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ever feel like you wont get there?

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Old 09-12-2009, 01:22 AM   #1
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Default ever feel like you wont get there?

does anyone else ever feel like they will never get there?

and that life is just passing them by while they sit back and watch it?

i feel like my weight is holding me back from being who i want to be and doing what i want to do i cant ... im so fustrated
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Old 09-12-2009, 02:07 AM   #2
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Yes! Of course!

I think most of the time failure comes around because we start to self-doubt. Yes, you can get there. Don't give up.

But I want to encourage you to start evaluating what is holding you back from doing what you want. You can't wait for the perfect weight to do what you want. We can't spend our life waiting. We just can't. Be who you want NOW. Think you can't? Fake it. I'm serious. Fake it long enough and suddenly -- ta-dah! You're doing it.

Being fat shouldn't stop you from being the awesome chica you want to be.
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Old 09-12-2009, 03:16 AM   #3
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A lot of the time I feel like that, especially as this is the 3rd time I've lost a shedload.
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Old 09-12-2009, 03:47 AM   #4
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You WILL get there, you have to believe that and tell yourself each and every day. Look how far you've already come, you are almost half way there already.
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Old 09-12-2009, 04:00 AM   #5
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Quote:
does anyone else ever feel like they will never get there?
No, no, no, no, no.

You musn't ever let yourself think this way. You will get there. You will. You must. And not only will you get there--you will stay there, too--whatever it takes. Now, it may take a while! It may take losing only one pound one week and staying at the same weight at other times...but honestly, you will get there, you will.

Because what's the alternative? Really, what's the choice, here? For me the choices go like this:

Do I really want to be fat the rest of my life? Do I really want my husband to have to hire pallbearers to carry my coffin when I die? Do I really want to risk never seeing any grandchildren which may come along? (My kids are 9 and 11...) do I really want my husband to live on without me, lonely in his old age?

What about nice decent looking clothes? Am I really willing to give that up for the rest of my life? And swimming? Do I really want to not be able to do that forever, too? And what about taking long hikes to watch the leaves turn--am I willing to just sit in the car to enjoy the great outdoors--forever?

Do I really want to be out of breath whenever I climb the stairs? Do I really want to not be able to bend over to pick something up off the floor because it hurts too much? Can I really sleep surrounded by pillows to prop up all the different body bits so they don't hurt so badly I can't get out of bed when I wake up? Do I really want to have to call someone or find a chair in order to get up off the floor when I absolutely have to get down? Do I really want to tie my shoes on the side forever?

Or do I want to wear whatever I can afford, do whatever I want with my body when I want to and be free of this prison of fat?
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Old 09-12-2009, 07:11 AM   #6
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Quote:
and that life is just passing them by while they sit back and watch it?
10000% I felt this way. Exactly. I wasn't living up to my full potential, not even close. I know you're supposed to love yourself even though you're heavy - and I did. That wasn't the issue. The issue is that I couldn't physically do many of the things that I wanted to. I was definitely on the sidelines looking in. Not any more. I participate. I'm active. I'm energetic and full of stamina. Those things could not occur while I was so heavy.

Quote:
does anyone else ever feel like they will never get there?
In previous attempts (1/2 hearted ones) - yes. I doubted highly that I would ever get the weight off. I didn't think I was capable of it. Didn't think I had it in me.

I was wrong. I had the ability the whole time. The whole time. I had it in me the whole time, I just had to dig down deep to find it........

Because this last time - there was no doubt in my mind - that the weight was coming off. Zero. Zippo. Nada. Zilch. We do have the choice whether to be fat or not. And I finally realized that I didn't have to be fat if I didn't want to be. Finally figured out that this wasn't rocket science. This wasn't some hare-brained, crazy, out of this world outrageous unthinkable, unheard of thing to do. It was weight loss. It was something I DID (do) have the power to control. It was within my hands. I got myself into the mess, and I was going to get myself out of it.

Upon becoming miserable enough and sick and tired enough of living my life on the sidelines and fearing for that life, I said, enough is enough. It's time to deal with this. It's time to do something "grand". It's time to stop dying and start living. It's time to step up to the plate and do whatever is required to live the healthiest and happiest life possible. It's time to start taking care of me and my health. It's time to start taking care of the mother of my three precious children. It's time to get this weight - OFF. OFF. OFF. I didn't want to be fat any longer. I was done. And thoroughly and completely determined to get it off.

So I committed to "do it" And I did.

Decide to do something and it SHALL be done. No ifs, ands or buts. No questions. No doubts. No way it can't happen if you're determined to MAKE it happen.

Chunkey Munkey - commit to it. MAKE it happen. And you WILL get there. There's no way that you CAN'T. And trust me on this one, you won't regret it one bit when you do.

The sidelines are not a great place to be. Get into the action. Get into the game. Be a part of it. You don't even know what you're missing. Weight loss is a DOABLE thing that anyone and everyone CAN do. Yourself included. You have no excuses NOT to do this. No valid reasons. You ARE capable of doing it. Take those doubts away. Because believe me when I tell you - you CAN do this. You really, really can. And you should.
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Old 09-12-2009, 10:36 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockinrobin View Post
I wasn't living up to my full potential, not even close.
That's EXACTLY how I feel/felt (not as much anymore as I did now that I took control and am getting there!)!!!

I always felt like if I couldn't control that ONE thing.... how could I possibly control the rest of my life? I mean, it's MY body for godsakes!

But you can't give up... and you can't keep making excuses for yourself! You HAVE to get up off your arse and DO IT.

Not talk about doing it.

Not think about doing it.

Not wish you were doing it.

JUST.FREAKIN.DO.IT.

And never stop til you've gotten it.
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Old 09-12-2009, 10:49 AM   #8
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I feel like that. That my life hasn't really "started" yet but it would/will when the weights gone.
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Old 09-12-2009, 10:57 AM   #9
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I have felt that way ~Especially since My loss is slowing down~but Then I tell myself ~LOOK HOW FAR I HAVE COME?
Even it it takes me another year I got this....AND I WILL DO THIS.

JUST STAY DETERMINED!!! YOU ARE DOING GREAT.

And just remember the more we lose the slower the weight drops.
(I had to focus on that one cause I was an losing an average of 10lbs a month now I am down to 4 to 5 lbs a month)
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Old 09-12-2009, 11:00 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by starfishkitty View Post

I always felt like if I couldn't control that ONE thing.... how could I possibly control the rest of my life? I mean, it's MY body for godsakes!
Yes!!! And because I felt that I couldn't or I should said that I WOULDN'T "control" my own body - I had no self respect for myself. I always knew I was falling short, wasn't doing what was required, what was expected of me. And it's just a lousy feeling that trickles down to all aspects of your life. No way to live.

And this next little paragraph of yours, you put it perfectly. Just perfectly.
That's *IT*

Quote:
But you can't give up... and you can't keep making excuses for yourself! You HAVE to get up off your arse and DO IT.

Not talk about doing it.

Not think about doing it.

Not wish you were doing it.

JUST.FREAKIN.DO.IT.

And never stop til you've gotten it.
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Old 09-12-2009, 11:06 AM   #11
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I use to think that way when I first started out on this journey but now that I have accomplished so much and I know I can do it, I know I will get there.

Hang in there and don't ever give up on yourself
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Old 09-12-2009, 11:31 AM   #12
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I may never get to my ultimate destination (150 lbs), but the journey is as important as the destination. I may never get "there," but I surely can get much closer than I am, and there are benefits to each and every pound lost.

Worrying about whether I'll get there, I can lose sight of and lose appreciation for what I have already accomplished.

In the past, I would often give up when the goal seemed unreachable. Not exactly forgetting that giving up would return me to my original weight or higher, I just didn't see that my current (lower) weight was any better than my highest weight.

This time is different in that I appreciate that how far I have come, and know that what I've gained is worthy of keeping (even if I can't make it to my ultimate goal). If I had to make a choice between this weight and my highest, I would pick today's weight. Even though it doesn't seem like there's much difference between 394 and 319 lbs, there were things I can do now that I couldn't do at 394.

Just as I know there are things I'll be able to do at 300 lbs, that I can't do now. I don't have to look at my ultimate destination, just the few steps in front of me (that's hard enough).
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Old 09-12-2009, 12:09 PM   #13
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I think we have to take a cue from Nike and "just do it". Don't over think anything ... just take it one small goal at a time and before you know it, we'll all be there!
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Old 09-12-2009, 12:41 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by kaplods View Post
I may never get to my ultimate destination (150 lbs), but the journey is as important as the destination. I may never get "there," but I surely can get much closer than I am, and there are benefits to each and every pound lost.
This is such a great point and one that we seem to often lose sight of!

I feel better in every respect forty pounds down from my original weight and even if I never lost another pound, what I've done so far would be worth it.

I think that setting "thin" as the goal can be too much. Sure, it will be nice to get there eventually but that doesn't minimize the importance of losing each and every pound.
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Old 09-12-2009, 01:41 PM   #15
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My goal is to ride the roller coasters with my grandkids again. Right now I don't fit, but I will fit and then we are going roller coaster hunting.

I do have times when I think "I can't do this, I don't want to do this, I will never succeed." That is the talking to me. I have to listen to the angel on the other shoulder who says I can do this.

Listen to your angel.

Just look how far you have come already.
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