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Old 05-31-2009, 05:07 PM   #1
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Hoping to keep my girls more active during this summer, I got summer passes to the local pool. And today we went.

I've lost 60 lbs this go round and a little more than a hundred total. I even had to get a new suit because the others were too loose. As usual, I was one of the bigger women there, but I wasn't the only one. But I still got a "OMG, quick, Mark, look at her" while passing some third or fourth graders and a "wow, that's Aerin's mom" from a gaggle of giggling sixth graders. I'm glad my daughter didn't hear.

And the water was waaay cold.

Back to the gym.

Barb
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Old 05-31-2009, 05:32 PM   #2
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Nothing can be crueler than a gaggle of children. Sad thing is, at least one of them probably picked up the "fat=gross/bad/etc" meme from their parents.

I know it's not very charitable, but you can look at it this way: the odds are that at least a third of the kids will figure out the hard way what it's like to be on the other side of the stares!

Congratulations on losing 100 pounds! You should be very proud of yourself ... and I'm sure your daughter is proud of you, too!

Be strong,
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(PS. Dropping in on this board, because I saw your post on the main page.)
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Old 05-31-2009, 05:47 PM   #3
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Wow.
You are a much better woman than I: you put on a bathing suit in public. Ack! My husband has the kids, right now, as we speak, at the pool.

I just can't tolerate rudeness. No, sorry, this wasn't just being rude: it was cruel. What's wrong with people these days?
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Old 05-31-2009, 06:06 PM   #4
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I think parents today are doing a terrible job of teaching the lessons of tolerance, kindness toward others, and respect to their children.

Please don't let it affect you if at all possible. Just focus on staying on the road to health, which you are doing fantastically at by the way(!), and raise your girls to be more compassionate and empathetic than those horrible kids were today.

Stay strong!
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Old 05-31-2009, 06:35 PM   #5
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Appearance can not be the judge of the quality of the person inside. I'm sure you have taught your children that, as I have mine. Unfortunately, it seems 80% of the population are raising self-centered children who believe the world revolves around them. It will be a scary day when they realize the falsehood of this.

Kudos to you for taking the "plunge" -- I bought a more flattering bathing suit this year, so I wouldn't continue to miss out on fun with my kids. And, I'm slowly learning that being an exceptional parent is my job, not worrying about the insensitive idiots around me!! So, if it means a few rude comments about my size in order for my boys to remember all the fun they had as child, so be it
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Old 05-31-2009, 06:50 PM   #6
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I find it odd why 'fat' people are always ridiculed in public in a very audible way. Yet other people who may suffer from differences (disability etc) aren't made to feel less than.

Grrr...I hate mean people young or old!
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Old 05-31-2009, 06:58 PM   #7
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I'm thinking people assume we became overweight "on purpose" -- so it's okay to pick fun -- that we are possibly too lazy to try to lose weight -- not knowing that most of us have tried multiple times to lose weight. Whereas, someone missing a limb, mentally challeged, etc. has "no choice". I would still rather be overweight than too stupid to realize you are hurting someones feelings by your rude comments.
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Old 05-31-2009, 07:16 PM   #8
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Barb,

WOW!!! 60lb. That's great. Don't worry about what they say. I once heard someone say, "I may be fat but I can change but they will always be ignorant and stupid."

Walk with your head held high. 60lb of hard work is a something to be proud of.

Well done.
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Old 05-31-2009, 07:44 PM   #9
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You keep going Barb! Screw everyone. People, old and young, can be thoughtless and gdm rude.

Kudos on the great work!

Byw, a friend of mine responds out loud to those and any awful comments with "I'll pray for you."
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Old 05-31-2009, 07:47 PM   #10
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Thanks -- I am just whining -- it's nothing my DH gets and it's not the first time. It just made me angry this time, which I suppose is a step up from just feeling sorry for myself, and there's really no excuse for coming unglued on kids even if they are being rude. Just needed some place to vent to and I'm grateful you folks are here.

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Old 05-31-2009, 08:19 PM   #11
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Uch. How horrible. I'm sorry you had to go through that. You should be proud of your accomplishments. You have every right to be at that pool.

Quote:
Byw, a friend of mine responds out loud to those and any awful comments with "I'll pray for you."
I like that response. Truth is someone SHOULD pray for them. If I were their parents I would want to know about it. Teach my kids right then and there right from wrong.
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Old 05-31-2009, 11:37 PM   #12
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Been there. Done that. Gawd it sucks.

I'm sorry that you had to go through that. One thing I like to say?

In a very very shocked voice "Do you realize what you just said?????"

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Old 06-01-2009, 11:28 AM   #13
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Congratulations! Last summer I was to embarassed to go to our pool at our town house complex very often. My daughter told me this year "Mommy, you promised we would go" My daughter has a rare skin condition that makes her skin red and flacky. People stare at her and say rude things. I need to be an example to her and not let these things stop us from having a good time.
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Old 06-01-2009, 02:07 PM   #14
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I go swimming at our public pool nearly every day. I must say that it doesn't bother me at all. I take my outer clothes off in the car and walk to the pool in my bathing suit. I just stand up straight and smile at people and often say "hi" to them. It shuts them up right away.

I even have guys try to get friendly with me, which always surprises me because ... well, I'm in a bathing suit and I weigh 260+ pounds. The key is to just act confident like you own the world. And you will! (Fake it 'til you make it.)
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Old 06-01-2009, 02:39 PM   #15
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Whereas, someone missing a limb, mentally challeged, etc. has "no choice".
Okay I'm a bad person but I never assume anything is a tragic accident of which someone had no influence. One of my friends husbands can barely read because he fried his brains on recreational drugs and I've known people who have lost fingers and toes doing really stupid things. That doesn't mean you get to ridicule them in public. But plenty of those are 'their own fault'. :P
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