL is 5'2 , 95 pounds(maybe less) and wears a MEDIUM at BP! The sleeves of the size small Tees there dig into her upper arms (which resemble two tooth picks!).

DIL wears a petite XXS or XS at J.Jill, which is one of my favorite stores. Even though they don't have every style in their clothing line in woman's sizes, the plus size clothes they do have are the same styles and cuts.

Also, the quality is good and they have some of the BEST on-line sales on the internet.
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Last edited by nancymae; 08-27-2010 at 01:32 AM.
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Old 08-27-2010, 08:10 AM   #8
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Yeah, those are smaller stores. I hate the mental game that plays with us.

I know weight loss has slowed way down for you. It has for me too. I lost two pounds last month and I'm looking for another of the same. Put it this way...I was psyched to finally lose 2 OUNCES this morning. Like, as excited as I usually am about two pounds! It was two ounces lower than the low I saw over a month ago.

I think the silver lining for us is that maintenance should be a breeze!! Our bodies are pretty stable.
Long term goal: To still be calorie counting 11/9/2010
mini goals: ~211-10% lost;12/24/09 ~203 class I obesity 1/28/10; ~199 Onederland/15% 2/19/10; ~188-20%; ~185 half way 5/14/10; 179-bye 180's 6/12/10; ~174 overweight 7/3/2010;169-bye 170's 8/13/10;~164-30% 10/23/2010159-bye 160's~11/1/10; 153-35%~12/23/10; 149-bye 150's~2/11/11; 145 normal~2/14/2011; ~141-40%; 139-bye 140's ~135 GOAL! (129-45%; 117.5-50%)

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Old 08-27-2010, 08:53 AM   #9
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Another chime in for fighting for every pound right now. I'm so close to 100 lbs. lost and yet last month only lost 1 pound. Now in a way it's for a happy reason, I've started dating a new guy and dinners out, no matter how carefully planned are not going to be as controlled as what I cook for myself. But there's some stress in starting up with new relationship and I've found myself slipping back into some comfort eating habits too.

I know you're dealing with a lot of stress-causing events. Even if you're not slipping like I am, I suspect a stressed body just doesn't let go of the pounds and inches as easily AND because of that we get a lot more critical.

I suggest to both of us to take a deep breath, celebrate the loss so far and coast for a bit. Eventually our bodies will adjust and start dropping the weight again or our lives will settle down a bit and allow for us to change our plans up a bit if needed.

Last edited by caryesings; 08-27-2010 at 05:03 PM.
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Old 08-27-2010, 08:56 AM   #10
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I totally agree with everyone else. Please don't be so hard on yourself. You've done such an excellent job, and like someone else has said, I think it really all depends on the store.
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Old 08-27-2010, 09:06 AM   #11
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I am 5'9" and hanging out around 206 lbs. I have 16's that are too big, 16's that fit well, 16's that are still too small, 14's that fit, 14's that are too small... it is insanity!

I find cheaper stores seem to run bigger (ex. Wal-Mart) and the higher end stores seem to be on the smaller end (ex. Banana Republic).

I agree with everyone - don't be so hard on yourself! Really - no matter what size any of us is, we are still going to have to try clothes on b/f buying them. It's not like if you got down to a size 6, you would be guarenteed to fit in all 6's.

I just bought a BUNCH of shirts from Kohl's. A lot of my XL's are getting lose and I don't want to look frumpy. So I ordered a ton of L's. Some of them fit perfectly - others are a bit snug. It's a pain!

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Old 08-27-2010, 09:40 AM   #12
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I think we have all gone through this at some point.

The way things are sized these days, you really cannot beat yourself up because of it.

I generally wear a 6 or 8. HOWEVER... I went into dress barn to get a semi-formal dress and I had to get a 14... yes, a 14. I'm 5'7'' and 145 pounds and I had to get a 14. While I had a miniature meltdown , i realized that sizes are wayyyy to inconsitent to be bent out of shape over it.

I am sure you look beautiful and you have come such a long way. Give yourself a pat on the back instead of whipping yourself.

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Old 08-27-2010, 09:57 AM   #13
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I think it's more body type than just blaming certain stores for running small. When I weighed 189, I wore a 16 to 18 in any store.
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Old 08-27-2010, 10:21 AM   #14
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I'm at 175 and for fun at the store I tried on some size 12 pants yesterday and I could ZIP them, but it wasn't pretty. I'm thinking probably at least 10 more pounds before those fit properly...

However, top-wise I easily fit into a 10. It kind of depends on your build and where the weight is coming off. I've got a nice spare tire around my waist but my top has slimmed rather quickly, and I'm rather small chested. So really, it just depends person to person I would say.

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Old 08-27-2010, 04:24 PM   #15
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Originally Posted by JulieJ08 View Post
I think it's more body type than just blaming certain stores for running small. When I weighed 189, I wore a 16 to 18 in any store.
I hope I don't sound too shallow and superficial but because I only have male children and I FINALLY have two DIL's I do lots and lots of shopping thses days...

Same here with the sizes. I fit into all 22's when I started to loos weight, noet everything size 18 fits. But this is because I stick to certain cuts and styles. I never bother with say, jeans or pencil skirts because I would need a 22 to fit my 52" hips and have to have them altered.

But BR and AT don't carry anything larger than 14/XL (and very little inventory above their size 12). Add to this that except for some skirts you body has to be in perfect proportion for the current AT line. (not just hips waste and bust, also thighs and upper arms) And really their size 14 would be considered a 12 in any other store so if you wear at 14-16 in any other store they will have nothing to fit you.
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Last edited by nancymae; 08-27-2010 at 04:31 PM.
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