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-   -   maybe I'm overreacting (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/100-lb-club/175423-maybe-im-overreacting.html)

girlonfire 06-29-2009 12:53 AM

maybe I'm overreacting
 
This post isn't really related to weight, but something that has been bugging me.

The other weekend, we were at my sister's wedding reception(me and my other sister) when she mentioned out of the blue that she would choose her friend as her maid-of-honor rather than me, even though I have known her longer than anyone. She said it was to "reduce sister" competition, but I still feel hurt because even though I love them, they came into our lives fairly recently and I guess a little part of me feels hurt that my sister would pick her friend over me, who she has known for 5 years. Maybe I'm being oversensitive...

kaplods 06-29-2009 01:12 AM

So who did your other sister (the one getting married) pick as her maid-of-honor. If it was neither you or your other single sister, I can see your sister's point. Which sister is she supposed to choose? The one who got married and didn't ask her to be her maid-of-honor. Or you, to rub it into the face of the married sister who didn't choose her?

Thinking outloud, maybe she was rationalizing to herself why your other sister didn't ask her to be her maid-of-honor. I think it's more about HER than about you.

I have two sisters, only one of which is still single. She was our other sister's maid-of-honor, and the sister that was newly married was my matron-of-honor only five months later, and so that leaves me "in line" to be my single sister's matron-of-honor (unless she chooses someone else). But, I'm not really counting on the job, when the time comes, because I'm living in another state, and they live within a mile of each other. I've "teased" them both that I moved out of state to shirk my responsibility, so that the bossiest sister (the one whose maid of honor, I was) could do the job twice (she's very organized, and really did make an awesome matron-of-honor).

girlonfire 06-29-2009 01:35 AM

Both of my other sisters are married. One got married in a courthouse and didn't have bridesmaids. The other did not have a maid of honor in her wedding party.

I know it's silly to be upset about something like this, I guess I was just offended she randomly said that to me even though she has stated multiple times she is not considering marriage for another 5-6 years at least. Part of me is a little sad about it. I'm sure when the time comes I'll care more about how her wedding is than my role in it.

Thought I would clarify that I have three older sisters and the older two are about 10 yrs older than me.

kaplods 06-29-2009 03:33 AM

I do understand why it would be easy to be hurt, but I also understand why someone might choose to have no maid of honor, or to choose someone other than family, if the remaining choice was likely to cause hurt feelings.

I'm not sure that this really came out of the blue, it sounds more like she was thinking out loud (and maybe trying to think through or cover her own hurt feelings that she wasn't chosen as a maid-of-honor).

Regardless, I think she was thinking out loud, and there's nothing to stress over, right now. When the time comes, she may choose to go the route your other married sisters did and have no maid of honor, or she might decide to ask you or one of your other sisters.


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