So today was my best friends birthday. And I made her the most delicious white cake with lemon and rasberry filling, and homemade buttercream frosting. Yum yum. I swore to myself I wasn't going to have any, but I couldn't resist and had a piece probably an inch and a half thick. (it was delicious btw) And I also had a cocktail when we went out.
But now I'm feeling very down on myself. I've been on South Beach for 1 1/2 weeks and haven't cheated at all and was a big fat cheater tonight!!! I feel like "oh here we go again, I can't commit to anything" And I can't help these feelings of sabotage entering my mind. Like I'm telling myself I'm not strong enough to be in it for the long haul.
What a great friend you are, that cake sounds delicious! I wouldn't worry too much, Birthdays don't happen everyday I kind of slipped up tonight and had an extra pack of 100 calorie cookies! I must say sweets are my weakness Diets need a little wiggle room so the good thing is we can jump back on the wagon again tomorrow
That cake sounds incredible. I love light fruit fillings like that one. That being said, I know exactly how you feel about "oh no, here I go again" comment. Good you are recognizing it and admitting it here. Get right back on your plan tomorrow. I try to remind myself this is a JOURNEY and there will be twists and turns along the way.
Qtest...are you never gonna eat birthday cake or have a cocktail ever again? That kind of mentality is just setting you up for failure! You had a rather small piece of cake...you should be congratulating yourself on that fact! Life happens and as butterfly said, we need some wiggle room in there!
As for that inner voice telling you that you've messed up, tell it to shut up! That is literally what I do if I happen to slip up and that little voice in my head says, "Well I knew this was coming!" I tell it to quiet up and remind myself that slip-ups happen. I can't possibly be good for the rest of my life, haha! And you can't expect yourself to be either!
My friend always reminds me "Moderation in all things including moderation." I think the hardest part about an eating plan is to stop thinking of a piece of cake as a mistake and start thinking of it as an anomaly.
Like in the stock market no stock or fund goes in a perfect linear line if you look at it on a day by day basis there's all kinds of peaks and valleys, but as long as a stock in my portfolio is trending up I'm happy. So I try to look at the trend line over larger periods of time. If the last 10 weeks has your weight trending down and it's still trending down, one blip of cake won't even show up in the big picture.
That cake sounds yummy and it really sounds like you didn't overdo it - but - and I could be mistaken, I'm pretty sure that South Beach has a list of foods you MUST follow and those that you are simply NOT ALLOWED to eat, especially for the first couple of weeks and therefore there program "won't work" if you don't follow it to a "T". Perhaps you'd be better off with a less restrictive program - like calorie counting . It would allow you the occasional splurge with no guilt.
Nothing wrong for most people to have an occasional small piece of birthday cake. You do NOT have to be perfect. Repeat: You do NOT have to be perfect. It is only a problem for most people if it sets off a binge, or if the person decides she is a "failure" and "what's the point anyway." Get back on plan today. You'll be fine. It's what you do most of the time that counts. Try to rid yourself of the perfectionist mentality. You will never be perfect. You don't have to be.
One of the favorite analogies on 3FC: If you trip on one stair, do you throw yourself down the rest of the staircase? If you get a flat tire, do you then slash the other three and then set the car on fire? (I added the last part!)
Like most people on here, I have lost and regained lots of pounds over the years. The only reason I have lost and kept it off this time (knock on wood!) is cause I reject that perfectionist mentality. If I eat off plan, oh well. I get right back on. What you do next is what matters. Plus, a small piece of birthday cake is not a calorie tragedy. Sounds like you did really well, actually.
If you get a flat tire, do you then slash the other three and then set the car on fire? (I added the last part!)
That's great! Good thinking
Qtest, I think you did wonderful. Think of how much you would have eaten before? Bigger slice? More than one? How many cocktails would you have had on a previous night out?
Change is change, no matter how small or or big, it all makes a difference. Congratulate yourself on indulging in a responsible matter!
The first thing to do is STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP about it! The only thing that will do is bring you down. People don't realise it, but we need to talk to ourselves the way we would to a cherished friend or family member. What things would you say to them right now? You certianly wouldn't beat them up and berate them, so why would it be ok to treat yourself that way either?
You did great, tomorrow is a new day and a new choice. Enjoy it. It's about finding a way to LIVE not a way to never enjoy food again.
Refocus girl!--- You have already had great progress on your weightloss. I sometimes have to remind myself that this is a journey and a lifestyle plan. I'm not counting any single food out for my entire life... and really, one piece of cake isn't going to make me regain all my weight. Now-- if I throw in the towel after eating said piece of cake and consume 10,000 calories over the weekend because of it... well that's just not good. Pick yourself up and move on... at least you exercised moderation with the cake and drink.
As for South Beach, maybe it isn't the right plan for you...? To each his own, I tried South Beach and it didn't work for me. I followed the plan to a T and dropped like 10 pounds in a week. However, I couldn't eat that way... my body was reacting terribly (stomach problems) and I ended up crabby and moody. In the end, I quit and ate enough to kill a horse... so now I am just trying to keep things balanced and watch my calories on Fitday. In the end it is all about how you feel... eat the foods that satisfy your mind and body. ...Nutritious food really does make you feel better.
All in all I would say you are doing great. Don't let a little slip derail you.. and maybe try to look at is as more of a treat. Treats are ok in moderation... you can do this!
I wish my best friend would make me cake on my birthday
Don't feel down on yourself. What kind of life would it be if you couldn't eat cake every once and a while? Cake is Godly.
Thanks ladies for all your support!! You're all right! I need to get over trying to be a perfectionist, but sometimes I can't help myself I've been like that for 23 years And I did eat a little piece. And made sure the leftovers went elsewhere!
As for the South Beach diet. You were right rockinrobin. There are definite yes and no foods. I'm in phase one with outlaws most things. That phase is for 2 weeks and up until my cake splurge I was doing wonderfully. I still like the diet and can't wait to add in whole grains and fruit next week. Too bad there is no place for birthday cake. But I believe eliminating those foods from the diet are to remove your bodies addiction to them as well. So I think if I don't slip up often the diet should still be sucessful.
Thanks again ladies. You made me feel much better!!!!
Birthday Cake Splurge :(
And I also had a cocktail when we went out. 
Diets need a little wiggle room so the good thing is we can jump back on the wagon again tomorrow 
. It would allow you the occasional splurge with no guilt.
That's great! Good thinking 
