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Starting again already this year---argh!!

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Old 02-15-2009, 09:55 AM   #1
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Default Starting again already this year---argh!!

I'm posting this more as a way of accountability to myself than anything else. I started back eating right in January, lost 12lbs, screwed up and gained them back plus 3 more.

This is crazy. I really do want to get this weight off, I mean I have to as I am having knee replacement surgery this Summer and need to get at much off as I possibly can.

I am finding that I am my own worst enemy. I tell myself I am going to stay on plan as I drive to the store and buy candy---why do I do that? I can give great advice on this forum but I find I have trouble applying it to my own life.

Okay, so it is February 15th, it is a new day, I AM a good person even with all my struggles, and being here at 3FC is going to help me.

There! Positive and ready for the day...thanks for letting me post this, just saying it all made me feel better!!
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Old 02-15-2009, 10:13 AM   #2
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It's all about trial & error, seeing what works for you, and learning how to live a new lifestyle. It's difficult, but we all learn! GOOD LUCK!
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Old 02-15-2009, 10:49 AM   #3
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I think it is good that you posted this. We all struggle... see ticker... But it is good to be accountable!

Keep positive!! You will win!
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Old 02-15-2009, 12:18 PM   #4
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Could I please speak to the adult in charge?

Now look, you have to take those car keys away from that kid! She doesn't care what you say, she's going to drive to the nearest food hole and fill up on crap!

Seriously... You need to find a way to control those impulses. And that does mean saying "No, not today!" Yell it at the top of your lungs if you need to, pull the car to the side of the road, turn it off, and get out and walk around the block if necessary, but the rule has to be No, Not Today.

Make sure you have plenty of on-program snacks and that you are eating enough food, also. Sometimes people put themselves on too restrictive a plan and then they can't help but fail.

Good luck!

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Old 02-15-2009, 01:21 PM   #5
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I think one of the hardest things about losing weight is that you "do" have to eat!!!

I don't know if there is an adult in my life--sometimes I wonder---but I need to find her and bring her up to the front of the class, that's for sure...

About 3 years ago I successfully lost 100lbs (I've gained back half) so I know I can do it, and fortunately I've (sort of) stopped myself before I gained it all back...

Thanks for the encouragement and tough love too everyone--I know that there are others on this site that go through this, and so far today is being a great day, I feel positive and am on plan...I just need to have about 3-400 of these great days and I'll be in great shape!!

And of course, posting is great exercise, and we all need to get some exercise, right!!
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Old 02-16-2009, 12:45 AM   #6
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I am starting over tomorrow as well.... DH started our diet out strong last week, but my the end of the week it ALL went down hill due to him getting laid off and health issues, we know that there is no excuse to stick to the diet. So we made a pack to get back in the game tomorrow
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Old 02-16-2009, 05:17 AM   #7
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Stephanie, we both live in Washington and have similar start/end dates--cool!

We can do this, it is just a matter of recognizing where you're at and starting fresh.

I started a blog too, I'm using any tools I can this time!!!

P.S. love your iguana!
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Old 02-16-2009, 05:57 AM   #8
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Scarlet, when I read your post, it reminded me of something I've done in the past. I will start to crave something...I'll use an example of chocolate. I will tell myself I'm going to the store to buy a small candy bar...but I will not buy a big bag of chocolate. I know in my head I will get the big bag, but I lie to myself and tell myself I'm going to stay on plan and get just the small candy. Then I go to the store and buy the big bag, and because I feel guilty about it(knowing I'm lying to myself and failing my diet), I buy a bag of chips and a pizza too...and then go home and eat it all at one sitting.

Telling myself I will be good and just buy the small candy bar is really just justification to get myself to the store...because I really don't want to deny myself this splurge. So I need to learn to be honest next time and say "you CAN'T GO TO THE STORE when you are having a craving and stick to your plan". And if you are going to go to the store at least be honest about it and admit it's so you can binge. Because if you can be honest with facing what you are doing, you may be able to take the next step...of trying to fix it before you do it.

Honesty...hard to do, isn't it?

OK...I read something today that I haven't had a chance to practice (because I'm in control mode now, and this is a trick for binge mode). I don't know if it works or not, but maybe you might try it next time and if it does help, let me know.

First, when you are obsessed with a need to binge, concentrate on some positive memory...something beautiful that made you really happy and or peaceful...and then rub your chest with one hand, and belly with the other, and breath deep and slow, and maybe you can relax the feeling of hollowness inside your heart and stomach that is making you want to fill the void. Sort of a positive thinking and relaxation technique. I'd really like to know if the person who wrote this is a quack, or if it might be a legitimate trick to use.

The positive thoughts part is a redirect to get your mind off the food obsession and/or negative feelings about yourself...the rubbing and deep breathing is a relaxation technique to relieve the anxiety or depression that might be contributing to your need to feel better with food.

Anyway...good for posting here and letting people encourage you to try again and learn from your past mistakes. After all, that's what those mistakes are for, right? So we can learn how to do it better next time?
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Old 02-16-2009, 12:01 PM   #9
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We all screw up from time to time . . . the key is getting back on track as soon as possible before the damage is too great.

Good for you for posting and starting again TODAY!
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Old 02-16-2009, 12:12 PM   #10
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I love this place---not only for all the support, but it really does help to know that other people not only go through what I go through, but are also finding ways to overcome it and go on...

Recidivist---that's an interesting idea---I so identify with just having a "little" sweet and ending up with way more!

I had a successful yesterday, dropped more weight than I thought I would (probably some water, we'll see) and now on to today. I need to make good eating a habit and a desire, and make it through all the Easter candy that's out in the stores......another argh but not really---I would so rather be thin than be eating chocolate right now.....and be buying myself a new outfit instead of food!!
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Old 02-16-2009, 01:07 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JayEll View Post
Could I please speak to the adult in charge?


JayEll will never steer you wrong, Scarlet. She speaks the truth. Pull that car over the minute you hear your inner adult struggling to be heard. You can do this!!
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Old 02-16-2009, 02:28 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarlet View Post
I tell myself I am going to stay on plan as I drive to the store and buy candy---why do I do that?
You might want to really think about the why. Why do you want the candy? Are in the mood for something sweet? How about a Skinny Cow ice cream instead? Are you just feeling snacky? How about some baby carrots and salsa?

If you're anything like me, those are occasionally the reason why, but normally it's something else, something emotional. So many of us turn to food for comfort or to relieve other feelings. But really, not only doesn't it work, but it comes with extra added guilt. (Free with every candy bar!)

Emotional eating isn't necessarily a binge. For some people it is, but for some people it's just the thought pattern that leads us think things like, "I've had a crappy day and I deserve some chocolate." We just develop these habits of thinking that the food will fix things or help in some way. Even if we don't consciously realize that that's the reason we're reaching for the food, sometimes taking a few minutes to ask "why" can help us figure it out.

I'm a lot better these days, but still when I get really stressed or angry or sad I have to remind myself (sometimes out loud) that the only problem food can fix is hunger. And then I try to figure out what might really help. Do I need to rant to a friend? Write long 3FC posts about why life is hard? Sit down and have a good cry? Give myself permission to take a break from whatever I'm doing? (Yeah, that last one is a doozy. It took me a long time to understand that in my head, when I felt like I didn't have time to take a break, a break for food was acceptable.)

So as you're walking into the kitchen or reaching for the bag of candy, take a minute and ask yourself why. Not "why don't I have any willpower?" or "why am I so bad at this?" - don't beat yourself up. That's not going to help. Ask: Why do I want this? What am I thinking it's going to do for me? I think you'll be surprised at the answers. I know I was.

Lisa
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Old 02-16-2009, 06:13 PM   #13
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Thank you for sharing! I hit 12 pounds off today and I really want to continue on this track, and not bounce back like I have so many times before!

I definitely can relate with trips to the store for as much as I can buy from a gas station without being embarrassed of just awful foods. They flip that switch in my head! "I will feel better now", and the worse later doesn't matter as much.

The difference for me this time has been substitution. I have really made an effort to cook healthy and prepare healthy snacks. I still feel like I have an unhealthy relationship with food, I look forward to dinner way too much, lol. But by cooking with lower fat, lower cal and fat free ingredients I have found some tried and true meals and snacks that I truly enjoy, and that don't knock me off my path. I also work from home now so I don't have to drive by those temptation spots!
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Old 02-16-2009, 06:30 PM   #14
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Quote:
the only problem food can fix is hunger
Lisa, that would be a great sign to put on the refrigerator door...along with a list under it of options of things to do to get your mind off food.
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Old 02-17-2009, 01:44 AM   #15
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I am so glad for all the posts here, reading them is so making me think---it is so true that the food I reach for isn't what I really want, and though it may taste good for the few seconds it is in my mouth, that is over quickly and all the reasons I really overate are still there...

Getting to the heart of the matter is really a key isn't it? Being willing to tackle the emotional or other areas of my life that create an environment where I am swimming but not getting anywhere...

I feel so empowered when I read all these posts and I had a good day today. I really looked forward to coming home from work and coming back to 3FC and just spending some time here---so thank you so much everyone!!
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