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-   -   Long Journey..what got you started? (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/100-lb-club/150478-long-journey-what-got-you-started.html)

mollymom 08-30-2008 10:15 PM

Long Journey..what got you started?
 
100 pounds...what a challenge. At that recommended 1-1.5 pounds per week, we are looking at two years of a challenge!

What got you started? What keeps you going? ANy "ah-ha" moments.

I don't have much in common with the "I have to lose five pounds so my Size 6 jeans aren't tight" group. But I would like to know what motivated my 100-to-lose_ sisters.

I don't mean to demean the issues confronted by the "I can't fit into my Size-6" BUT, our overall issues are a tad different, at least IMHO.

SO, What got YOU started, and what keeps you going?

FB 08-30-2008 11:54 PM

Good question.

What got me started was the story I briefly outlined in my celebrating 100 pounds lost thread. Son, Christmas present, his sadness at it not fitting.

One thing that keeps me going is self-discipline. I never suspected I had it. I mean, I know I'm the most stubborn person ever - but I didn't know the depths of my discipline.

Another is patience. You have to have patience in weight loss.

Yet another is the amazing feeling of the results. Not only of the pounds shed but the euphoric feeling exercise brings on and the powerful feeling of new strength.

Another... I'm having this wonderful honeymoon with myself. I'm learning all about me. I can't say this journey has been bad, I don't regret having gotten to the point where I had to do this. I wouldn't be learning so much about myself. I love every bit of this. Although it's like my childhood - I will NEVER go through this again - you couldn't pay me to!

Yet another reason I continue is my people. Not only do I do it for myself, my son and my husband but my friends and family. Heck - even my personal trainer. She says in her 20+ years of experience she's never met someone so dedicated. I am determined to be her biggest success story.

KforKitty 08-31-2008 04:49 AM

I can identify very well with what FB has said about why I keep going(although I've not quite reached the 100lb, yet). I too am very strong-willed and when I make up my mind to do something, I do it. Of course there have been times I've struggled but I keep that song in my head "When the going gets tough, the tough get going".

What got me started this time around is less clear. Something just 'clicked'. I've always liked nice clothes and was finding it increasingly difficult to find things that looked good on me. Although I had no major health problems I was finding it more and more difficult to do anything remotely physical and would be wiped out by a 10 minute walk. I just decided that I would enjoy my life more if I was lighter. I didn't even set off to lose 100+lbs, just thought I'd take it as far as I could. I still don't know what my goal will be - I just know its less than I currently am.

Kitty

midwife 08-31-2008 09:04 AM

Well, I've only lost 50 pounds, but I am not so sure there is such a differentiation between the journeys of those who lose 10, 20, 50, 75, 100, 100+.

We all have used food in an unhealthy manner---many of us struggle with binge eating disorders. We all have to change the way we eat and exercise---and no, your journey will not be for 1-2 years. It will be for the rest of your life---if you want to maintain. Anyone who is changing her relationship with food from a destructive one to a healthy one has to fight the same battles day in and day out---the poundage is not the only story here. I can never go back to eating the same way I did, any more than Robin can, or Meg, or Glory or any one else who is maintaining. That is a daily challenge (or struggle or victory---depending on the day).

One of the things I like best about 3FC and the 100 lb Club is that we are all in this together and we share many of the same struggles and commitments. This is a forever change for all of us.

Best of luck to you.

rockinrobin 08-31-2008 09:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mollymom (Post 2340702)

SO, What got YOU started, and what keeps you going?

Hmmm... What got me started?

A few things, a build up of more then 20 years of suffering. To name a few:

- I had an incredibly sedentary, unproductive life.
-Not living up to my full potential.
-My knees ached and ached and were getting worse year by year.
-I was terrified, simply terrified of all the harm I was doing to myself by having the added poundage. I knew that it was only a matter of time before it caught up with me. I always had a sense of impending doom. I knew it was when, not if, some totally unavoidable disaster would strike - heart disease, diabetes, certain cancers, stroke. I was also terrified and anxiety ridden about non-death issues - falling down, breaking a bone and not being able to get proper care.
-I was terrified that I wouldn't be around to get my daughters married and see my as of yet unborn grandchildren. There was no way on earth I could get through all the work entailed to make a wedding and then the actual event itself.
-Clothing situation was horrible, just horrible.
-social situations, school functions - all brought on more misery
-even every day stuff like shopping and doing my basic errands were very difficult
-Just basically sitting on the sidelines and not being a full participant in life.

And then one day I woke up out of the fog. And realized that if I didn't *want* to be fat, that I most certainly did not HAVE to be. That it was totally and completely in MY hands. My choice. My doing. MY control. I held the key the whole time. Who knew? I was the one who got me into the mess and and sure as anything, I would be the one to get me out of it.

What keeps me going?

I'm never going back. Never. Ever. Ever. My life is wonderful now. Wonderful. Even the tough stuff is easier to take now that I am a healthy weight and the huge EXTRA, totally UNNECESSARY burden of being overweight is gone.

I have a life filled with much more joy and waaaay less misery.

Some things that keep me going, though there are hundreds, literally hundreds of reasons why I will never, ever go back. Why I keep fighting the fight. Just a few:

-Perfect medical results from the doctor. PERFECT. All of my health worries have totally ceased. Are there any guarantees in life? Nope. But at least I know that I have done all that I can to prevent some pretty nasty diseases.
-Having tons and tons of energy. Man it makes doing things soooo much easier. And enjoyable.
-Clothing. Clothing. Clothing. What used to be pure HE%L, is now a huge joy to me.
-I have rediscovered my femininity. It's GREAT to be female.
-I am a social butterfly. I used to dread social situations. Now I can't get enough of them.
-The summer - another thing I used to dread and now I LOVE it and am sad to see it going.
-Swimming
-Being able to get around with ease.
-My children & family. I cheated them out of a happy, productive mom & wife for years. They deserved better, as did I, and now they're getting it. They are SOOO proud of me.

For the record, not to sound too cocky or anything, so please forgive me if this comes out wrong - when I finally made the *decision* to lose the weight, I will tell you, it wouldn't have mattered if I had to lose 100, 165 or 265 lbs - I was just THAT determined. There was no stopping me. I tell you this not to boast or anything, just so that you can know that losing weight and any amount is DOABLE and that you too CAN ABSOLUTELY do to this. And you should. And I promise you this, you won't regret it - not for a teeny, tiny second. I wish you all the best. Robin.

synger 08-31-2008 10:17 AM

Pain.

When my weight creeps up to the 290-300 level, my knees and feet start screaming at me. It's always a wake-up call. I know that I have to journal about the pain, the awkwardness, the fear, when I have it... because once I get down to the 270-280 level, it goes away again, and I'm more likely to slip into the "I'm all right now" mentality, and begin eating poorly again.

But as I age, that window of pain gets bigger and bigger. I know women my age (44) who have to use canes, or scooters, because their weight has "broken" their feet and legs.

I will NOT be like that. I'm the major bread winner in my family. My husband works part-time so he can get our second-grader off to school, and be there for her after school. They depend on me. I CANNOT allow myself to be crippled by fat. It is not an option.

H8cake 08-31-2008 12:41 PM

Thanks for starting this thread, I think it's so helpful to remember why we started the weight loss journey. It was seeing my mom dying. She did not look anything like herself. She had suffered from diabetes for 15 years and it led to a heart attack and totally ravaged her body. She was afraid to move for fear she would have another heart attack. Nobody could reason with her that moving would be the best thing for her body. I was having some pretty scary symptoms of diabetes myself, and at twenty years earlier than she started having the same symptoms. That was my wake up call. I had to figure out how to get this weight off and keep it off. For me it's so much about self discipline and patience. It's not a quick fix this time, it's to finally solve the problem for good. Now that the weight is dropping I am beginning to see how much I was miserable in my own skin before. I absolutely hated the way I looked and it kept me from doing so many things. I still am very self conscious, but it is so much better than it was. It gets better every day. I think of my mom a lot during this process and wish I could have helped her avoid all the health issues she had. I can't do that but I can help my kids to learn how to avoid it. I feel like I'm showing them that it isn't impossible, it is very doable, this healthy way of living. I can relate to what Robin says about realizing that I don't have to be fat, I am in control of this situation and I can change it. I'm realizing how much the weight has to do with just not liking myself too, I think it was very much a form of self abuse. I'm starting to see how eating better and exercising is showing self respect. I care enough about myself to not destroy myself.
Lot's of heavy stuff :dizzy:

fiberlover 08-31-2008 12:42 PM

There wasn't really a big moment that made me change, although seeing the number at 250 on the scale is what ended up getting me going and continuing.

Unlike others, it has taken me 4 years to lose 100 pounds, I think that in taking that long, I have learned enough and made enough things a habit to be able to maintain weight loss.

thistoo 08-31-2008 12:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mollymom (Post 2340702)
100 pounds...what a challenge. At that recommended 1-1.5 pounds per week, we are looking at two years of a challenge!

Well I've been at it more than two years now and I'm not quite to the halfway point, so it really is a longer challenge than I anticipated.

What got me started was my sister's wedding. She made me wear a sleeveless dress even though I asked her not to (my arms are the part of my body I am most self-conscious about, since they're abnormally large), and she got my mom to sew this ridiculous shawl thing as a compromise. I looked miserable and exhausted in every single picture, and it makes me sad to look at them even now. I just didn't want to be that miserable person anymore.

Fast forward two years and I have struggled a LOT with this weight loss, as we all do, but I keep moving forward. Even during the year when I bounced back and forth between 220 and 218 (yes, for a whole year -- it took me that long to come to terms with the fact that I was insulin resistant and sticking to vegetarianism wasn't working for me), I never gave up and gained back the weight. So when I feel like giving up, I think about that and keep at it. It's either keep going or go back to being that sad, lonely girl, and that's just not an acceptable choice anymore, you know?

Rosinante 08-31-2008 01:17 PM

when I nearly got it right in 02 - 04, there were two, no 3 starters

1. went on holiday to France by myself (242lbs) and despite speaking French well, I just panicked in restaurants, therefore ate hardly anything - and wasn't hungry! It was a real penny-dropping moment, that I didn't Need to eat the amount I did.
2. My dogs, now rising 13, were then 7, and I started to be very cautious about weighing what I fed them, I mean to the gram! so that they shouldn't be fat and arthritic. (And they're not. The poor old lab died a couple of years ago but the other 5 bounce around like Tigger) I suddenly realized I took better care of them than I did of me.
3. I was so happy in my new job, that I didn't need to stuff my face.

02- 242
04 - 136

Fast forward 4 years of the job getting grinding, and then terrifyingly stressful, and I began on 07/31 at 217. The main stress (a huge building project) is over, and I'm hoping to move soon (interview Tuesday and Wednesday). I've just got to the place where I want to look after myself again, plus it was so cool to be 136.

Glory87 08-31-2008 01:58 PM

I've posted mine before, but always happy to post the story (since it still feels like my own personal miracle).

I had been heavy since high school where I started my first diet at age 15. I lost weight, gained weight, lost weight, gained weight. I honestly felt like I had tried "everything" and just couldn't lose weight and keep it off. I thought I had tried "everything" because I had tried to basically starve myself (dexatrim was involved) and wrongly thought if I couldn't lose weight by NOT EATING then I just couldn't lose weight. This was wrong thinking on my part, I actually hadn't tried "everything" at all.

Flash forward to 2004, I was 35 years old and weighed 200 lbs. I just quit looking at myself, didn't care what clothes I put on my body, avoided cameras, hated being naked. I wore the same pair of loose fit size 18 Eddie Bauer jeans practically ever day (I didn't want to buy any more jeans, because that would be admitting I was heavy). I was sluggish, depressed, tired - I fell asleep in my office every afternoon and could hardly keep from nodding off during meetings.

In the summer of 2004, three things happened in quick succession:

1. My mom really wanted me to come visit for Christmas. I love my mom, but had been avoiding visits because I didn't want her to see how huge I had become (she has been bird thin my entire life and doesn't really understand weight issues).

2. I went to see Dawn of the Dead. I went to the bathroom and when I sat down, I cut the outside of my left thigh on a metal trash can. I realized I was "too big" for a normal sized bathroom. My thigh bled and I cried, thinking of a lifetime of airline seat belt extenders.

3. I loved to browse "diet" books at bookstores. I picked up Super Foods Rx: 14 Foods that Will Change Your Life and it was like I had grabbed hold of an electric fence. All of a sudden, I knew I could do it - I could change how I ate forever and be a healthier person. I bough the book (in hardcover!) and immediately changed how I ate. That's one of the reasons I knew it was "for realz" for me that time, I didn't wait until Monday to start, I started that very second.

So, here I am - over 4 years later, still eating super foods, still calorie counting, still food journaling, still accountable. I lost 70 lbs and have kept it off. It was a long journey and the journey is still going....for the rest of my life. I lost 10 inches off my waist, I went from a 42DD to a 34D, a tight size 18 to a comfortable size 6. Instead of one pair of jeans, one pair of shoes, no earrings and long, frizzy hair, I have a gorgeous closet of size 6 clothes and tons of cute shoes (hair is still frizzy though, can't have everything ;)).

If you had told me 5 years ago that I would be measuring my 1/2 cup of granola for breakfast or cutting up apples on Sundays for snacks all week or making lunches everyday or saying no to birthday cake at work, I would have said "UGH who wants to live that way???" But I can honestly say that eating whatever I wanted did not make me a happy person. Eating well is a lot of work, but it is so worth it to me.

chick_in_the_hat 08-31-2008 04:44 PM

I wanted to get my tubes tied...my doctor told me I was too fat for the surgery. It was the first time it dawned on me that my size was keeping me from something I wanted.

Teeni 08-31-2008 04:59 PM

Hmmm, to be honest Ive been on this Journey since I was old enough to realize I was overweight. But what recently kick started it was, hehe, my pants which I bought after my last weight loss stint, quit fitting right. I know I know you didn't want to hear that, but its things like that which make me realize I fell back into old habits. That one thing lead to a line of thinking, on my mother's side of the family there is diabetes and heart disease. Even when I was young I suffered from high cholesterol at times. I realized I'm 22 years old and at risk to so many problems health wise, I could die or even start suffering from diabetes at a young age. The look on my fiance's face when I told him I'm at high risk for heart disease and diabetes is enough to keep me going. I want to get my dream job, running through woods saving wolves, buy a house, have children, and live to the ripe old age of 114. I've wanted that for as long as I can remember, if there is anything that would hold me back from that or keep me from enjoying that to the best of my ability thats my weight. And Ill be if anything is going to keep me from that when Ive worked so hard to get as far as I have at reaching my dream.

Ufi 08-31-2008 05:46 PM

I had to go on blood pressure medicine, and I thought, "This is no way to live." Also, around that time, I had the realization that I no longer needed to be fat, that I'd worked on the issues that got me here and feel capable of taking care of myself without the fat and approaches to life that got me fat.

provence 08-31-2008 06:58 PM

I've been talking about doing something about my weight for awhile. I kept making excuses why I couldn't go to WW (one program that I've done any number of times & have been very successful) -- too busy w/the kids, too much stress at work, whatever. I also realized why I could never maintain my weight losses. As soon as I was at goal, I wanted to forget I was ever fat so no more WW for me. That just led to a reemergence of old, lousy eating habits. So I figured I needed to go back and have accepted that I will have to go to WW until I die. That was realization #1.

Then, my DS who is 10 seemed to be getting embarrassed that mom was fat. There is no way in h*** that I would intentionally hurt my baby. Reason #2

DH's cousin (who could stand to lose herself) recalled a family party when I was at goal and remarked how beautiful I looked. She remembered my dress in amazing detail. Yeah, I did pretty darn good. And I liked looking good. Haven't felt that way in 10 years. Reason #3


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