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Old 10-19-2009, 08:55 PM   #1
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Default Don't know where to Begin....

Like many people, I have tried losing weight. After my 2nd child I lost 80 pnds by counting calories and walking everyday. I felt great and truly think hormones played and important role in my success. After my 3rd child, I didn't feel so great and haven't felt right since. I have over 100lbs to lose. I've tried counting calories, etc., but pms and life always seem to get in the way.

A couple of weeks ago my son's friend told him I was huge. The day before, a child in our Sunday School class made a comment as well. I dont' know why I'm surprised. They were telling the truth. BUT, I felt awful for my son. I feel bad for my kids who can't have certain experiences because I'm not physically able to do them (ice skating,etc.).

So...where do I start. I like the idea of counting calories and I know how many to have. I just can't stick with it.


Next Goal: 195
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:07 PM   #2
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You're already off to a great start just by joining this community. I only joined 3FC's a few days ago, but everyone here is so helpful, friendly, inspiring, and encouraging. Don't let yourself get discouraged, you can do this. We all can.

I'd suggest finding something that keeps you motivated and makes you hold yourself accountable. Challenges and the Daily Food and Exercise thread are my accountability factors. Every week, I update my stats in the challenge I've joined and every day, sometimes multiple times a day, I post in the daily confessions thread. My motivator thus far has been to regularly look at the before and after pictures. They keep me inspired. ^^
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Old 10-20-2009, 12:02 AM   #3
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One day at a time...one step at a time...that's where you start. Each day is a new day.

I have 100 pounds to lose too...you are not alone. A lot of us are working through this process -- joining a board for support and help is a great place to start.
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Old 10-20-2009, 12:34 AM   #4
One day at a time....
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welcome! these ladies are a great inspiration around here. We all here are trying or have lost the big 100. Good luck and we will see you around
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Old 10-20-2009, 12:54 AM   #5
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I think the fake it until you make it plan works for many people. Sometimes it takes time to build momentum, so make your mind up to just do it. If you can string a few good days together it will build your confidence and will to continue. When you see the number on the scale drop it will encourage you to keep going. At first I didn't give myself a choice of not being on my plan. I just did it, no thinking about it, just do it. That helped me get going. Within a couple of weeks I thought, wow! I'm really doing it, and just kept on. I know you can too. Keep posting and you'll get all the support you need.

In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins... Not through strength, but through Persistence.
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Old 10-20-2009, 01:31 AM   #6
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I started with exercise. And with the realisation that I didn't have to be perfect - just improve my diet and exercise habits.

Anyway, I made the commitment to exercise for half an hour everyday. I started with walking and dancing and dvd's and snorkelling (which was mostly me floating looking at fish, but I counted it anyway), and after a couple of weeks, I was feeling brave enough to look at improving my food. I think the natural mood boost from the exercising helped me a lot, and I truly believe that success builds success.

That's what I did. Others on this site will tell you that they changed everything overnight, it was hard but they haven't looked back. My way worked for me, because I found the all out method too overwhelming, but you have to find your way. Maybe you could just practise food journaling as a first step to calorie control. Sometimes it's really useful to just find out where you are, and then work to improve from there.

And I would really recommend reading blogs and books of successful losers. It helps you to realise that it really is possible.

Oh, here's the bandwagon, right where I left it
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Old 10-20-2009, 02:40 AM   #7
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Have you looked at not only counting calories but what you're eating? I have found I am susceptible to some carby foods - notably: cold cereal, crackers (even something as simple as a Saltine), cookies, baked goods, pretzels chips. Even small portions of "diet" types of these foods set me off, making me feel achingly hollow, the need to eat and eat and eat. Very difficult to stay with it when I feel like eating like that.

So, this time I reduced/cut back/eliminated those foods and my cravings vanished. It's been pretty miraculous.

If you had asked me 10 years ago if I could live without pretzels and scones and white bread dipped in pasta sauce, I would have thought you were crazy. Those were my favorite foods!

Turns out, I don't miss them and I really don't miss how they made me feel.

Start keeping a food diary - what you eat, why you eat it, what you feel like before and after you eat. You might discover something.
SIX YEARS at maintenance weight!

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"I saw an angel in the marble and I chiseled until I set it free."
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Old 10-20-2009, 03:10 AM   #8
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I've lost and gained back weight several times throughout my life and can really relate to feeling overwhelmed and not knowing where to begin, even though I've found success before. I'm living proof that one hundred pounds can be lost one step at a time, even though I'm still in the position of needing to lose another whole hundred pounds.

This time around I chose to concentrate on making a success out of one meal. Just one meal a day. And once I felt comfortable with the breakfasts I was making myself from day to day, I moved on to lunches. Then I was having two healthy meals a day. When I felt comfortable with that, I moved onto deciding and carrying out plans for healthy dinners and snacks.

To make a long story short, baby steps were a big help for me. It makes things a lot less overwhelming and maybe it'll help you too?

Good luck, we're all here to support each other.

★ Goal for 2017: Get down to 220 ★
★ Ultimate Goal: 150 ★
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Old 10-20-2009, 03:43 AM   #9
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The advice about doing it one day at a time, just simply putting one foot in front of the other, until the next thing you know it's two weeks, has my vote. If I look ahead to the months and even years it will take me to be a normal weight I'm overwhelmed; plus I am lost as to what to do when I'm confronted with situations I used to "solve" with food. Well, I know I have a way to go with working out the kinks, because I still use food when I'm stressed, it's just that it's celery and laughing cow instead of a bag of chips and humus. I find that writing down a menu several days ahead, shopping for the food so I have no excuse not to follow the menu, and then doing some kind of exercise, is a good place for me to start. I might add too, don't obsess on the food but make a list of things you like within reason and build your menu around that. Also, if you do better on five mini meals a day, do that if you can. My strategy is to eat all my food within around 8 hours instead of the usual 9-11. I eat four times during that period and at the end I don't think about food and don't want anything else. Three meals a day don't work for me. Posting here says you are thinking about getting started and you will. You are ready. And come here every day. Just reading the posts will keep you going.

"There is no use trying,"said Alice; "One can't believe impossible things." "I dare say you haven't had much practice," said the Queen. "When I was your age, I always did it for half an hour a day. Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

Lewis Carroll
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Old 10-20-2009, 06:29 AM   #10
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People ask me all the time how I lost so much weight, as they can't seem to lose even 10 lbs. I answer them very simply, "I lost so much weight, because I DECIDED to".

I got sick and tired and MISERABLE enough of being fat and realized that I didn't have to be fat if I didn't want to be. That it really was my choice, it had been the whole time - the whole time. It WAS something that I had control over. So, I DECIDED to do it. Once and for all, permanently and NO MATTER WHAT. I decided to do it, I COMMITTED to doing it and therefore I was WILLING to do whatever it took, whatever was required, whatever was necessary. My desire to be healthy, fit and trim outweighed, overtook, and overpowered my desire for the high calorie/high quantity foods. Nothing mattered to me more then getting the weight off. NOTHING. I made it my job, my mission.

So...where do I start. I like the idea of counting calories and I know how many to have. I just can't stick with it.
I believe you start with that DECISION. That commitment. That extreme desire to be healthy and fit. Once you have/do those things the rest will fall into place. Those things will force you to STICK WITH IT. You will WANT to stick with it. Because you want this sooooo badly, you want this more then anything.

Then you make a plan and execute the heck out of it.

I'm with Glory, I count calories combining it with a diet rich in wholesome foods. The ones that diminish my cravings, keep me totally satiated, and allow me to eat a large (voluminous) amount of them. There are just certain foods that send me into a feeding frenzy. I was done with that horrible feeling, wasn't taking any chances "this time", wanted to set myself up for success and therefore I said buh-bye to certain foods. I too never, ever thought I could live a life without the flour-y/sugar-y/carb-y foods, but after a difficult 10 days or so, a miracle happened. They no longer called out to me.

Planning is essential to me. Eating healthy won't happen on it's own. It won't happen by chance. So I plan out my meals/snacks in advance, have my home fully stocked with good and healthy stuff. I've developed wonderful recipes and I LOVE the foods that I'm eating now. I wouldn't go back to my old life for anything in the world. It truly was the best decision I've ever made.

Last edited by rockinrobin; 10-20-2009 at 07:47 AM.
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Old 10-20-2009, 07:35 AM   #11
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Like Glory and Robin, I find that counting calories *as well as* being very mindful of what I eat works best for me. That means a focus on whole foods and even then, steering away from carby choices (strict limits even on whole grains, lentils, squash, yams, etc). Also, rather than focusing on what I can't/shouldn't eat, I find it a lot more inspiring to see all the wonderful things that good foods (try googling superfoods) can do for me, and by trying to incorporate more of those, naturally the junky foods get crowded out, because I am sticking to a calorie limit.

BUT, I didn't start out that way. I started with very slow steps. I did NOT have a lightswitch moment. Instead, I was like, "Well, let's make this easy change and see how it goes." I started simply with taking supplements regularly (which I feel is important when restricting calories). Then I upped my fluid intake, which is also important for losing weight. At some point I started very slow on exercise (short walks, a few times a week) and began restricted calories. I find that building on prior successes, even modest ones, works best for me. And sometimes I slip up, even on the most basic of my changes, but the thing to do is accept that and move forward.

Find a path that works for you. And if you find something doesn't work, try something else. But keep learning more about yourself and keep trying.
Earning the user name NoYoyoMa: success with Intermittent Fasting - One Meal A Day (IF/OMAD).

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Old 10-20-2009, 07:49 AM   #12
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Originally Posted by Curvaliscious View Post
After my 3rd child, I didn't feel so great and haven't felt right since.
Have you talked to your doctor about this? I'm not sure what you mean by "haven't felt right", but that sounds worrying to me.


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Old 10-20-2009, 09:39 AM   #13
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You have gotten some great advice so far, and I have very little to add.. in fact all I will add is that what made it different this time for me was that my hubby was on this journey with me, and we have dragged our kids along too.

My 4th baby was born in May, I gained 8 pounds during the pregnancy, my hubby gained over 15! Not long after baby came hubby brought home a paper for a biggest loser contest he could participate in at work. The contest started in July, I saw it as my key.. I encouraged him to start and I would work at home with him. Last week was their last weigh in, he lost a total of 40 pounds, 16% of his weight and yesterday brought home the prize money $180 bucks that he is going to spend on some more weights for our home gym.

It made a HUGE difference having him working too, I didnt have to buy myself special food, I switched the whole family to eating healthier... I think the kids have all forgotten what mac and cheese looks like
Determined to find "Fawn", the skinny chick within me!

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Old 10-20-2009, 10:46 AM   #14
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I am a calorie counter too (and I eat a lot of veggies and healthier choices too). I think you have to do as Robin said and DECIDE to stick with it instead of saying "I can't." You actually CAN, but you have to want to.

Think of it as just one day. For just one day, I CAN count calories and stay in my limit (I love sparkpeople for this). Then when you wake up tomorrow, say the same thing. You'll see results, and that will get you going.
Lost 103 pounds, regained 80+, taking it off again.
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Old 10-21-2009, 04:47 PM   #15
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Wow! Thanks everyone. I really need boost, pep talk, whatever you want to call it. The thing is, I know I CAN do it, for I've done it before. I don't know WHY I'm not sticking with it. Laziness, I guess. : ) Anyway...thank you so much for taking the time to tell me how it was/is for you.

To whomever mentioned me not feeling right...I simply meant that I'm way more hormonal than I used to me. Maybe it's age, I don't know. If I'm tired or cranky, I eat more. When I eat more, I'm tired and cranky. Now how sick is that?? : )

Next Goal: 195
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