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Feeling myself self-destruct (melodramatism, anyone?)

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Old 12-11-2009, 04:53 PM   #1
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Unhappy Feeling myself self-destruct (melodramatism, anyone?)

Hi chickies,

It could be a cumulation of factors, including two consecutive evening meals which weren't home-cooked and thus were drowning in sodium. This evening I ate at home...but for some reason I can't quite pin down, dinner left me feeling bloated and tired - in short, just like I used to feel after dinner.

On the other hand, I'm pretty tired at the end of this week and have TOM to deal with. Maybe I'm making a big fuss out of nothing. But right now I feel so dull and listless; it's like watching a big piece of woven cloth you've spent so long on slowly, very slowly, unravelling and coming apart. And it's pretty scary.

Oh well. I'm drinking lots of water and tomorrow will be better.

Thanks for listening

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Old 12-11-2009, 05:11 PM   #2
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oh babe *hugs* I can understand WHY you are feeling like that.. and I won't tell you that you shouldn't feel that way... but you are really doing wonderfully and I KNOW that you won't let this make you throw it all away! 41 lbs in 4 months? You rock... seriously.

now more *hugs* and a tissue... and another *hug*
On my own personal journey I started on September 27, 2008
Starting weight 377, Weight in spring of 2010 198, Weight in August 2011? In the 240's.
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Old 12-11-2009, 05:16 PM   #3
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Oh, thank you cfmama, thank you so much

I'm wondering if the weather isn't also contributing. It gets dark around 4pm here now, and I've been having problems sleeping.

You're right: I want to change so much that going back to "before" isn't an option. But right now everything seems quite...not actively bad, but very much blah.

I'm going to chug some more water, read a book, and see if I can get some shuteye

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Old 12-11-2009, 05:17 PM   #4
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Awww, I'm sorry you are having one of those times. It happens to the best of us and it will pass. I hope you are feeling better soon.

I quit smoking on Oct. 20, 2008 Now I right and more.

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Old 12-11-2009, 05:40 PM   #5
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You're going to feel better tomorrow!
Started 4/14/08 LINK TO PROGRESS PICS 1/1/2009
"It is impossible to live pleasurably without living wisely, well, and justly, and it is impossible to live wisely, well, and justly without living pleasurably" Epicurus
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Old 12-11-2009, 05:41 PM   #6
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Hang in there, Salsa Chip! You'll get past this. You're reacting to the emotion of the moment rather than the facts. And the facts are that sodium is not fat and there is no way you have derailed yourself with two dinners.

I think you need to hunker down and take care of yourself for the rest of the night. Take a bath, watch a happy movie, or read a good book. Then regroup and start over tomorrow. You're doing so well! You're not unraveling, that's just hormones talking. You're stronger than those feelings.
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Old 12-11-2009, 06:10 PM   #7
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I totally get where you coming from. This month I am determined that all the holiday activity will NOT be my undoing. But, like you I am having my up and down moments.

It is more 'mental' than anything else--although like you, too much sodium does a real number on my body. It's scary out there and navigating it is exhausting at times. But we will do this. Because you're right, going back to the old way is not an option.

A couple of high sodium meals will not be your undoing. You've got a good plan--lots of water! Destress. Tomorrow is a new day.

Hugs, more tissue if you need it, and a basket full of encouragement to you! Keep up the good work!
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Old 12-11-2009, 06:27 PM   #8
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I struggle with this every fall, as soon as the days start to get shorter. Recently I started taking melatonin for my sleeping issues, and while it's helped with that, a bonus is that it's helped a lot with my SAD-induced mood swings. Something to consider.

Feel better! Try to be kind to yourself. Curling up with a good book sounds like an excellent plan to me.
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Old 12-11-2009, 06:29 PM   #9
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Sodium bloat always messes with my head, even more than it does with my body. It seems like every bloody time I eat something I haven't prepared myself, and I am aware is just LOADED with salt, it sends me into a (temporary!) downward spiral, where I just about convince myself I'm blowing it, and I am going to end up right where I started, and so on and so on...

And then I pee a lot. And things start to level out, the negative feelings ease, and I realise I am being way too hard on myself, and I will be fine. So hang in there, you are doing SPECTACULARLY, and this feeling will pass.
Began 14 August 2008
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Old 12-11-2009, 07:20 PM   #10
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Hang in there chickie!
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Old 12-11-2009, 07:49 PM   #11
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Salsa Chip (love the name by the way), you're not at all alone and you've come in here for support and look at all the support you have!!!
Don't beat yourself up over going off track, we all do it, what matters most is how you move past it... get up do an extra work out, feel those endorphines and then drink some extra water and that extra bit of sodium will leave you...
You're on track now and you're doing awesome!
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Old 12-11-2009, 08:38 PM   #12
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ANewCreation is sooooo right in that "it is more 'mental' than anything else." During my whole weight loss journey, it's these self-destructive thoughts that have been the absolute hardest. For me and I think a lot of people here, eating healthy/exercise is so easy compared to overcoming the mental barriers.

I’ve felt myself sort of slip into a funk the past few days, kind of depressed and feeling fat/unattractive/.... The best solution I've found has been to be like Pollyanna and play the 'glad game.' I physically wrote a list of everything I am glad about from weight loss to life in general. It sounds really hokey and silly, but it does sort of work. It's a good way to get perspective and help you to focus on the glad, not the bad.

And always, just remember that you're not alone. We all go through funks where it feels impossible to move forward, but you just got to keep going!
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Old 12-11-2009, 10:22 PM   #13
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Salsa Chip, HANG IN THERE!!! I know how it feels to be sabotaged by those "feelings" but they are just feelings and you will be fine once the feelings pass.

Tomorrow is another day. And it will be a better one.

Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.--Winston Churchill
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Old 12-11-2009, 10:27 PM   #14
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Tomorrow WILL be a better day. MAKE CERTAIN OF IT!!! And the day after that and then the day after that. And after those 3 wonderful, better, on plan, less sodium filled-days you will be feeling all relieved and back in the groove again and these feelings that we all have from time to time will dissipate.
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Old 12-12-2009, 12:57 AM   #15
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I will only echo what has already been said. We all have those days...days when we feel overwhelmed, or unmotivated or...whatever. It will pass, as will the sodium gain.

Keep your chin up, do some self care and remember tomorrow is a new day

Takin' it one step at a time!

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Made it to Onederland!!! September 30th

Santa Shuflle 5K (Dec 5): 37:15
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