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If you started out with 100+ to lose, and you are at or near goal. . .

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Old 02-20-2010, 02:00 PM   #1
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Question If you started out with 100+ to lose, and you are at or near goal. . .

When did you start to feel "normal" ? When did you stop thinking that people looked at you first as "fat" and then as a person?
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Old 02-20-2010, 02:12 PM   #2
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Well, I am not near goal, but I did have the Normal experience already, when I weighed 214 pounds (I have a good figure, nice curves and a waist so I didn't LOOK over 200).

I was at the County Fair and sat down with a plate of food. I think it was a taco salad or something. I was sitting at a communal table and a young couple came and sat across from me. One of them was staring at my food. I had been to the fair before at 278 pounds and had gotten the sneers, laughs, stares, comments etc about my weight before. So I was prepping in my head, knowing they were thinking "what is that fat chick doing eating a taco salad??" I was wrong. One said, "That looks good!" and the other asked "where'd you get that?" and we had a nice little conversation in which they treated me like a normal person. I know it sounds weird but that was THE FIRST TIME that I realised I did not look like I was hugely obese anymore. Granted I was sitting down and from the waist up I look pretty average at that weight. But it was a big deal to me. And after that I just felt like a normal person when I went out, and not a "fat person."
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Old 02-20-2010, 02:17 PM   #3
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when I was around 220... around october I guess? I was at a Halloween dance and realized that people were looking at my GREAT dancing and NOT my fat...

Now I feel normal. Thin even. And people look at me with admiration and dare I say it... envy? In their eyes. I never KNEW I was pretty... never had any idea. And I'm beginning to thing that I just might be....
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Old 02-20-2010, 02:20 PM   #4
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Greetings!

Honestly, I've started feeling "normal" only recently. I've had such a poor self image for so long, it's been hard for me to turn all that around and actually see the progress for what it is.

After 11 long months, I think how I view myself is finally starting to equate how I view my body. The problem is this: after losing 120 pounds, I still have a hard time calling myself "thin." I am thin, or at least extremely thinner than what I was, but the words just don't feel right on my tongue...or in my head.

I still have more weight to lose, but at this point, I'm feeling very normal. Some of that comes from others, but mostly I think it's about a slow change of mind that's happening inside. I'm getting to "know" my body, this new body, and I'm liking what I see. It's also about knowing, subconsciously, that I'm no longer the statistical obese woman I used to be. That, in itself is such a huge relief.

You will get there. It happens differently for everyone, but eventually you'll see it. Hopefully, it'll come sooner for you than it did for me.

All the best.

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Old 02-20-2010, 02:23 PM   #5
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Not at or near goal, but at 240 I feel pretty "normal" since I'm tall, curvy and carry it well. I get plenty of positive feedback for my appearance at that size too
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Old 02-20-2010, 02:34 PM   #6
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It's funny, I just was thinking this morning that it seems when people look at me NOW they don't see the "fat" first, they see a normal person. They react differently to me and speak to me differently than they did 69 pounds ago. This seems strange as I am still way overweight, but it's the truth.
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Old 02-20-2010, 02:40 PM   #7
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For me it was pretty recent. I can look in the mirror now (clothed, anyway) and see a normal-looking person. I still have plenty of 'fat' days, don't get me wrong. But since I hit around 160, I've felt pretty okay about how I look. Getting positive attention from the opposite sex on a regular basis (I work with the public, so I am very 'visible' all day) has helped reinforce that for me. The comments of my female coworkers on my wardrobe are helpful too.
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Old 02-20-2010, 02:50 PM   #8
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Around 215 I started to feel normal-ish. I feel normal more often then not now (when I hit under 190), but I do still have that shrunken obese thing going on, but mostly covered in clothes you can't tell too much.

Part of my problem though is I train with fit people so I'm still the "large" girl. Sigh.
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Old 02-20-2010, 02:51 PM   #9
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Maybe it would help if we listed our BMI's if they're known for when we started to feel normal, or maybe pants sizes.

I'm nowhere near goal, but I'm just starting to feel normal. Maybe it's because I'm just starting to wear 16's which in my mind are the beginning of "normal".

Weight: 198
BMI: 34
size: 16

I feel like people probably don't give me a second thought now.

One odd thing, I still feel like people should be thinking something. I was walking into the store today wondering what people thought when they looked at me and I thought I felt like a fake in this body, like this body isn't really mine, I just stepped out of 37 lbs for the day??? Weird, weird thinking. I had to remind myself that I do not have a sign on my forehead that says "used to weigh X" on it.

It's very hard to get over, this whole "normal" thing.
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Old 02-20-2010, 03:20 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eliana View Post
Maybe it would help if we listed our BMI's if they're known for when we started to feel normal, or maybe pants sizes.
Just curious, why do you think BMI would be helpful? BMI tells nothing of body shape, proportion, size, muscle mass etc.

I know quite a few sexy, lean athletes who have an 'obese' BMI, as well as sexy, curvy folks too. BMI is just a mathematical equation involving height and weight.
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Old 02-20-2010, 03:33 PM   #11
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I feel better, but not yet totally normal. I'm sure people still see me as a fat person, but not in the same way as they did over 100 pounds ago. I still see me as a fat person though, so maybe that's just me projecting my feelings onto them. I think it's less of a line ("fat yesterday, normal today" feeling) and more a subtle change. For example, even though I still feel fat, I don't dread going out in public like I used to. I still feel like people stare at me, but maybe that's the height thing more than the fat thing, and heck, maybe they aren't staring at all and I am just paranoid. I also don't fear getting dressed anymore with that horrid worry that I'm not going to find anything in my closet to fit. So those types of things feel more normal I guess.

For Eliana:
My weight: 209.4
BMI: 28.4
Size: 16
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Old 02-20-2010, 03:38 PM   #12
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My BMI is still obese at 30.5-ish...but I wear 12's and M/L tops so yeah, BMI doesn't help too much in knowing ones health/size... (I'm sorta fit so I have a bit of muscle)

I started at just over 50 BMI (size 26) though!

The interesting thing I've found is I look at photos of myself at 240 when I was feeling much smaller (not normal but smaller) and now that I'm 184 I can see I still looked quite heavy... so it's all really relative to what we're used to seeing in the mirror I think.
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Old 02-20-2010, 03:47 PM   #13
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I have just now started to feel more "thick" than fat. I don't think anyone would call me "normal", but I'm within the normal range for middle-age spread. Another way to put it: I think I look in a way that people who know/like me would probably deny I'm fat ("she's still big, but not fat"), but people who just saw me would still say fat.

I think/hope to start to feel merely plump by 190 or 180.
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Old 02-20-2010, 05:09 PM   #14
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I'm not there yet, but in the past, when I got down to a size 16, it was a good place for me, and I felt normal (and also felt very attractive too). (I was there today in my new size 16 jeans, but I know they happen to be a pair that runs very big and if I went to the store and tried on a bunch of size 16 things, they would not fit me yet)

When I first started on this journey, my initial goal was to get to that point again. However, after being inspired by so many others on 3fc, I decided to challenge myself to go a lot further in terms of weight loss than I've ever gone before, or even considered possible. I suspect that will end up making me feel differently about being a size 16. Sure, it will be nice, but knowing it's only a waystation on the way down to something much smaller, I think it's likely to not feel quite as good as it did when I was there before.
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Old 02-20-2010, 06:22 PM   #15
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I started to feel a bit normal once I was under 200lbs. When I hit my goal a few weeks ago I got a bit insecure again but things are starting to settle down now that I'm learning about maintaining.
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