Redreine, apparently you're my long lost twin or something.
When I read the part about the elevator, I literally started nodding...me too. And I don't even know why I don't take the stairs, I just don't.
Recently I faced the fact that as much as I like to deny it, I am
lazy. It has nothing to do with the fat and lazy stereotype either. I was lazy at 135 (oh, 135, how I miss you and your size 8 jeans). The last time I wasn't lazy was when I was like 9. Oh, the energy I had then, what with the endless bike riding and hiking in the woods. What happened?
It's funny -- and not in a ha ha way -- I'm forever railing on my 15 year old stepdaughter about choices. "You had a choice when you came home from school...you could have done your homework right away or you could have sat in front of the tv for 3 hours watching Friends DVDs." Yet here I am, making the same poor choices I discourage her from making.
Instead of settling in at night on the couch watching tv or on my butt doing whatever it is I manage to do all night, I could be moving. I have a gazillion workout videos. ****, I have an iPod. I could just dance in my living room like a lunatic and it would be more productive than what I do. What I choose
to do. How can she look at me and no think I'm a big 'ol hypocrite?
And with me it's this endless loop of ridiculousness. I wind up staying up way too late for no apparent reason, so there's no way I'm getting up for that 5 am workout. So I go to work, come home and do all my domestic stuff, get tired and instead of just listening to my body and going to sleep, I push through to my second wind which throws me into insomnia. Lather, rinse, repeat. If I could just cut the evening stuff off at the pass, I could get up early and go to the gym then have guilt-free evenings of doing whatever I want.
I can't give you my magic formula to overcome the hurdles, because I don't have one (and it pisses me off!
) All I can say is that I'm trying to change things a little bit at a time. My first step is going to bed a bit earlier every night until I get myself to the point where waking up at 5 isn't horrendous. Once I get there I can start working out in the morning, and from there I can tackle whatever my next obstacle may be.
Just know that you're not alone in this. And if you have any words of wisdom or something that works for you, please share!