As a child I was always relatively small. Up until 5th grade when my parents divorced I was always the tiniest kid in the class. My parents got divorced and my best friend at the time ate enough for both of us. I picked up her habits and turned to food to feel better.
Later I moved in with my mom, while my little brother lived with my dad. Personally I think this is the worst thing you can do to kids, because even though my parents had joint custody I think as little kids it's caused me and my brother to have a lot of issues with each other and the opposite parent. My brother constantly feels like our mom could care less about him, and she makes him feel that way because he gets in trouble a lot and she will tell him, you're not my problem your dad has custody of you. I am like how can you tell your child that. I am a mother now, and no matter if I had physical custody or not of my child you better believe I would be taking some action.
On top of that, I remember clearly being about 11 years old at 150lbs, (my mother who has always been a small woman size 4-6) telling me I would never be as thin as her, it wasn't in my bone structure. Wether it was in my bone structure or not as a parent I could never see myself putting my child down like that. I would tell my daughter you can do anything you can put your mind too. Never would I make her feel belittled.
Recently my mom knew I had been having some financial problems because my Fiance has been out of work. I am currently in college, and still owed about 300.00 to school. I have to pay it before I can register for classes next semester. Well my step dad (her husband) calls me a few weeks ago and says his friend needs help painting his house, he will pay my Fiance to help him. I was like great this will help us alot. So I wait, a few weeks go by and I don't hear anything about it. Last week my fiance actually got a job working at a warehouse for Target and now works sun thrgh wed. Off on SAT. So I call my mom this past weekend to see what they are doing and she says helping my step dads friend paint his house. I am like I thought Tim was going to help him paint it, why didn't you guys tell me? I had been asking them probably 2 or 3 times a week, when he wanted my fiance to come over. My mom's response was well we knew he got a job so we figured you didn't need the money. I DIDN'T NEED THE MONEY! WHAT? MY FIANCE HAS BEEN OUT OF WORK FOR 2.5 MONTHS, YOU DON'T THINK I GOT A LITTLE BEHIND ON MY BILLS AND A COUPLE HUNDRED MAY HAVE HELPED AND ON TOP OF THAT HE HASNT EVEN GOT A PAY CHECK YET, HE DOESNT UNTIL NOV 27TH.
I am so aggravated by my mothers behavior. I absolutely hate blaming or making excuses because I feel like me myself shoudl have absolute control over my choices. But sometimes I honestly feel like I am where I am today, the emotion wreck, sometimes so stressed out and overweight person because of her actions in the past and still present.
In some ways I don't even want to go over there for Thanksgiving! I don't know what to do. I can't confront her about it because she will act like she is GOD and has done nothing wrong. She will blame me. She will say it's my problem. For god sakes the woman got mad at me my senior year cuz she found out I went to a party and tried to take my car away that my dad bought me. I told her NO and moved out. She didn't speak to me until graduation day, almost 6 months. What kind of mother is that?
Sorry I had to rant. Needed someone to talk to, is anyone else have these issues with a parent or relative.