Well, after whining yesterday about my slow-poke loss, I stepped on the scale this morning and realized that I had finally hit.
SEVENTY-FIVE POUNDS DOWN
That's right! Three quarters of the way to ONE HUNDRED POUNDS.
With the next pound down I'll be in the two-teens. I have NEVER BEEN in the Two-teens.
Plus, I just had a huge personal NSV. At the last minute, about a week ago, I was invited at the last minute to join an international delegation. I was really thrilled. This is a WONDERFUL opportunity.
A year ago, I would have been paralyzed-- accept or not accept?? There were so many worries: would the seat belt fit? Could I figure out what to wear? Would they be disappointed when they realized that they had invited someone who was morbidly obese (and wouldn't look good in all the PR photo ops???) In spite of all of my professional accomplishments, I used to sometimes turn down amazing opportunities like this, and if I accepted it, it was just constant mental torture. I'd be heading out right now to an expensive specialty plus size shop trying to construct some semblance of a wardrobe in size 24. I used to buy a NEW outfit almost every time I had to appear in public, because I could never find anything to wear.
Now, I have the normal worries about getting ready for the trip, but none of the trials of morbid obesity to contend with. I know I'll fit in the seat, have something to wear, and look ordinary in the photos.
Yesterday, I was feeling kind of down. With my weight loss so much slower, it's not so obvious to me any more how far I've come. I'm pretty much used to being this size, and I can't really fathom where I was before.
So, I pulled my favorite old pair of size 24 jeans off my shelf. Last year, They would have gone with me on this trip even though they are black velveteen and wouldn't be appropriate for the season where I'm going, but I always knew I could count on them to fit.
But, yesterday, I pulled them on, and there was just no way to mistake that they were FAT PANTS-- absurdly and ridiculously big. The waistband did not touch the widest part of my hips.
That's when I realized that I need to spend less time worrying and more time patting myself on the back.... I need to remind myself how far I've come, and the speed of weight loss is not SO important, because the weight does come off.
If you don't quit, you can't fail. That is my favorite saying.