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Most the time I just don't think I can....

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Old 08-16-2010, 11:04 PM   #1
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Default Most the time I just don't think I can....

do it. Lose this weight. I have been so stressed about all the dental work that is going on this month, I fell back into old eating habits. Eating cookies and brownies all day long. I know that is so disgusting...but I want to admit it. Don't worry, they are going to be GONE as soon as DH gets home...I know I should have never even brought them into the house.
Exercise is so EASY for me, in the regard I can get myself into the habit of exercising at least 5 times a week. I can push myself really hard during the workouts too. I can sometimes even convince myself to work out twice in one day, that's how much focus and drive I can have when it comes to exercise. BUT food is my weakness and sadly its the biggest factor in weight loss. 98% at least for me.
Why do I give up on myself so easily?? I can eat good for a week, maybe even a month, but then I give in and it starts the slippery road back down to old habits. And its like I don't even try to stop myself.
I feel myself floundering....and I just don't know what to do. I don't want to go back up though and have to start all over again...
I guess I am just reaching out for help....guidance....something....
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Old 08-16-2010, 11:48 PM   #2
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You can do anything you set your mind to! Dust yourself off and get back on track. First of all, don't bring anything in the house that has the potential to sabotage you. The next question i always ask myself when facing brownies or cookies or whatever is, is this going to make me happy? Is this really worth gaining back weight? Is it worth it? By then, I have no problem saying no.
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Old 08-17-2010, 12:14 AM   #3
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Make time for yourself on moving your body..do something that will become a daily habit. I promise you, you will feel better.Don't give up!! You can do it..Do what I did, stop the self pity talk and Move, move your body!! Only you can do this. So Cheer up and stay positive!!
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Old 08-17-2010, 12:24 AM   #4
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Unless you are immune to the laws of physics, you can do this. Fortunately, I think that only people like Spiderman and Wonderwoman are truly immune to the laws of physics.

That might sound like I am being harsh, but it actually helped me to realize this. My body isn't so special or so different that somehow all these other people are able to lose weight and I am not. I had to realize that they were putting in more time and committment than I was, and that was the difference. I had to come to the realization that people who lose consistently and keep it off are not noshing on brownies and junk like you and I seem to like to do sometimes.

I do think you can do this. I think I can do this. The question is.....will we? Because it's in our control. It's our decisions that will determine whether or not we will do this. Yes, we can. But will we?
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Old 08-17-2010, 12:25 AM   #5
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its hard. On Friday or Saturday? I can't remember when, I ran into a drugstore to pick up two sodas for me and my husband. I saw...a bag of caramels. I passed them up twice, and then walked back and picked them up.

(I still drank a diet soda though, thats a perma-lifestyle change I made when I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes my first pregnancy, so even when I mess up, little permanent things I've changed remain consistent positive anchors, like NO sugar drinks, ever ever ever. Water or diet soda or V8 only)

Anyways. Those caramels were the best thing that hit my tongue in over a months. Juicy, sweet, the way the just sink into your teeth in their cavity causing goodness and caress and massage your gums while relaxing with sugary gooey goodness and being the most wickedly delicious creation on earth......


I kidded myself by saying I shared with the kids, I might have shared 5 pieces with the two of them.

I ate the rest myself.

Yes. the same day.


I thought about beating myself up about it. BUT I know a few things: like the drink for example, some positive habits will stick with you when you're doing your best to make permanent healthy choices for the rest of your life.

yeah. I messed up one day. Next time...maybe one or two and then put the bag away til the next day!

Most importantly, just keep trying! Don't give up permanently ever! Yeah you might screw up! But you're doing GREAT! You're getting on here, reading stuff, sharing stuff, talking about it, exercising, DON'T GIVE UP!!! (these are some little permanent changes that you're already keeping up even when you're messing up, these are positive choices that are sticking!) you can DO THIS! Just keep at it.

My way of getting rid of the bag of caramels was by eating every last one of them with my greedy sticky pudgy fingers! Not a great method, but I've done pretty good all day today, even though I over did it on peanutbutter yesterday (I could write two textwalls on how amazing peanutbutter is :P )

You can do it! Don'T give up! Keep at it! keep reading! Keep educating yourself! Keep exercising! And don't GIVE UP!

Last edited by boots : 08-17-2010 at 12:28 AM.
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Old 08-17-2010, 07:08 AM   #6
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You are a do-er. I am a do-er also! We can do, do, do till the day is done. This is an active response to weight loss. It's the not-doing (not-eating) that we find difficult. That's the passive response to weight loss.

So instead of focusing on what you should not be doing (passive), I focus on what I should be doing (active). Replace the "I can't eats" with the "I need to eats". Focus on planning ahead to have healthy snacks available to you. Make a grocery list, do the grocery shopping, do the chopping, do the prep work, do the pre-packaging, do, do, do...in relation to food.

That's my best advice from a fellow do-er.
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Old 08-17-2010, 07:10 AM   #7
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Well of course you can do this. You have the ability to. You ARE capable of it.
We all are. Weight loss is not some crazy out of this world far fetched scheme. It's a doable thing for every one and any one - yourself included.

People ask me all the time how I lost so much weight and I tell them quite simply - I decided to.

Decide to do this, commit to do this - and than take the steps to MAKE it happen.

I wonder, do you set yourself up for success? Are you counting your calories, are you writing down every thing that goes into your mouth BEFORE you eat it, are you weighing daily? Do you plan out your meals and snacks IN ADVANCE? HAve you found/discovered DELICIOUS, healthy, lower calorie foods to eat? Do you take your healthy foods with you when venturing out? Do you keep the junk out of your house - no matter what? HAve you set up rules for yourself - boundaries, limits? Do you have mantras (self-talk) that you rely on?

So wanting to lose the weight is all fine and dandy, even committing to it is the same - but you've got to be willing to do what it takes to MAKE it happen.

Please, I urge you don't make this harder than need be - set yourself up for success - those questions that I just asked you - implement them. Today and every day. Eventually they will become automatic to you and natural and just *what you do* and *who you are*. When you get to that point, this gets - easy and enjoyable. But you've got to get there. You've got to get to that point and yes, you must force yourself to *just do it*, till it does become habitual. But it will. It will!

Require more from yourself. Raise your standards. Don't rely on foods that *just taste* good. Find foods that taste good and are good FOR YOU. Push yourself and push yourself. Challenge yourself. Make a game of it. Find the joy in this, not the dread. Reach. Stretch. Grow. Prosper. Discover who you were meant to be. Amaze yourself!
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Old 08-17-2010, 08:46 AM   #8
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Old 08-17-2010, 09:31 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PinkHoodie View Post
I can eat good for a week, maybe even a month, but then I give in and it starts the slippery road back down to old habits. And its like I don't even try to stop myself. I feel myself floundering
That was always me. I'd start and I'd stop. Over and over and over again. You say you feel yourself floundering, and you don't know what to do. You do know what to do, the problem is, you don't feel like it. I have found (like many others) that the real key is preparation. Take today for example. Last night I packed my breakfast, lunch and 2 snacks for the day and figured out what we are having for dinner. At lunch time, I will log all my food in fitday for the rest of the day so I know how much and what I can eat for dinner and dessert (Yes, I eat dessert EVERY day). I weigh and measure everything using my food scale in grams whenever possible. if I am prepared, I am successful. This needs to become habit, it needs to become your go-to way of living. We have to do it enough that we forget the way we used to do it.

I can do it and so can you!!

What kind of plan are you on??
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Old 08-17-2010, 10:02 AM   #10
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There is so much wisdom on this thread, but I just want to add one thought that really had meaning from me. I think I read this on the Ask Charles blog, from another 3FC member.

YOU HAVE TO CHANGE WHAT YOU WANT

That's it. It's that simple.

If you really WANT brownies, you will deny yourself for a while, but you will be filled with self-pity... you'll feel bad that you can't have what you want, and finally you'll give in.

But once you realize that there is nothing about those brownies that are really helping you... they are BAD for you, and you really DON'T WANT them, then it all becomes easier. You don't eat them

Rockin Robin always talks about how losing weight is an exciting journey not a series of painful deprivations. And it's so true.

As you go along, you realize that you give up very little to get so much.

So, if you really want to lose weight, you have to decide that you WANT thing that make you healthy, and the other stuff, you just don't want it that much.
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Old 08-17-2010, 10:06 AM   #11
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Just keep going ull get there...............we all will
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Old 08-17-2010, 11:09 AM   #12
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Quit expecting all-or-nothing perfection from yourself. That is the slippery slope, not just food. Stop hating on yourself. You're not disgusting and you're not weak. You're a strong, powerful woman who can do this. Sometimes we screw up, but if we know that's going to happen and we have steps in place to mitigate it, we can move on.

Start coming up with plans when food is hounding you. For instance, I paint my nails, take a walk, do anything to get away. Why is it set up for the brownies and cookies to be IN the house?

If I do screw up, I decide right then to go back on plan. Take a walk, plan a salad for dinner, call a friend for support, go to 3FC .

I hear a lot of dislike of yourself in your post. Remember, you need to love yourself during the journey. It doesn't help to hate yourself.
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Old 08-17-2010, 11:43 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eliana View Post
You are a do-er. I am a do-er also! We can do, do, do till the day is done. This is an active response to weight loss. It's the not-doing (not-eating) that we find difficult. That's the passive response to weight loss.

So instead of focusing on what you should not be doing (passive), I focus on what I should be doing (active). Replace the "I can't eats" with the "I need to eats". Focus on planning ahead to have healthy snacks available to you. Make a grocery list, do the grocery shopping, do the chopping, do the prep work, do the pre-packaging, do, do, do...in relation to food.

That's my best advice from a fellow do-er.
I'm pretty sure this post resonated more with me than anything else I've read here.

I wish I had more advice, but I don't. Just keep trying, keep moving. You CAN do this
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Old 08-17-2010, 12:14 PM   #14
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I know as well you can do it!! I have been there myself! I am still there at times - where I want to consume and do consume foods I know that I shouldn't. Its more about emotional eating for me than the actual food. Trying to fill some void for whatever reason it is for that day. That's something I know myself I have to continue to work on. Not turning to those "treats" to help fill that void. That is exactly what I am doing. Learning that treats should be just that not a way to help get through whatever is going on.

It's always good to look and see why you are eating what you are eating and what kind of satisfaction you feel you get from the food that you aren't finding somewhere else in your life.

Huggles - hang in there!
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Old 08-17-2010, 07:51 PM   #15
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There is some awesome advice in here. My eyes have been opened to things I can change, and how to change them to set myself up for success.
I finally sat down with DH and did something along the lines that Eliana did about committing to a year, but we did it from now until Dec 25th. We wrote everything down we wanted to accomplish with eating and exercising, and said okay we will committ to being on this plan until then. When things get hard or we want to stray off plan, we have to remind ourselves we committed to sticking to it until then. Then when it gets close to end date I really believe all we have accomplished will be exciting, and worth it, and we will committ to another 3 months maybe tweaking things that didn't work or adding new goals. I feel more confident.
I am going to try harder to plan more. I do plan out meals. But usually what happens is something takes longer then I expect while we are out, and I just say oh it will be okay to get this...I need to make some changes, and learn how to deal with situations like this that come up.
Thank you to all of you who answered. You really have helped me to see things a little differently this time.
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