Every so often I think I need to look back to remember how far I've come to appreciate where I am today. I've spent the majority of my adult life weighing in between 250 and 285, but after a bout of depression over dealing with my father's illness and struggling to maintain a reasonably healthy relationship with my ex a few years back, I gained quite a bit of weight. I was all the way up to 360, maybe even more (I was too scared to check the scale until I'd already pushed myself into losing a bit).

Anyway, the first 40 pounds or so was relatively easy once I decided enough was enough. I concentrated on eating right, exercising, and had the attitude that nothing could take me down. It slowed down after that, but I was still making steady progress with the the lifestyle changes I had made. But I screeched to a halt when I reached 285.

That was a little disappointing, as before I'd gained all the extra weight I'd averaged around 250-260 throughout my twenties. But hey, a 70+ pound loss is nothing to sneeze at, right?

Fast-forward to my early 30's and my life had completely changed. New relationship, new home in an unfamiliar state, and finding out I have agoraphobia (which actually explains a lot about my personality). I sort of went through a lot in between and had done next to nothing when it came to my health, so it's lucky for me that I maintained my 285 weight when I was completely unfocused on my health. But last summer, I decided to push myself into realizing my previous weight loss goal of 150.

I did well in the summer, lost steadily for a few months before deciding to join the local TOPS. I continued to lose more slowly, but still steadily, until this December when I got down to 250. Woo, another 35 pounds, for a total of 110 lost! But still 100 pounds to go . . .

Lots of personal things happened and I lost my focus. I do think I instilled a lot of healthy habits for myself, but without the extra pushing and extra watching, I only found myself maintaining. I've tried so many times to get back into the groove since the new year, feeling I was doing well but having the scale tell me otherwise.

So for March fourth, I planned on trying something I'd never tried before: Atkins. I read through the book and gained an understanding of how the diet is supposed to work, planned on dedicating 2 weeks for the induction phase to see if it was right for me, then proceeded to follow the instructions to the letter.

Unfortunately, I don't think that diet plan is for me. My appetite increased (I felt like a bottomless pit which hasn't been an issue for ages), I actually began to feel sick with my entire digestive tract feeling thrown off, and what little energy I'd had completely disappeared.

I only lasted a week on Atkins before I'd had enough; l I'd never been so tired or horribly cranky. The final straw was gaining 6.6 pounds in that week (I'm guessing it was mostly sodium, but who knows). So I went off the diet, started eating "normally," and lost 7.8 pounds the next week (my last official TOPS weigh-in).

I'm not sure what happened, but maybe switching it up for that week helped me? I'm feeling better than I have in weeks and and have lost another pound since. I'd felt so horrible for not being able to budge under 250 for months and now it's finally happening.

I hope I keep going this direction.

You are so hard on yourself! Everytime you list a positive, it seems like you need to subtract something. IT IS OKAY TO BE AMAZING!! You are!

You have accomplished so much and have so much more in store! I know it! You need to know it, too! Glad to hear you are on track - I can't wait to read about the success that I know is coming!!

Thanks so much to you both, your words are the amazing lift I've been needing.