I had to give up the idea of striving for a lofty goal and settle into the idea of making healthy eating and moderate exercise a habit. In the past I set my sights too high thinking I was suddenly going to be athletic and very thin but I could never keep it up because it didn't fit with my personality or life style. Sadly I will never be a person who enjoys exercise. I just need to do enough for my health and get on with my life. I will never be a health food guru. I do need to find enough healthy foods I like and healthier substitutions to make a decent diet.
Windchime - I love the "my appetite is like a bratty 2 year old" comment.
I've learned to listen to my body and how it responds to certain foods. Know that it isn't that I can't eat like a normal person but that normal eating is different than I thought. Someone already said it but getting over the idea that I can eat normally after I get to goal. Normal is different than I thought. Eating how I eat now IS normal.
I had to let go of the idea that I would be "missing out" by staying away from stuff that was detrimental to my weight loss and health.
It wasn't any way to live, I discovered.
junebug41.... brilliant. That's exactly what I had to let go of, too. Like life was just going to pass me by if I didn't consume that special piece of cheesecake. And then finally figuring out that life was going to pass me by if I DID.
I had to let go of the idea that my eating was out of my control, that there was some quirk of my psychological make-up that made it "impossible" for me to control my eating.
I had to realize that when I chose to eat the wrong thing, I was in fact choosing, and that it was a bad choice, and there were other possibilities available to me.
I had to admit to myself that I was feeding myself crap as a kind of reward-- tired, stressed, bored, cranky, special occasion, whatever... I had ONE way that I was nice to myself-- by letting myself eat whatever I wanted whenever I wanted.... I had to start looking for other ways to be kind to myself, and also to realize that I don't always GET a reward. Sometimes I just have to suck it up.
I guess the last thing is that I was KIDDING myself about attempting to lose weight by "eating healthy" and "making healthy choices" some of the time. I mean, one minute I was ordering the lean fish dish in a restaurant and then next minute I was scarfing M&Ms in my car. "Cutting back" in a haphazard fashion was a complete waste of time. I needed to pick a calorie count and stick to it.
I also completely relate to the feeling expressed by so many on this thread that I always thought of eating healthy as a deprivation-- I was constantly throwing a one-man pity party with me at the center and food as the one invited guest.
I've finally managed to turn it around and realize that it's no deprivation to pass up on the food that was making me fat, sick, miserable, and constantly in this obsessive-compulsive mindset.
That it'll come off quickly and effortlessly like the weight loss ads promised.
Also that guilting myself into not eating is never worth it. My mental health is as important as my physical health, and health is more important than getting thin as quickly as possible.
I am new to this forum, but NOT new to weight loss. I have taken my weight off and put it back on several times, and this time it is different. It is different because I have had to give up the notion that my life will be perfect as soon as I am thin.... My goal of being thin was my solution to all my problems, and I was always so disappointed when I still was lonely, stressed, sad, scared, etc.. even though I was thin.
I am losing weight this time not to make my life "better", but to make my body healthier, period.
I had to stop thinking that I could just "try and eat better" and lose weight. While this may work for some people, I needed the structure of WW and the accountability. I was never just going to make healthy choices when i had unhealthy choices on the fringe of everything.
I needed (and sometimes still do) to remember that this is a priority. Slipping into old habits doesn't help and doesn't further my progress.
I had to stop thinking that people were going to think less of me for dieting, carrying my own food, sticking to my plan. I think I've earned more respect from my peers for sticking to my diet and making progress than I ever did just caving to everyone's offers. Its not rude, its just my new lifestyle
I also had to change the mindset that passing something up was deprivation, that it was somehow "unfair" that I couldn't eat <insert treat here>
this was a big one for me, and emotional eating.
so was discovering that it was ok to formulate my own plan and not follow a "diet mold." I don't even think JC or WW are bad diet programs, but honestly there were times when it felt tortorous to me following them (maybe partly because I hadn't changed my habits enough at that time). Weighing and measuring everything and watching the clock for my next meal or snack, I set myself up to fail with that modus operandi.
I had to let go of the idea that being hungry was a torture. I don't mean starving or shaky, simply having hunger. to go with that, I had to change my way of thinking that satiating hunger required an entire meal or lots of calories. now, if I feel I need something, a few crackers, a piece of cheese, a glass of skim milk, an apple.
telling myself I couldn't eat a particular food didn't work for me either, because I'd end up binging on it down the line after I'd went without it for a while. there are things I don't keep around because I overeat them, chips, ice cream, stuff like that. I eat them rarely, but they're not verboten.
My mental health is as important as my physical health, and health is more important than getting thin as quickly as possible.
The biggest idea I had to change was I needed to put others before myself. When I changed this to it's ok to put my well being first then everything sort of fell into place (with a little help from WW and this board!).
Also that it's ok to be different.....I don't have to eat what everyone else is eating at whatever misc family celebration, which we have a lot of those down here in Louisiana
The biggest idea I had to change was I needed to put others before myself. When I changed this to it's ok to put my well being first then everything sort of fell into place (with a little help from WW and this board!).
Hear, hear!
How freaking long did it take me to just announce "I'm going to the gym..." and letting everyone just get used to it.
Seems like a little thing, but it was a big one for me.
