I am planning on attending my first Over Eaters Anonymous meeting tonight. From July until now I have been driven by fear because of being diagnosed as diabetic in July. I am scared to death that now that my lab results are showing good numbers I will lose my drive and go back to my old ways. I wanted to binge so bad last night and I almost devoured the second half of my hubby's cookie dough - I had it in my hand! I think I need some irl support. Hubby is very supportive and doing the best he can, but he doesn't know what it's like since he effortlessly keeps a 31-32 inch waist. I'm very nervous though since I also have peoplephobia (sorry, the real word for that has slipped my mind at the moment in my terror). I am terrified. I am scared not to go and I am scared to go. Has anyone ever been to an OEA meeting or something similar? If so, can you tell me what it's like? If anyone else has "peoplephobia" and has managed to get around it could you maybe give me some pointers. I used to not be like this, I used to love people and I was outgoing, then I got a bit shy, and now I can't even hold down a job and I have difficulty leaving the house without my hubby. I don't want to be that way, I want a normal life, but I am so scared. I figure if I can manage to do this it will help with both things, the fear of the people and the food issues, but I don't know if I can do this. I'm sitting here with tears pouring down my face and shaking just thinking about it. It would also mean either skipping the gym and my C25K or going to the gym without hubby too. I have 5 1/2 hours before the meeting starts. Help!!! I'm sorry this post is so rambly, I'm not very coherent when I'm scared.