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Does it bother you when people ask?

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Old 01-05-2010, 01:45 AM   #1
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Default Does it bother you when people ask?

When the subject comes up, and I tell someone I've lost 125 pounds - they usually ask two questions:

1) "How did you do it?"

2) "How long did it take you to lose the weight?"

I'm totally ok explaining that I lost the weight by basically eating whole foods and exercising, etc. But, I really get uncomfortable with the "how long" question. It actually took me about 5 years. At one point, I gained some of the weight back because I was on a certain medication for about six months. When I was able to go off the medicine, I immediately started losing again.

The thing is, I'm proud of the weight I've lost. But, I'm embarrassed about how long it took.

So, does it bother you when people ask how long it's taken you to achieve your weight loss? If it does, what do you tell yourself to keep from letting it upset you?

Thanks!
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Old 01-05-2010, 01:50 AM   #2
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I don't get the question "how long did it take" because I don't discuss it and tell anyone. That being said, of course those that are in my real world KNOW I have lost weight and every now and again I will get questions. I try not to go into much detail and usually get into a spill on whole foods and fiber--the organic thing, etc. If it's someone that I know is "safe" I offer to help them in any way I can.
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Old 01-05-2010, 02:02 AM   #3
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My god, you have nothing to be embarrassed about! You are awesome, and nobody would ever think less of you because you didn't lose all the weight at once, in a short period of time. You can say "over the course of a few years" and leave it at that, but for goodness sake don't let it upset you. The fact is, you have a greater chance of keeping the weight off by doing it over a period of time, as a lifestyle change rather than as a strict diet that you are likely to discard once the extra weight is gone.

You know everyone here is proud of you (and envious) and encouraged by your success!

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Old 01-05-2010, 02:02 AM   #4
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Thighs Be Gone .... That makes sense. I don't go around talking about it to just anyone. I usually just get the question when I run into someone I haven't seen in a long while. Then, they are surprised and ask about it.

Louisa....Thank you! I like your suggestion of saying "a few years". Part of me knows it's better to lose slowly, but there's a whole culture of fast, fast, fast. I really do appreciate your support!

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Old 01-05-2010, 02:06 AM   #5
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Why not give something positive like "well, I changed my lifestyle in X healthy way, and I've lived that way for the 6 years since" or equivalent. After all, weight loss and weight maintenance aren't such different animals, you know?
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Old 01-05-2010, 02:16 AM   #6
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Mandalinn - I like that idea a lot. It's deffinitly been a whole life style change for me. I started at 402 and now weigh 277, so I still have many pounds to lose.
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Old 01-05-2010, 02:26 AM   #7
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both questions bother me a bit, and I usually say "oh I've lost a bit and it took as long as it took", smile and change the subject. Its really no ones business except those I choose to tell. Emphasis on the "I". But I'm a sensitive soul about it so a little defensive

edit: sorry! didnt realise this was the 100lb club >.< excuse me for butting in
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Old 01-05-2010, 06:12 AM   #8
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It never bothered me - I think, often, folks are looking for some answers to lose weight themselves. Folks always want to know how long. Five years - tell them - when you lose it slowly it's more likely to stay off.

Wonderful - a fabulous accomplishment.
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Old 01-05-2010, 06:56 AM   #9
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Honestly, it sounds better to me that it took 5yrs and not just 1. It means that you're dedicated and just in it for a "quick fix and gain back". KWIM? :hugs:
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Old 01-05-2010, 07:59 AM   #10
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You're going to feel what you feel, but know that you could be proud that it took five years! Most people, if they were told it would take them five years to shed all the weight would not even get started! I think it's amazing that you stuck with it for five years. Five years?! Man, that's amazing! Not many people have the stick-to-itness necessary for that. I'm very, very impressed.

I'm still waiting for the questions. I haven't figured out how to address them yet. My current problem is thinking when I say "Yeah, I've lost 27 lbs" they'll say "Really? Where?" LOL! Or "You've lost that much and I only just now noticed?"
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Old 01-05-2010, 08:33 AM   #11
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I live in a small town and it's come up quite a bit...mainly speculation behind my back (things like I had surgery, have an eating disorder, etc) so when they have the courage to talk to me about it I tell them the weight I lost and then go into whole foods is very important, then how you have to love yourself, blahblahblah...by the time I start on the whole foods their eyes glaze over and the rest is icing on the cake I usually don't get asked how long it's taken! If I would my answer would be something smarta$$ like "long enough" lol
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Old 01-05-2010, 09:11 AM   #12
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are we not sposed to post here unless we lost 100 pounds? i love this forum because i think you guys are really inspiring and have really interesting discussions so i always come here first. If i added up all the weight i've lost in my life it would be well over a hundred pounds. Does that count? ;0P

personally, i think that this focus on trying to lose weight fast is part of what keeps people fat. I know that, when I place time related goals for weight loss it often trips me off. This is one of the things that has derailed earlier dieting attempts and is what I am trying to avoid now. If I expect to lose 2 lbs every week, I'm going to get disappointed and eventually give up. I think it would actually be good for the general public to hear MORE stories about slow weight loss.

(great weight loss, btw!)
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Old 01-05-2010, 09:13 AM   #13
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Huh. I don't think anyone's ever asked me how long before. I suppose because I move around a lot, and when I moved here I was already 30 pounds into my journey. So nobody needs to ask, because they've had front row seats the entire time.

They do ask all sorts of invasive questions about what I'm doing, how hard I'm working, how much have I lost, etc. etc. I am pretty resigned to being public property, at least as far as my weight loss is concerned, with my coworkers. They are not known for their discretion, that's for sure.

As far as your five years, I am three and a half years in and not at goal, so I'm right there with you. You're five years into the lifestyle you'll be leading for the rest of your life; there's not a single thing about that to be ashamed of!
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Old 01-05-2010, 09:15 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by katkitten View Post
are we not sposed to post here unless we lost 100 pounds? i love this forum because i think you guys are really inspiring and have really interesting discussions so i always come here first. If i added up all the weight i've lost in my life it would be well over a hundred pounds. Does that count? ;0P
Technically this forum is for anyone with 100 lbs. or more *to* lose, but anyone and everyone is welcome, regardless of how much or little they've got to lose. That's one of the best things about this forum.

I've only lost 90 pounds so far, but they haven't kicked me out yet.
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Old 01-05-2010, 09:21 AM   #15
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Yep, my understanding is that this is a place where we can feel like we're in good company among those who have 100+ to lose. Sometimes it's hard for me to encounter someone who has 20 lbs to lose who calls themselves "fat". It's just hard to hear. And in this forum I likely won't encounter that.
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mini goals: ~211-10% lost;12/24/09 ~203 class I obesity 1/28/10; ~199 Onederland/15% 2/19/10; ~188-20%; ~185 half way 5/14/10; 179-bye 180's 6/12/10; ~174 overweight 7/3/2010;169-bye 170's 8/13/10;~164-30% 10/23/2010159-bye 160's~11/1/10; 153-35%~12/23/10; 149-bye 150's~2/11/11; 145 normal~2/14/2011; ~141-40%; 139-bye 140's ~135 GOAL! (129-45%; 117.5-50%)






My "goal" story: http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/goal...goal-post.html

Last edited by Eliana : 01-05-2010 at 09:21 AM.
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